One, Two, Three-Let's Do It Again
"Of course, I do intensive self-searching on the campus forum every day. Actually, as the Student Council, Suzune can also take some time to browse the forum every day. She can collect a lot of information and gossip that are not very useful but quite interesting. Moreover, this thing is really real-time."
As she spoke, Amasawa Ichika also proactively showed Horikita Suzune her phone screen:
"Look, someone just posted that they saw Ryo and Arisu going out on a date. The format is so bad, you'd think it was some kind of tabloid: '<Kitagawa Ryo, Sakayanagi Arisu make their first public appearance together since the Student Council Keyaki Mall! Holding hands and walking side-by-side, their sweet gestures attract onlookers, effectively dispelling rumors that the two had a falling out over the Student Council election>... The headline is quite long."
"Liang just got back today, right?"
"Yeah, I got back early this morning. Judging by the time, I must have made plans with Arisu beforehand? Anyway, it was a pretty seamless transition."
"It's good that they went out together to clear their heads. After all, I've felt that Arisu has been acting strange lately. Although she has been in contact with Tsubaki, I don't think their relationship is that close. Rather, it seems like Arisu odd ever since Tsubaki hadn't even enrolled last semester."
"Explaining Arisu and Yuki's situation is indeed quite lengthy, but Ryo should have a way to resolve it, and if all else fails, we can use the method I gave him."
At this point, Amasawa Ichika Horikita Suzune's curiosity, prompting her to ask instinctively, "You have a plan too?" No, wait, it was...
What solutions did Ichika come up with to cool things down?
"It's actually very simple. Suzune, do you remember the birthday present I gave you on Valentine's Day? Did you end up using it?"
"Uh... no."
"It's okay if you don't have it now. We can use it again when we have the chance. I use the same method as before: if you can't solve it under the bed, solve it in bed. Sometimes it works wonders."
Perhaps because it was just her and Horikita Suzune in the Student Council activity room today, Amasawa Ichika spoke without any restraint, and her reasoning was so eloquent that Horikita Suzune found herself subconsciously unable to refute her.
"While lust isn't necessarily a symbol of love, without lust, the feeling certainly isn't love, but something else entirely. Sex itself contains the seeds of love. God separated humanity in two so that they could experience loneliness and yearn for love. And God linked love and sex to give love a language or a ritual, and sex a guide or an ideal. Therefore, discussing these two aspects separately is inherently flawed."
"If you're always getting stuck on things when it comes to love, why not give it a try? That's what I think anyway, and I feel like it might have some kind of special effect on Yuki and Arisu."
As she spoke, Amasawa Ichika rested her chin on her hand, revealing a curious look that suggested she couldn't wait to be there in person:
"I'd really like to see these two, who've been battling it out for over ten years, constantly scheming and plotting, always habitually hiding their true thoughts, get turned into a chaotic mess of 'beep beep beep beep' and 'beep beep beep'. Let's see how they'll still be so stubborn then."
Another string of censored words followed. It was fortunate that Horikita Suzune was already used to Amasawa Ichika's vulgar language, but even so, she managed to expand her thoughts slightly following the other person's words...
You know what, she seems to want to watch it too, especially Arisu's.
"Right, right?"
Seeing the thoughtful expression on Horikita Suzune's face, Amasawa Ichika also put on a smile of finding a kindred spirit:
"And let me tell you, the three of them have actually confronted each other countless times in the past, but each time it ended inconclusively, they always couldn't clear things up. So, based on my idea, Liang should call both of them over at the same time, and then—beep—beep—beep—and after that, it'll be all done, and there'll be no more unresolved issues."
After saying that, Amasawa Ichika spread her hands with a hint of regret:
"Of course, because it was indeed a bit too much, I didn't dare tell Ryo the second half of the plan. Besides, I always felt that the probability of Arisu and Yuki being willing to be together was probably even smaller than the probability of me and Suzune being together. I would like to just tie them up and take them over, but it's a pity that I might not be able to beat Yuki in a fight."
"... Why are you getting more and more carried away with your words?"
"No, not really. Besides, it's not entirely impossible. I just think that Megumi and Hiyori are a lot like that. Maybe one day they'll actually end up having a threesome."
