Missing Thoughts Literature

There was no sound in the Saint Hall Main Hall, because Sage Chang Gen's consciousness could not speak. All information went straight into his disciples' minds.

What Yu Sui sensed wasn't a voice, either, but "information."

That didn't stop her mind from automatically giving it a voice.

"Five Elements Power creates 'techniques.' When people give 'techniques' form, what they use is Five Elements Qi."

"Your Light Core contains Five Elements Qi that can be absorbed and refined. When it connects with the qi outside your body and the qi within, you can use 'techniques.'"

Yu Sui stared straight ahead and listened attentively. Beside her, Mei Chengyu watched in silence, thinking that whether this Junior Martial Sister even had a Five Elements Light Core was still an open question.

Sage Chang Gen said, "Qian, Kun, Xun, Zhen, Kan, Li, Gen, Dui. The Yin-Yang Bagua. Take its fifty-two hexagrams: Xun is wind, and gives rise to the technique of Wind Riding."

A Black and White Bagua slowly turned beneath Yu Sui's feet. As Sage Chang Gen taught her, the Xun character on the diagram rotated around until it faced Yu Sui, then stopped.

"Draw on the Five Elements Qi in your Light Core. Take a Nine Schools Technique from the Bagua: Wind Riding."

When Yu Sui closed her eyes and focused, making contact with the Five Elements Light Cores inside her, three hundred of them answered at once. In that instant, the Light Cores fought among themselves, each vowing to carve a path through the mass of three hundred equally powerful cores.

It was precisely because there were too many Light Cores that they couldn't answer her when she needed them most and give her their power.

Every Light Core held the same amount of power.

They fought among themselves, unable to reach a result.

Yu Sui had tried before, but she had no way of dealing with the ever-growing number of Light Cores.

Over the past two years, whenever she tried to force a connection with them, she instead felt a power blocking her.

It wasn't the strange fire, but another force within her, both unfamiliar and familiar.

The strange fire wasn't the only thing that had come into being alongside her.

There was also the half-missing Breath Soil.

It was the same now. Deep in her consciousness, the strange fire illuminated a small patch of darkness. Something else lay hidden within it, and the strange fire kept it from swallowing the entire area.

"Focus."

Sage Chang Gen's reminder made Yu Sui's heart skip.

The word was ambiguous, and could give rise to many interpretations.

Did he mean to focus on a single Five Elements Light Core, or to focus on learning the Wind Riding Technique in front of her and think of nothing else?

Yu Sui could only control the Five Elements Light Cores individually if she separated them from one another. When the cores were inside her, anything she called for would answer in unison; she couldn't make them act alone.

Seeing Yu Sui fail, Mei Chengyu asked Sage Chang Gen, "Does she have a Five Elements Light Core?"

Yu Sui opened her eyes, somewhat sheepishly, and looked at Mei Chengyu. "I do."

Far too many.

Mei Chengyu rubbed his chin, thoughtful. "That's unusual."

She had Light Cores, yet her talent compatibility had been measured at ten percent. If she had poor compatibility with the Ghost Dao School and wasn't suited to cultivating it, then every other school had measured her at ten percent, too.

Or perhaps none of the major schools currently in vogue were suited to her?

Sage Chang Gen said, "There's no rush."

Yu Sui thought that if she couldn't learn it tonight, she'd have to walk back to the dormitory in the dark. Tomorrow her legs would be so sore she wouldn't be able to get out of bed. She might as well stay here and study through the night.

It wasn't as if she slept well anyway.

Yu Sui steadied herself and stood in the Bagua diagram, continuing to communicate with the Five Elements Light Cores.

Mei Chengyu watched for a while. It looked like her cultivation wouldn't progress anytime soon, so he lowered his head and went back to playing with his Listening Wind Ruler.

Xing Chun was having dinner with Zhongli Shan and Cang Shu tonight, so he hadn't sent a barrage of messages to pester him.

Mei Chengyu glanced over the messages from everyone else and replied to the ones he could.

