What's Wrong with Changing for Someone You Like? / Psycho

As the heir to Kanzaki Heavy Industries, Kanzaki Ryuji did not encounter particularly harsh realities in his childhood, but he also had aspects that he was not good at and was troubled by them. Therefore, when he saw what Karuizawa Kei, who was the same age as him, went through, he inexplicably developed a rebellious mentality, or rather, he projected himself onto her to some extent.

"As for her pairing with Kitagawa..."

Although typing this word on the keyboard is incredibly natural in everyday life, saying it aloud in real life still feels a bit awkward. Kanzaki Ryuji hesitated for a moment before speaking:

"Perhaps at first, I just longed for this kind of relationship where mutual trust is at its extreme, just like Kitagawa never said he needed to change the female lead, and he kept saying in various interviews that you were the most suitable partner for him, just like you eventually met his expectations."

Karuizawa Kei nodded rapidly, her face showing an expectant look that said, "Go on, please."

"Starting with my debut in Romeo and Juliet..."

Every word Kanzaki Ryuji stirred up her memories.

In the end, even she herself was somewhat dazed that so much time had passed, so much so that Karuizawa Kei could hardly remember what she was like in the past.

Karuizawa Kei and Kitagawa Ryo's first official debut was in Shakespeare's * Romeo and Juliet *, which was also their first time playing a couple in a production. The promotional posters for the theater at the time featured:

[Starring: Kitagawa Ryo, Karuizawa Kei]

However, starting from the second time, only Kitagawa Ryo's name remained as the lead actress on the theater's promotional posters; she was moved to the [leading actors] list below.

However, during the last few revival performances before Kitagawa Ryo left the stage, Karuizawa Kei's name returned to the lead actress section, listed alongside Kitagawa Ryo.

Karuizawa Kei looked up at the dazzling night sky, and suddenly a strong longing welled up from the bottom of her heart.

Finally.

Inthebookofthedestiny, wetogetherbetweenarowofcharacters.

In the book of Fate, we are on the same line of text.

--Romeo and Juliet, Shakespeare

Chapter 175: What's wrong with changing for someone you like?

After a sumptuous dinner, the four members of Kitagawa Ryo's group, along with Sakura Airi and Amasawa Ichika, gathered around the campfire, chatting casually about everyday topics.

Perhaps because of the addition of the other two, Ichinose Honami and the others tacitly refrained from suggesting playing "Truth or Dare" like they did the night before. Instead, they simply laughed and talked about the interesting things that had happened during their exams these past few days, just like a typical girls' gathering.

"I heard Airi was in grid E5 today and even got first place in the [lyrics] topic?"

"I almost regret not going to see Airi's performance live since I didn't have to pay for tickets. Otherwise, I could have cheered you on. Although there were no glow sticks, water bottles could have served as substitutes... I guess?"

As Kitagawa Ryo spoke, he took out two empty mineral water bottles from his backpack, stood up, and quite skillfully performed a segment of otaku art (a dance or cheering gesture performed by otaku with glow sticks at idol performances and other occasions).

"Does Liang know how to make this?"

This was the first time Amasawa Ichika had ever seen such a sight. She stared wide-eyed in surprise, her round, fluorescent green eyes curiously scrutinizing Kitagawa Ryo.

The other girls present, besides Sakura Airi, were also quite intrigued. Watching Kitagawa Ryo's animated performance, they couldn't help but smile. Horikita Suzune even chuckled softly.

"Ahem... It's been a long time since I played, so I've gotten a bit rusty."

Kitagawa Ryo, without changing his expression, put away the mineral water bottle, sat down again, shook his head, and said:

"And not wearing a support shirt or a headband really doesn't feel right."

"You guys haven't seen the scene at Airi's performance. People like me are usually in the front row, and everyone there is a gachi (true fan), an otaku artist, and their slogans are chanted in perfect unison."

"Shizuku ~Infinite Eternity~ Forever a favorite!"

Kitagawa Ryo's shout made even Sakura Airi feel a little embarrassed, and she retorted with a slightly flushed face:

"She's not bad at letting her fans down, is she? She's clearly Actor in the theater world, but she's totally following the idol industry's path."

As she said this, Sakura Airi recalled the content of the support sign for Kitagawa Ryo she had seen back then:

"What... Liangbao is so handsome, Mommy loves you, and there are also Tian and stuff like that."

Ichinose Honami was the first to break down; she too had witnessed Kitagawa Ryo's period and nodded with a smile, affirming:

"That's true, and we've received a ton of letters from fans."

At this moment Amasawa Ichika acted like a curious child, quickly grabbing Ichinose Honami's arm and shaking it, wanting her to explain in more detail.

"To put it simply, Ryo was only twelve years old when he debuted. Although his acting skills were already very good from the beginning, what really made him a breakout star was his role in 'King Lear.' At that time, a still of Ryo delivering a monologue in the Tempest was uploaded to the internet, attracting many viewers outside the industry."

