Uchiha District, Naka Shrine.
As an ancient clan with a thousand-year legacy and one of the Founding Ninja Clans of Konohagakure, the Uchiha held a position of great importance in Konoha.
The Uchiha owned a vast amount of land in Konoha and controlled an Independent Armed Force—the Guard Division. They could arrest villagers and ninjas suspected of crimes and lock them up in the Guard Division prison.
Such privileges naturally bred resentment. In the eyes of many Konoha ninjas, the Uchiha were less a clan belonging to Konoha and more an independent minor ninja village that happened to cooperate with Konohagakure.
The Uchiha ninjas, meanwhile, took immense pride in their clan's privileges.
Yet it was precisely that pride that made the High Officials wary of the Uchiha and suppress them. The clan could never truly integrate into Konoha and became a semi-marginalized clan within Konohagakure.
After the Nine-Tails' Rampage, a cataclysmic disaster, the Konoha High Officials grew more wary of the Uchiha than ever.
To weaken the Uchiha, the Konoha High Officials cut funding for the Guard Division and moved the Uchiha District to the edge of the village, isolating the clan from the central areas.
Faced with this thorny situation, ambitious Uchiha rose to speak freely at clan meetings, debating how to make the Uchiha great again and claim the Hokage Position that rightfully belonged to them.
Uchiha Youhu was one of them. Seated on the tatami, he watched the Hawks and Doves squabble in silence, so relaxed he almost felt like having some tea.
As far as he knew,
the Uchiha were divided into roughly three factions.
One was the Doves, led by Uchiha Shisui, who advocated integrating into Konoha.
Another was the Hawks, led by Uchiha Yachiyo, who advocated seizing power through a coup. Then there were the Moderates, led by Uchiha Fugaku.
In Uchiha Youhu's view,
the Doves Shisui represented were far too weak. Danzo had even stolen his Mangekyo, yet he didn't have the nerve to fight to the death. He might as well go be a dog for the Hyuga Branch Family.
The Hawks, led by Yachiyo, talked about a coup day in and day out, but after four or five years of discussion, they still hadn't come up with a workable plan.
All talk of a coup, while their actions betrayed how much they enjoyed being pushed around by the Hokage Building.
And Clan Head Uchiha Fugaku hardly needed mentioning. He was a complete fence-sitter, too half-hearted to surrender and too indecisive to launch a coup.
In the end, he'd be killed by his own son. What a waste of all that strength.
With a bunch of useless fools like these, how could the Uchiha possibly avoid extinction?
Uchiha Youhu sighed softly, then raised his hand. "Fugaku Captain, Elder Yachiyo, I have a way to obtain the Hokage Position without shedding a drop of blood."
"A way to obtain the Hokage Position without shedding a drop of blood?"
Youhu's words immediately caught the attention of every Uchiha present. Hawks and Doves alike turned toward him, eager to hear his brilliant plan.
Fugaku came over to Youhu and said with a smile,
"Youhu, what's your idea? Tell everyone."
Youhu glanced at Fugaku and replied evenly, "My plan might require Fugaku Captain to make a sacrifice."
"If it means the Uchiha can produce a Hokage, then I should be willing to make any sacrifice."
Fugaku thumped his chest, ready to do his duty.
Youhu nodded with satisfaction, then walked to the podium and laid out his plan. "My idea is for the clan to arrange a marriage alliance with the Hokage Faction. Once the Uchiha and the Hokage Faction become family, they'll naturally stop treating each other as outsiders."
"And the best match would be the Third Hokage, who lost his wife."
"An alliance through marriage is certainly a good idea, but there's no suitable candidate in the clan, and the Third Hokage might not want to take an Uchiha as his new spouse..."
Desperate for a solution, Uchiha Fugaku began considering whether a marriage alliance was feasible.
Then he noticed the strange looks from the clan members around him. Only then did he remember why Youhu had said he would need to make a sacrifice.
Could this guy be suggesting he divorce Mikoto and offer her to the Third Hokage?
He might have been struggling a little in recent years, but this was a matter of masculine pride. He'd never offer up his wife to curry favor, and the Uchiha would never be so spineless.
Youhu was completely insulting him.
Just as Fugaku was about to settle the score with Youhu, Youhu smiled mischievously. "If Fugaku Captain is willing to divorce Sister-in-law Mikoto and marry the Third Hokage, then the clan will have a Hokage's Man."
"Fugaku Captain marrying the Third Hokage and becoming the Hokage's Man?"
At those words, the Uchiha present wore strange expressions. Even Fugaku was left dumbfounded.
Putting aside whether being the Hokage's Man counted as being Hokage,
the Third Hokage already had a son and a grandson. There was no way his Sexual Orientation was men, and he certainly wouldn't marry Fugaku. Youhu was talking nonsense.
"Youhu, stop talking nonsense. I'm not divorcing Mikoto, and I'm not marrying the Third Hokage."
Fugaku did his best to stay calm, but he could barely contain his anger.
Youhu shook his head and grinned. "Fugaku Captain, are you really not going to think it over? I honestly think the Third Hokage is into your type. You'd be the only one making a sacrifice, and the whole Uchiha would benefit."
"You!"
Before Fugaku could respond, Youhu continued, "My fellow clansmen, I'm really not making this up. I've looked into it carefully, and having the Clan Head marry the Third Hokage is the best choice for the clan."
"Why hasn't the Third Hokage remarried all these years? Why does he keep letting Old Thief Danzo get away with things?"
"Because Old Thief Danzo is the Third Hokage's type. Men are like fine wine—the older they get, the richer they become. I'm sure Fugaku Clan Head has more charm than Old Thief Danzo..."
"Besides, a Preference for Men has always been a Tradition Of Successive Hokage."
"The First Hokage loved Uchiha Madara. Old Thief Tobirama was devoted to Elder Setsuna and Senior Kagami. The Third Hokage and Danzo loved each other even as they fought."
"The only one who didn't like men, the Fourth Hokage, lasted less than a year before sacrificing himself for the village."
"What does that tell us? That a Preference for Men is a Tradition Of Successive Hokage. If the Uchiha want to become Hokage, we have to follow that tradition."
"Fugaku Clan Head, don't you want to become Hokage? Start with this little sacrifice..."
After hearing Youhu's speech, silence fell over Naka Shrine. The Uchiha exchanged glances, unsure what to make of it.
Uchiha Youhu was obviously talking nonsense, slandering the relationships between the Successive Hokage and the Uchiha Ancestor. But it somehow sounded reasonable, almost as if it could be true.
They said history was like a little girl who could be dressed up however anyone pleased. Perhaps this was Konoha's real history.
Fugaku, who was about to become a Hokage Husband, had gone beet red. His eyes bloodshot, he shouted at Youhu, "Youhu, get out!"
Under Uchiha Fugaku's pressure, Youhu had no choice but to avoid the confrontation for now. Under everyone's watchful eyes, he left Naka Shrine.
Amid Youhu's outrageous speech, the forgotten leader of the Doves, Uchiha Shisui, sat in the middle of the crowd, gazing at Youhu's back in deep thought.
After leaving Naka Shrine, Youhu went to the riverbank. He gazed at the rushing water, the corner of his mouth curling into a subtle smile.
[The host's lie, "Secrets Behind Successive Hokage," has been acknowledged by a large number of Uchiha ninjas.] [They are "half-convinced," believing something like this may have happened in reality. Reward: 500 Deception Points.] [Current Deception Points: 550]
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