Yu Sui asked Sage Chang Gen many questions over there.

She asked, "Master, do techniques born from the Yin-Yang Bagua belong to no particular school?"

"Different schools have different methods of cultivation, and the techniques born from the Yin-Yang Bagua differ as well. The techniques in the Sixty-Four Hexagrams are universal. Those beyond the Sixty-Four Hexagrams are different."

Yu Sui suddenly understood. She crouched down and touched the Bagua diagram on the ground. It turned as her finger traced across it.

"The Yin-Yang Bagua and the Five Elements are the foundation of the Nine Schools Techniques. Because each school has its own pursuits, beliefs, and rules, the Nine Schools Techniques that evolved from them differ as well," Sage Chang Gen said. "The Ghost Dao School seeks the highest realm: 'the physical body dissolves, consciousness endures, and one becomes one with Heaven and Earth.'"

"For thousands of years, the Yin-Yang School has sought the ultimate secrets of the universe."

"The Daoists seek immortality, which is the opposite of what my Ghost Dao School seeks."

"The Military School walks the line between life and death, seeking the extremes of both."

"The Logicians give all things a place and seek out everything nameless on the Xuangu Continent."

The master's explanation perfectly illustrated what it meant for techniques to arise from the Dao.

Yu Sui traced the Bagua diagram, and when the Xun character turned to face her, she pressed down on it with one finger.

She once again drew on the Five Elements Qi from among the three hundred Five Elements Light Cores. Yet they all answered at once and competed with one another, while part of their power was being suppressed. The result was the same as before: none of them managed to lend Yu Sui its power.

Yu Sui couldn't help regretting it, as she often did.

Should she have avoided shattering that first Light Core? But then she thought it over: as long as she could keep producing new Light Cores, this problem was inevitable.

So how could she get out of this bind?

Yu Sui opened her eyes and lightly tapped the Xun character on the Bagua diagram, lost in thought.

Neither Sage Chang Gen nor Mei Chengyu disturbed her.

Late into the night, Mei Chengyu looked up from his Listening Wind Ruler and glanced at Yu Sui, still crouched on the ground studying the Bagua diagram. In a lazy drawl, he said, "Looks like you won't be making it back to the dormitory tonight."

Yu Sui didn't even look up. "Senior Martial Brother, are you leaving?"

Mei Chengyu rose and headed for the door. "You're not sleeping, but I am."

Yu Sui scratched her head, still staring at the Bagua diagram. Her reply was somewhat absentminded. "Goodbye, Senior Martial Brother."

And you're still being polite at a time like this?

Mei Chengyu looked back from the doorway. Yu Sui had turned her head to study the other side of the diagram. In the warm light, the tilt of her head revealed her pale neck, dotted with a fine sheen of sweat.

Was it hot?

Mei Chengyu didn't feel hot. He threw the Great Hall Door wide open, and the cool night breeze rushed inside, making the scrolls on the desk flap and rustle.

Yu Sui heard the noise and paused. She looked up, lifted a hand to tuck back the loose hair at her temple, and saw Mei Chengyu standing with his back to her in the doorway.

Mei Chengyu gazed at the Milky Way for a while, squinting. Then he turned back to Yu Sui. "I'm hungry. What do you want to eat? Since you're studying so hard, I'll bring you something, too."

Just then, Yu Sui's stomach gave a soft growl.

When no one brought up food, Yu Sui was so absorbed in studying that she didn't feel hungry. But the moment someone asked what she wanted to eat, her body answered honestly.

Yu Sui thought for a moment, then listed a whole string of meat dishes for Mei Chengyu.

Mei Chengyu listened in silence, then gave a cold laugh. "I'll pick what I want."

Yu Sui said, "All right. Thanks, Senior Martial Brother."

As Mei Chengyu walked out, he sent Xing Chun a message. "You asleep?"

Xing Chun replied, "Not yet."

Mei Chengyu said, "Midnight snack."