"Ichika, you'd better stop talking about people behind their backs."
"No, that's just my reasonable speculation based on facts."
Amasawa Ichika gestured with her chin towards Horikita Suzune with a hint of displeasure:
"If Suzune doesn't believe me, how about we make a bet about this?"
"... Dream? Or reality?"
In her dormitory room, Xue shakily rubbed her forehead as she sat up from her bed. Her tone was somewhat bewildered, but her eyes were exceptionally clear, carrying a sense of realization that came after a period of vicissitude. She stared blankly at her right hand for a while before putting it down and silently getting off the bed.
She still clearly remembered every crazy moment she and Kitagawa Ryo had in her dreams—the first, the second, the third, the fourth... until the very last time.
In her final moments, she was less human and more like a beast temporarily in human form, like a cat and a dog, preoccupied with licking and moistening his entire body with her tongue, while her own body curled up in the sound of the night rain. Yet, she still looked thirsty, dry, hungry, and empty, as if all her thirst and emptiness were only for the sake of getting even an inch closer to him.
Somewhat wearily, she drew back the curtains. The sunlight outside was dazzling, like a gigantic machine roaring across her face, causing the girl to squint instinctively, as if looking at it any longer would cause her to melt away under the midday sun, just like her name. She quickly turned around, grabbed her change of clothes, and went into the bathroom.
Perhaps influenced by that fleeting dream, the snow looked as if it had just been pulled from the water, soaking wet from head to toe, muddy and desperately needing a good, refreshing shower.
Soon, the bathroom was filled with rising steam, which condensed on the walls and mirror, making the entire small space blurry.
Xue stood alone under the showerhead, looking somewhat like she was cosplaying the meme "I called you all night in the rain." However, instead of holding the showerhead in her hand like a phone, she let it sit on the shelf, letting the hot water pour down on her head and feet from above.
"... Why?"
Unconsciously, she had already squatted down there, watching the water on the bathroom floor tiles gather and rush into the drain, while muttering to herself.
For her, who had always wanted to maintain her pure and innocent nature, the series of long dreams she had today undoubtedly pierced the festering sore in her memory, revealing its bloody side to her in great detail.
Looking back now, the better 'White Room' she envisioned, and the things she wanted to do to Kitagawa Ryo in it, were essentially no different from what she herself experienced in the White Room.
They all used suggestion and even brainwashing methods in a closed environment where they couldn't contact the outside world for a long time to make the other person accept and like the concept. But the Kitagawa Ryo cultivated in this way was not the one she wanted at all. So in the end, all that was left was lust and desire for that identical body, and all spiritual comfort was abandoned.
They should have established their connection and bond on a spiritual level, not a physical one, so this is putting the cart before the horse.
Perhaps it's just like that saying goes:
She liked the bird so much that she wanted to put it in a cage, but she suspected that the bird didn't want to stay in the cage.
But when time rewinds, and she finally has the chance to put the unhatched egg into the cage ahead of time, making this little space his whole world, she is dismayed to find that he can no longer grow into the way she wants him to be.
After a while, Xue stood up, leaning against the wall, dried herself with a towel, and stood in front of the fogged mirror. She used her hands to gently polish her blurry reflection back to its original shine.
Her hair wasn't silver-white; it was still a brownish-beige, but she suddenly felt it looked much better.
Whether she was venting some emotion or simply had a desire to paint, Xue casually picked up a lipstick from the vanity, twisted out the glaze, pressed it hard against the mirror, and swiped it to the right, leaving a bright red mark.
When Xue finally came to her senses, she discovered that she had written her and Liang's names on the bathroom mirror with lipstick. There were still no surnames, just two simple single-character names, which stood out clearly on the transparent and colorless mirror.
However, it wasn't the red of fresh blood.
Xue carefully put the lipstick away again.
After all, it's a rose red shade.
Get dressed and dry your hair.
My body feels like it's being urged to do something immediately, but my brain seems to be deliberately slowing down its pace.
Only after she had completely tidied herself up did Xue pick up her phone. On the homepage of the campus forum, posts about Kitagawa Ryo and Sakayanagi Arisu had been pushed to the top of the trending list.
"Being with Arisu..."