Ichinose Honami explained with a smile:

"Back then, he was considered the contemporary Taira no Atsumori, possessing a profound sense of melancholy."

"The truth is, everyone's a sucker for young boys."

Kitagawa Ryo curled his lip in disdain. Taira no Atsumori was a historical figure from the Genpei War. In fact, he didn't have any great achievements. It was just that his outstanding appearance and the experience of dying in battle at the age of fifteen were very much in line with the beauty of "mono no aware" that people admired at the time, and he became a frequent character in various literary works afterward.

The famous poem related to Oda Nobunaga, "Life is but a dream, a fleeting illusion," is also from a song called "Atsumori" by Yukiwaka Mai.

Edgar Allan Poe once said that the death of a beautiful woman is the most poetic theme in the world; in fact, it's pretty much the same for men.

Ichinose Honami disagreed with Kitagawa Ryo's statement and continued enthusiastically:

"Thinking back now, Liang was a bit shorter than me back then, and quite slender, so it seems normal that she attracted so many older fans..."

"It's just that girls develop earlier than boys. Do you want to see how much taller I am than Honami now?"

Kitagawa Ryo waved his hand helplessly:

"Actually, I didn't want to at first. After all, I don't have a good impression of idol fans. I always feel that they are seriously immature."

"..."

At this point, Kitagawa Ryo, remained silent for a moment, and then spoke somewhat shyly:

"But if I'm the one being admired, it seems pretty good too."

"The taste..."

The girls around Kitagawa Ryo unanimously responded with disdain to his remarks.

"After all, having a group of people who unconditionally support you no matter what you do is indeed a very fulfilling thing."

Kitagawa Ryo tilted his head and spoke to himself.

At that time, he had not yet met Horikita Suzune, completed her simulation, let alone obtained the manifested talent of [the Heir of the Wealthy Family].

At that time, Kitagawa Ryo went to the stage for the sake of his younger sister and to escape his family of origin. His only guiding principle was to raise money for Hotaru's medical treatment.

So even though he knew that introducing idol audiences from outside the drama circle was a risky business, Kitagawa Ryo still resolutely went along with it.

"Back then, I did earn an unimaginable amount of money and gained considerable fame."

Kitagawa Ryo looked up and gazed at the starry sky:

"But if I had to say, the only person I felt sorry for during that time was Hui."

They Twitter accounts, hold tours in various locations, attract casual viewers, cultivate a loyal fanbase, and then release related merchandise.

Many people who had never been exposed to theater before entered the industry through Kitagawa Ryo. Perhaps some fans genuinely fell in love with the art form because of him, but many more, or rather a significant portion of fans, simply became die-hard fans of Kitagawa Ryo.

This is also a major reason why Karuizawa Kei suffered unprecedented cyberbullying. Moreover, it got to that point that Kitagawa Ryo himself was unable to control these extreme fans. In fact, those people didn't care about Kitagawa Ryo's opinion, even though he had repeatedly expressed his trust in Karuizawa Kei and his decision not to replace the female lead.

What they like is neither the drama nor Kitagawa Ryo's acting skills, but a sense of superiority that allows them to trample on others at will. The better Kitagawa Ryo performs and the more recognition she receives from professionals in the industry, the more justification they have for using this as a pretext to carry out cyberbullying against Karuizawa Kei.

But after all that has been said, it was Kitagawa Ryo who ultimately opened Pandora's Box.

Thinking of this, Kitagawa Ryo also lost some interest.

Karuizawa Kei did indeed withstand the pressure and complete the transformation, but that doesn't mean his methods were without fault.

"But Hui never blamed Liang for this."

At this moment, Sakura Airi suddenly spoke up, and seeing that everyone's attention was focused on her, she added:

"This is what Hui told me herself when I met her today during our [Singing] discussion."

"If Ryo thinks she's just putting on a brave face... then by now, her bravado has become genuine strength."

After listening to Sakura Airi's words, Kitagawa Ryo lowered his head slightly in thought for a moment before raising his head and smiling:

"That's true, none of you are such fragile girls."

"It was I who distrusted you first; it was my fault."

Perhaps just like his attitude towards his fervent fans, Kitagawa Ryo himself had quite mixed feelings when it came to the feelings of girls.

Mingming's initial hope was to witness their growth, and to help each of them grow into the person they longed to be, living for themselves.

But during his days on the Uninhabited Island, after confronting the feelings of Shiina Hiyori and Karuizawa Kei, Kitagawa Ryo had to admit that he actually felt a hidden joy when he saw them willing to change for him or even submit to him.

Just like how he used to hate those fanatical fans, but still felt happy when he was also enthusiastically adored.

This happiness comes from being loved.