Xing Chun replied, "I'm coming, I'm coming!"

He was still awake in the middle of the night, keeping watch over the shifting stars in the Yin-Yang School. When Mei Chengyu mentioned a midnight snack, he perked up and headed to the Dining Hall.

The Dining Hall was open twenty-four hours a day and never closed.

But late-night food cost more than it did during the day. The prices were absurdly high, so late at night, students relied on their own abilities to sneak food out of the Dining Hall.

Following the menu Mei Chengyu had given him, Xing Chun used his excellent Body Techniques to quietly pack up food from the Dining Hall and take it away.

The two met outside the Yin-Yang School.

Xing Chun carried two large food boxes. When Mei Chengyu arrived late, he asked, "Why'd you order so much meat?"

"There's someone else," Mei Chengyu said.

Xing Chun was curious. "Who else? Isn't it just you and me?"

"Nangong Sui." Mei Chengyu took one of the food boxes from him. "I'm going to eat at the Saint Hall."

Xing Chun was utterly baffled. "If you're going to the Saint Hall, where am I supposed to go?"

Mei Chengyu looked at him.

Xing Chun asked again, "You can get into the Saint Hall, but I can't."

Mei Chengyu said nothing.

Xing Chun quickly gave in. "Fine, we'll eat at the Saint Hall. I'm not eating alone."

The Yin-Yang School was some distance from the Ghost Dao School. As the two used Wind Riding to travel, Xing Chun heard about Mei Chengyu watching Yu Sui learn the Wind Riding Technique from their master.

"If she has a Five Elements Light Core, why can't she refine Five Elements Qi to learn Wind Riding? That doesn't make sense." Xing Chun couldn't make heads or tails of it. "And if she has a Five Elements Light Core, why does everyone in Qingyang call her a Normal Practitioner? Her family even paid a huge tuition fee under the rules for Normal Practitioners enrolling in the academy."

Mei Chengyu said, "Why are you asking me? Who should I ask?"

Xing Chun said, "Ask your Junior Martial Sister!"

Mei Chengyu wasn't going to ask.

He had little interest in any of that. What did other people's cultivation have to do with him?

Yu Sui was still stubbornly wrestling with the Wind Riding Technique. Through the strange fire, she sensed people approaching. Apart from her Senior Martial Brother Mei Chengyu, there was someone else.

When Mei Chengyu called for her and Yu Sui went out, she saw Xing Chun standing by the Saint Hall entrance in the distance. He stood there all alone, holding the food box and gazing over anxiously, afraid Mei Chengyu would break his promise and leave him eating by himself at the gate.

To Yu Sui, Xing Chun was tall and slender, with handsome features. At first glance, he looked like one of the glamorous young heirs from the capital. Standing by the distant gate now, though, he looked rather like a gentle, endearing puppy.

Mei Chengyu had packed the food Yu Sui wanted into one box. He handed it to her and said, "Do what you like. I'll eat over there."

Yu Sui carried the food box and followed behind him. "Senior Martial Brother, I don't like eating alone, either."

The two headed toward Xing Chun at the gate.

Only then did Xing Chun relax and open the food box to start eating.

All three focused on eating, as if that was all they had come for and there was nothing else to discuss. After Yu Sui had satisfied her hunger, she gathered up the leftovers and put them back in the food box. "Senior Martial Brother, I'm full."

Then she turned and headed back toward the Saint Hall Main Hall.

Mei Chengyu didn't stop her.

Only after Yu Sui had gone some distance did Xing Chun turn to Mei Chengyu and ask, "Is she planning to practice in there all night?"

Mei Chengyu gave a quiet "Mm."

"Studious and hardworking," Xing Chun said around a chicken leg. "She's putting in so much effort. How could Sheng Zui have the nerve to call his little sister an idiot?"

Mei Chengyu said, "His little sister's Five Elements Light Cores are the problem, not her brain."