After muttering this to herself, Xue left her room without heading towards the Keyaki Mall mentioned in the post. Instead, she went straight to the second-year dormitory building next to her own dormitory building.
Just as Sakayanagi Arisu had been observing her, Yuki was also closely watching Sakayanagi Arisu's every move during the two days Kitagawa Ryo was away from school.
Therefore, compared to Keyaki Mall.
She preferred to make her first stop at Sakayanagi Arisu's dormitory room.
Chapter Thirty-Eight: One, Two, Three, Let's Do It Again
Gabriel García Márquez once wrote the following passage in his novel * One Hundred Years of Solitude *:
The two men made barely a sound, at most like the soft sigh of someone gazing at the distant twilight of April through an open window. It was a fierce struggle, a desperate battle, yet it seemed unrelated to violence.
But this clearly doesn't fit the current situation between Kitagawa Ryo and Sakayanagi Arisu. If anything, Kitagawa Ryo would rather quote another passage from Gabriel García Márquez's Love in the Time of Cholera *:
"With a wicked tenderness, she dismembered him piece by piece, sprinkling him with salt, pepper, a clove of garlic, a bay leaf, and chopped onions and lemon juice to her liking, marinating him in the dish until just right. The stove was already set to the perfect temperature, everything was ready, and there was no one else in the house."
However, this isn't entirely accurate, because according to this description, he would be an extremely inept cook, since all the ingredients in his hands had been ruined in the pot.
I don't know if it's due to simple physiological stimulation, psychological pressure, or both.
In short, after the first round between the two, Sakayanagi Arisu either genuinely fainted or pretended to, which even made Kitagawa Ryo feel a bit complicated. He increasingly felt that the "little devil" attribute that Kitagawa had joked about before might actually manifest in Arisu. This kind of performance, with its pre-match boasts, incoherent talk during the match, and silence afterward, was, in a sense, too classic.
Because he possessed a natural talent for medicine and had genuinely and systematically learned relevant knowledge in two simulations, Kitagawa Ryo was able to determine after a brief examination that Sakayanagi Arisu was not seriously injured. It was probably because she hadn't had much rest recently and was performing such an operation while physically and mentally exhausted.
However, he still hadn't received a clear answer to the series of questions he had asked earlier Sakayanagi Arisu. Perhaps because he was asking questions while constantly moving around, all he could hear in the end were mostly meaningless interjections and particles, without any useful information.
Just as Kitagawa Ryo was starting to worry that Amasawa Ichika's method might indeed be unreliable, there was a sudden knock on the door of Sakayanagi Arisu's dormitory room.
It has to be said that, judging from the scene inside, it was a perfect example of "dating that is not in line with the standards of a high school student" in the ANHS School Rules. Therefore, without knowing who had come, Kitagawa Ryo did not answer immediately.
However, the person outside didn't keep him waiting long; soon, he heard a familiar voice:
"I know you and Ryo are inside, Arisu."
It's snow.
To avoid the other party spouting those familiar lines like "You dare to steal my man? Then open the door!", Kitagawa Ryo quickly threw on a coat and strode to the entrance, opening the door.
As soon as the door opened, the first thing Yuki saw was Kitagawa Ryo, who was completely disheveled, followed by a certain scent that she had smelled countless times in the dream she had just ended—a scent she knew all too well.
Kitagawa Ryo had expected Yuki to say something sarcastic or teasing again, but to his surprise, she simply went into the room quietly, closed the door, and then slowly peeked inside, where she saw Sakayanagi Arisu posture and appearance were equally disheveled.
"No wonder it was so quiet. I thought Arisu was okay with being disturbed at times like this."
Without the slightest hint of shyness or unease, Xue casually lifted a corner of the blanket on the bed and sat down confidently. It was clear that she had just taken a shower; her hair was not completely dry and still had some moisture remaining, and her body temperature was higher than usual.
"But Liang is really carefree, letting me in so easily. Did she really think I'd do something outrageous if she locked me out? If I were, I would have done it on the first day of school when I was stuck at your door with the security chain."
As she spoke, Yuki took off her shoes and moved completely next to Sakayanagi Arisu, giving her a shrug and then nodding at Kitagawa Ryo who was walking over.
"How was it? Did you feel more comfortable with your first time with her, or with mine?"