No one dislikes seeing someone they like change for them.

But in the past, Kitagawa Ryo always tried to stubbornly correct this, and he wished he could pinch their ears and tell them not to change for others.

Because he feared that the relationship between the two of them would become too hierarchical, both Karuizawa Kei and Horikita Suzune had left Kitagawa Ryo with deep, even unbearable, memories in those failed simulations.

That's why he almost obsessively emphasizes his "demystified" view of love, hoping to strip away all the glamour from both parties.

But now, Karuizawa Kei's words and her remarks about Camus that day have made Kitagawa Ryo change his mind a little.

Changing yourself for the sake of others doesn't necessarily mean distorting your original thoughts. If you can learn something good from the process and ultimately become a better person, it might not be a bad thing.

Kitagawa Ryo smiled as he looked at the girls around him who were looking at him with concern. He finally understood the question he had been holding onto during the last simulation.

Are those who love others happier, or those who are loved?

A healthy relationship is inherently a process of redemption and being redeemed.

Perhaps this was Hotaru's original intention in letting him meet them.

"I remember that directors from other Theater Troupe wanted to poach me, saying things like, 'You're under so much public pressure right now, and many of the comments are just baseless and unfounded attacks.'"

Karuizawa Kei was still chatting with Kanzaki Ryuji about their past experiences.

"At that time, the Theater Troupe also had Liang and me communicate once, but I ended that conversation with just one sentence."

Karuizawa Kei rested her chin on her hand, speaking leisurely:

"I told Liang at that time:"

"I don't want Liang to say—that she hopes I can leave, or that she wishes me peace and safety afterward."

"Liang should wish me success."

"Kitagawa Ryo should wish Karuizawa Kei success."

"Because I sincerely hope that Kitagawa Ryo succeeds, Karuizawa Kei must succeed for his sake."

"We will definitely succeed."

Chapter 176: The Madman

Having been practically forced by Katsuragi Kohei to apologize to Ayanokoji Kiyotaka, it's easy to imagine that Totsuka Yahiko's mood wasn't much better during tonight's seemingly harmonious Class 1-A reunion.

However, Totsuka Yahiko's mood obviously didn't affect the others. After all, apart from Katsuragi Kohei, the other students in Class A didn't pay much attention to him. They quickly resumed their lively chatter. Since everyone was gathered in the E5 area today, the topic naturally veered towards the [Singing] topic that everyone had just witnessed that afternoon and Sakura Airi's amazing performance.

After all, the idol-like charm that Sakura Airi displayed at that time was like a sparkling light to these teenagers of the same age. Words full of longing and yearning kept coming out of their mouths, and almost everyone was marveling at and reminiscing about the scene they had witnessed that afternoon.

But unnoticed by everyone, as the discussion about Sakura Airi intensified, another person's mood also began to plummet. However, compared to Totsuka Yahiko's sour face, Kushida Kikyo still tried her best to maintain a smile.

Almost all the students in Class A overlooked the fact that she had also signed up for the [Singing] project, and no one even cared that she had won second place in the project.

Frankly speaking, given the various factors involved, the primary test of the Singing competition at that time was not the students' actual Singing ability, but their Singing skills in front of dozens of students from their own class and other classes.

As a social terrorist Kushida Kikyo is naturally no stranger to karaoke and singing. With her social skills already maxed out, Kushida Kikyo's Singing ability is equally outstanding, and she is not at all stage-frightened. If it weren't for the unexpected strength of Sakura Airi, it would have been almost expected that she would have won first place in this subject.

But Sakura Airi stole all the limelight from her. Kushida Kikyo's skill level could be classified as excellent among ordinary people, but she happened to meet Sakura Airi, who came from a professional singing and dancing idol background. The gap between amateur and professional was even more obvious.

In fact, this wasn't the first time Kushida Kikyo had experienced this feeling. From the time she was old enough to understand, she realized that her appearance was among the best of her peers. Because she had a better memory than most people, she also excelled in her studies. In addition to being good at sports, she was also adept at handling interpersonal relationships and was recognized by others.

But just like singing, even if she is only moderately good in every aspect, there are still girls around her who are cuter, have better grades, and are better at sports. When Kushida Kikyo loses to other geniuses who are even more outstanding than her in these areas where she is better than ordinary people, she will inevitably feel resentful.

In reality, apart from the two most outstanding and the two worst, everyone else is neither the best nor the worst, but Kushida Kikyo cannot accept this fact.

Despite possessing above-average abilities in all aspects, this only exacerbated Kushida Kikyo's feelings of inferiority.

Not an ordinary person, but not a genius either.

Childhood was relatively easy, and adults were often tolerant of children. They only needed a little bit of excellence, such as solving a simple problem or trying to help their parents with some trivial chores. With just such a little effort, people around them would flock to praise them and label them as geniuses or prodigies.