Xing Chun looked back and waited until Yu Sui had entered the Main Hall before turning around. Then he lowered his voice and gossiped, "I heard Sheng Zui couldn't stand Gu Gan before and kept picking fights with him because his little sister liked Gu Gan, while Sheng Zui didn't."

Mei Chengyu glanced at him coolly. That was so convoluted. Was he trying to make himself understood, or not?

Xing Chun didn't care whether Mei Chengyu understood. He chatted away in front of a familiar friend. "If my sister fell for someone I hated, I'd be so heartbroken I couldn't stand it. I can totally understand how Sheng Zui feels about Gu Gan."

Mei Chengyu thought for a moment. "Didn't you say Gu Gan liked that Legalist?"

"Xun Zhiya!" Xing Chun snapped his fingers, growing animated. "Nangong Sui and Gu Gan were childhood sweethearts. Gu Gan and Xun Zhiya fell in love at the academy over time. Wouldn't that make Sheng Zui even angrier? If it were my sister, I'd definitely beat Gu Gan up. Then he'd lose five points, and if he lost two more, he'd be demoted."

Mei Chengyu said, "Don't imagine you have a sister. You don't."

"Why don't I have a sister?"

Mei Chengyu's face was expressionless. "Ask your dad."

Xing Chun rubbed his chin. "It's fine if I don't have a sister. If something like that actually happened, I'd be so mad I couldn't sleep or eat for three days and three nights."

They both bent their heads and kept eating. A moment later, Xing Chun said, "When Shi Yuezhen comes back, do you think Cang Shu will stop eating with us?"

Mei Chengyu asked in return, "You want to eat with those two?"

"Wouldn't that just be asking for pain, watching them feed each other?" Xing Chun shook his head furiously, then continued, "Yesterday I saw Xiaoshan standing outside the School of Techniques without going in. Has he still not made up with Su Tong?"

Mei Chengyu was carefully picking meat off a chicken bone. Without raising his head, he said, "Probably not. How long did they give each other the silent treatment last time?"

"Two months, I think." Xing Chun thought it over. "Something like that. It's almost been that long this time, too. Once he and Su Tong make up, it'll just be the two of us eating together again."

He lowered his head and took a couple of bites, then looked up with a solemn expression. "We made a deal, remember? We can't stop eating over women."

"Cang Shu and Shi Yuezhen are childhood sweethearts, made for each other. That's fine. But look at Xiaoshan and Su Tong: breaking up and getting back together, again and again. They're sweet for a while, then give each other the silent treatment, fretting over love tens of thousands of times. And that's without even bringing up their family issues. That's not something to encourage. Don't learn from them."

Mei Chengyu had finished eating and was picking out the little bones, carefully piecing the roast chicken back into its original shape. "You're the one who gets a pretty girl looking for you every day, right?"

"You get them, too, but you ignore them all. Good job." Xing Chun patted him on the shoulder in approval.

Mei Chengyu's hand jolted at the pat, and the half-assembled chicken collapsed. Expressionless, he said to Xing Chun, "Put it back together."

Xing Chun picked it up and pieced it together again. The two chatted here and there.

They went from their close friends' love lives to the Dining Hall's food, from the food to their new roommates, and finally from their roommates to their own cultivation problems.

"I've been stuck at the Ninth Realm for a year. I feel like I've hit a bottleneck. I'm this close to breaking through, just this close." Xing Chun held his fingers apart to show how close. "I've spent two months in the Star Sea Heaven, and still haven't comprehended a Tenth Realm Soul."

Xing Chun clasped his hands together, then spread them apart. A star chart appeared from nowhere, shining brightly in the night. Countless stars on the chart glimmered with a deep blue light.

Mei Chengyu sat beside him with one hand propping up his head, helping him observe the changes in the star chart.

He asked, "Which direction are you watching?"

Xing Chun pointed south. "The Zhuque Seven Mansions. Their position never changes, but the surrounding stars have made three hundred and sixty rotations. According to my teacher, when the main star stays fixed and the subordinate stars move, the number of rotations tells you how many changes there will be."