Kitagawa Ryo simply shook his head, frankly expressing his true feelings:
"To be honest, it's all terrible."
"Whether it's you or Arisu."
Although he knew that due to Yuki's own cognitive biases and embellished memories, what happened between the two of them in his dormitory room during the Cultural Festival had probably become something else entirely, he still spoke the truth in this rare and terrible Matoba in every sense of the word.
"Regarding my assessment... I don't deny it."
To Kitagawa Ryo's surprise, Sakayanagi Arisu, who sat there with her legs stretched out as if to compare her proportions with the ragged Sakayanagi Arisu, readily admitted it.
After being bombarded by dreams today, Xue finally realized many things, as if the thick veil that had always shrouded her memories had been lifted. Many things that she had taken for granted in the past suddenly became strange in her eyes, including the first time that Kitagawa Ryo was telling her about now.
As the new candidate to surpass Amasawa Ichika and ascend to the throne of the X-field god by taking advantage of the dream, Xue knows very well what kind of scene happened between her and Kitagawa Ryo during last year's Cultural Festival.
It's safe to say that even if it weren't Ichinose Honami, probably no girl who has feelings for Kitagawa Ryo would easily accept her.
Although Xue always believed she understood herself, she only realized how capable she was of doing such a thing after the veil of her beautiful facade was torn away, and realized that she was truly like this.
What should have been a joyful and pleasurable experience seemed to turn into nothing but pain and discomfort in her actions. It was as if she couldn't be truly satisfied without the aid of bloodshed, biting herself to create wounds and then licking them herself.
It's astonishing that the same person's demeanor could transform into two completely different appearances within a minute. It's as if, thirty seconds ago, she was the master of the other person, recklessly leaving her mark and bright red wounds on him, and then thirty seconds later, she couldn't wait to fasten the chains and shackles around her own neck, eagerly, impatiently, ingratiatingly, and desperately trying to comfort him.
In fact, her behavior that time had no regularity in terms of timing; there was no concept of the first thirty seconds and the last thirty seconds. She was simply venting like a patient without any rationality.
This was definitely a devastating experience for the man, but even so, Kitagawa Ryo was patient and gentle with her throughout the day, cooperating with her role-playing without any annoyance until he completely calmed her down.
"It must have been a really bad experience for Liang."
Having seemingly finished her Sakayanagi Arisu, Yuki curled her legs back up, sat on the edge of the bed with her knees drawn up to her chest, and looked at Kitagawa Ryo, as if speaking to him, or perhaps simply talking to herself:
"Actually, I've always felt that my views on pain and pleasure are a bit strange. Why don't you bite me a few times, Liang? Anywhere is fine, whether it's on my arm or neck. Anyway, it's spring now, and clothes can cover up pretty well."
"I don't have the habit of biting, pinching, scratching, or clawing people."
Kitagawa Ryo shook his head in refusal. For some reason, he felt that what Yuki had just said was a bit of a bait, and not something she meant sincerely.
"Then forget it."
Upon hearing this, Xue withdrew her outstretched, fair and delicate arm. After hesitating for a moment, she got up from the bed and began to take off her clothes, which startled Kitagawa Ryo.
"Hello--"
"Hmm? What's wrong?"
The girl tilted her head in confusion, then looked at Sakayanagi Arisu beside her who seemed to still be unconscious, before stepping barefoot off the bed.
"Ryo feels the bed isn't big enough, right? Well, that makes sense, since Arisu is still resting here. So, Ryo, where would you like to go?"
"On the sofa? Holding onto the bedpost? In front of the desk? In front of the mirror in the bathroom? Or in the kitchen or entryway?"
"Stop."
Kitagawa Ryo gestured for him to stop, feeling that even though it had only been a few days, he already couldn't quite understand what Yuki was thinking.
After conveniently passing the buck to Hotaru, Kitagawa Ryo looked back at Yuki, who was already half-undressed, completely unaffected by the romantic atmosphere, and earnestly asked her the same question that Sakayanagi Narimori had asked Arisu earlier that day:
What are Xue's true thoughts right now?
"Now?"
"Yes, now."
"If I really had to say something, it would be that I wanted to make up for the time I was cold."
"What compensation?"