Mei Chengyu studied the star chart and said calmly, "You need to make them stop turning, or keep them within three rotations. Either would give you a chance. Your Yin-Yang School stresses that the stars remain unchanged. You've seen three hundred and sixty rotations in the Zhuque Seven Mansions—that's too many changes. Try something else."

Xing Chun sighed. "I've watched all the Four Directions Star Constellations. They're all over a hundred rotations."

Mei Chengyu nodded and said unhurriedly, "Go try the sacrificial rites."

Xing Chun said, "I won't."

Mei Chengyu said, "Then keep watching."

Xing Chun looked at him. "Don't you have any cultivation troubles you could tell me about? It'd make me feel better."

Mei Chengyu thought for a moment. "Not really."

Xing Chun: "..."

Mei Chengyu continued helping Xing Chun study the star chart.

He had also reached a cultivation bottleneck, but he wasn't worried. He had already found a way to solve it.

The sky grew faintly bright. The night mist lifted, and dew gathered on the little white flowers growing along the vine. Drops fell from the petals onto the ground.

The mist was thick in the spring morning, and the chill reached deep into the hearts of the two men by the gate. Xing Chun, sitting at the entrance, stretched and rubbed his eyes.

"It's morning already."

Mei Chengyu stood up. "I'm going back to the dormitory."

"I'll go back and sleep for a bit, too." Xing Chun stood with him, packed up the food boxes, and asked, "Is your Junior Martial Sister still inside studying?"

As soon as he finished speaking, Yu Sui ran out of the Saint Hall Main Hall.

The two watched Yu Sui run toward them from far away.

Yu Sui said in surprise, "Huh, Senior Martial Brother, why are you still here?"

She had known all along that the two of them hadn't left, but she still had to put on an act.

Mei Chengyu didn't answer. He only asked, "Learned it?"

Yu Sui shook her head. "No."

Mei Chengyu laughed and pointed in a direction. "The Yin-Yang School is pretty far. Run."

Yu Sui ran off.

Xing Chun sighed. "That child works hard. She's sure to become a Sage someday."

Da Yu Sui really did run all the way to the Yin-Yang School.

It was only just getting light. She hadn't slept all night again, and by the time she reached the Yin-Yang School, her head was spinning. She leaned against a wall for a long while before she finally recovered.

There were other students up early on the road, but they were all taking their time and weren't in a hurry. When they saw Yu Sui running, they looked surprised.

Yu Sui crouched by the wall and used a twig to draw a Bagua diagram on the ground. When she reached the Xun trigram, she tapped it with the twig, her expression thoughtful.

After repeated trials the night before and her master's guidance, Yu Sui had gained a new understanding of the light cores inside her.

There was no one nearby, so Yu Sui quietly separated one light core from the strange fire and tried to absorb its Five Elements Qi. But the light core kept that power firmly locked away. She could control the Five Elements Light Cores she had separated, but she couldn't draw the Five Elements Qi out of them.

Nor could she crush all the light cores until only one remained. The moment she tried to draw Five Elements Qi from them, they would instantly multiply until she had reached the maximum number of light cores she could possess.

Her master had said, "Your Five Elements Light Cores are resisting some kind of power."

Yu Sui was certain it wasn't the strange fire.

Apart from the strange fire, only the Breathsoil remained.

The Agricultural School's Treasured Item, Breathsoil, had the power to make things flourish without end. It was the perfect fit for the Agricultural School Nine Streams Technique, and exactly what they needed most.

Yu Sui didn't cultivate the Agricultural School Nine Streams Technique, and she only had half of the Breathsoil.

Perhaps possessing an incomplete Treasured Item did more harm than good.

Yu Sui had always focused on the strange fire and the Communication Array. She had rarely studied the Breathsoil, because it seemed to sit quietly inside her without the slightest reaction.

It wasn't until the past two years, when she tried to extract Five Elements Power from the Five Elements Light Cores, that she sensed something was wrong. And that unease seemed to have something to do with the Breathsoil.

She asked herself, What now? Should I separate the Breathsoil?

Then I'd die.

Yu Sui propped her face in both hands, frowning as she racked her brain.

In the days that followed, Yu Sui was troubled by the matter. She went back and forth between the Yin-Yang School and the Taoist Saint Hall, studying all day without sleeping. Mei Chengyu would occasionally visit the Taoist Saint Hall to chat with his master. Every time he came by at night, he found his Junior Martial Sister still awake.

One night, Mei Chengyu saw Yu Sui walking around a Bagua diagram in the Saint Hall Main Hall. His expression was unreadable as he said, "You still can't dissolve your physical body and preserve your consciousness. If you work yourself to death, you'll really die."

Yu Sui didn't even turn around. "I rested during the day."

Mei Chengyu raised an eyebrow. "That Old Man at the Yin-Yang School didn't scold you?"

Yu Sui, crouched over the Bagua diagram, paused and touched her cheek. "He did. He was really fierce. Pretty scary."

She had to admit, when the old man's eyes shone at her like blades, even if she wanted to sleep, his glare scared her wide awake. Back at the State Academy, the instructors had all been wary of her County Princess status; none of them dared scold her for sleeping in class. But now that she was at Taiyi Academy, every teacher was a Thirteenth Realm powerhouse. They weren't all from Qingyang, but none of them would indulge her.

Mei Chengyu walked over and sat down at the table. "What did he scold you for?"

Yu Sui thought back. "For having a bad attitude toward learning."

Mei Chengyu nodded.

"He said I was getting ahead of myself just because I knew a little of the basics, that I didn't know how high the sky was, that I was letting my parents down, and that I behaved terribly—" Before Yu Sui could finish, Mei Chengyu cut her off. "Then go complain to our master."

"Huh?" Yu Sui turned to look at him. A sheen of sweat glistened on the tip of her nose under the lamplight. "Complain about what?"

Mei Chengyu lifted his chin, his manner haughty and imperious. His voice sounded cold to Yu Sui, too, but unlike Jing Yun Kui's, it wasn't full of hostility or criticism. Instead, it gave her a sense of security.

"The Yin-Yang School puts great stock in etiquette and seniority. He thinks you don't respect your teachers, but he never considered that you're our master's disciple. Jing Yun Kui's teacher was our master's grand-disciple before switching to the Yin-Yang School. If you really count the generations, this Old Man should call our master Grand Ancestor. His teacher is your martial nephew, so there's nothing wrong with him calling you Little Ancestor."

The man sitting in the chair spoke lazily, but his words were sharp as a blade. "You're his senior. He has no right to ignore that and lecture you about respecting your teachers, then scold you until you're covered in spit."

Yu Sui sorted out the relationships and asked in surprise, "Can you really count it that way?"

Mei Chengyu gestured toward their master.

Yu Sui looked up at the portrait.

Sage Chang Gen replied, "You can."

Yu Sui understood.

She finally knew where her Senior Martial Brother's confidence came from. Apart from his unruly nature, having seniority on his side really did inspire boundless confidence.

Jing Yun Kui was indeed strict when teaching. For several days in a row, he had called out Yu Sui by name and criticized her in front of everyone for dozing off. She had been listening, but sometimes drowsiness had gotten the better of her and she'd drifted off.

Still, he could scold her all he wanted; Yu Sui didn't really care.

That night, after Mei Chengyu cleared up the relationships for her, Sage Chang Gen went over to the Yin-Yang School. He was back in no time.

The next day, Yu Sui saw Jing Yun Kui walk into class with a terrible expression. He began the lesson without a word of preamble. She cautiously put her head down and slept for a while, but he didn't call her out.

Jing Yun Kui, who had been watching Yu Sui in recent days to see if she was drifting off, now acted as if she wasn't even there.

Yu Sui was finally reassured. She could take a short nap during the day and catch up on some rest.