Chapter 1: Voldemort, I'm the Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor!
In the middle of the North Sea stood a lone, jagged island.
Its rugged black rocks resembled eroded spines, grotesquely jutting through the churning, ink-black sea.
Azkaban Prison sprawled across it. Its dark gray towers were coarse and cold, spearing the low, leaden sky like pale skeletal hands struggling to claw their way above the water.
The storm raged without end, lashing the reefs with salty, biting seawater. The waves broke into ghastly white foam and crashed hard against the cold walls.
In the narrow corridor outside the iron-barred cells, despair froze into frost, shadows writhed soundlessly, and Dementors sucked away happiness amid the prisoners' mad howls.
The cell in a corner by the shore was the only exception.
Sirius lay rigidly on his back, numb as a corpse. Only the faint rise and fall of his chest proved he was still alive.
"Haah—" A sudden gasp made him turn his head sharply.
It was an oriental-looking man dressed like a Muggle, with strong features and perfectly defined muscles.
Even Sirius had to admit that he was stunningly handsome, though the man was pale and covered in cold sweat at that moment.
"How did you get to Azkaban?" Sirius asked.
His words seemed to trigger some sort of keyword.
"No! No one can judge me! Screw you, God!"
The man spoke in words Sirius couldn't understand. A black cloak visibly enveloped him, and in an instant the entire cell was covered in ice and snow. The cloaked figure passed through the wall and plunged into the sea.
"He disappeared again. Why did I say 'again'?" Sirius stared at the empty cell, thinking he was probably going mad.
Outside Hogsmeade stood a lush, peaceful estate.
Its gentle, verdant slopes rose like a spreading velvet blanket, tenderly cradling honey-colored stone walls.
Madam Rosmerta's home basked in the landscape, its red-tiled roof gleaming like honey beneath the nearly transparent blue sky.
The sun poured down without end, generously bathing the vast, neatly trimmed lawn. Every blade of grass was lush and green, sparkling with flecks of gold.
Through the open windows, the warm breeze gently lifted the white curtains, letting them billow as it brought the whispers of autumn and the lilting calls of birds.
Li Lin lay on his side, resting against a soft arm. A woman used his pale golden curls like a paintbrush, teasingly tracing them over his tall nose. Her blue eyes were full of tender affection.
"Stop it, Rosmerta," Li Lin mumbled. "I have an interview today."
Her curvy body pressed against his back. The dry, soft bed, fresh after a Scourgify, only deepened his sleepiness and made him reluctant to wake.
"Do you have to go to work?"
"If I don't, are you going to support me?"
"I'll support you."
Li Lin lost all trace of sleepiness and immediately got up.
His gaze lingered on her long, fair legs for just an instant before he walked into the washroom.
"Darling, you're just as radiant today." A voice like silver bells came from the mirror.
Li Lin looked at his haggard reflection. "I, Li Lin, have been ruined by wine and women. Look how haggard I am. From this day forth... I quit drinking!"
It had been three years since he escaped Azkaban and started living off Madam Rosmerta.
He was twenty-one now. He wasn't young anymore.
Even now, he still remembered what the driver of the truck that hit him had played: "We're all doing our best to live."
Ninety-nine deaths in Azkaban.
The cause of death had been monotonous: kissed to death by Dementors.
The deaths themselves had been harrowing: Sirius had killed him in all sorts of inventive ways.
Every time, Sirius managed to attract the Dementors' attention in a different way.
Still... the inside of a Dementor's stomach was surprisingly warm. It even contained the memories of the souls it had devoured.
As it happened, whenever Li Lin returned from death, his body and soul retained everything they had accumulated.
At last, on his ninetieth death, he gained magic. On his ninety-seventh, he successfully transformed into a Dementor. On his ninety-ninth, he managed to cross the North Sea without changing back into his original form and drowning halfway there, reaching Hogsmeade.
However, this had also made him completely Non-Existent.
Li Lin pulled himself out of his memories and drew his Yew Wand, pointing it at himself. "Avada Kedavra!"
With the sound of something enormous rushing through the air, a flash of green light streaked by, and his haggardness vanished.
This wasn't a death reset. It was a case of two negatives making a positive.
He was Non-Existence, living Dark Magic. Curses were his food. Neither alive nor dead, he was Non-Existence, existing forever.
As a half-wizard, he had a feeling that in three years he would stop developing, and time would freeze him in place forever.
But that didn't mean he couldn't be restrained or driven away.
As an immortal aberration, no matter how careful he was, the passage of infinite time would make the probability of danger approach one hundred percent.
He needed the ability to return from death. He needed to grow stronger.
Hogwarts, ancient and full of magical knowledge, and the position of Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor, burdened with a curse from the strongest Dark wizard, were his best choice.
In the Hog's Head Inn, Li Lin steeled his resolve.
Across from him sat the strongest wizard of this age, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore.
The seemingly ordinary, slovenly bartender, with his strong scent of goat, was the equally extraordinary brother of this great white wizard.
"May I ask what I should call you?" the greatest white wizard asked. "Madam Rosmerta's exotic boyfriend, Robin Hood of Knockturn Alley, Bane of Dark wizards, Batman Bruce Wayne, or Li Lin?"
Without any visible movement, his voice was confined to this small space.
Only the Dumbledore brothers and Li Lin could hear it.
"Your future Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor," Li Lin said calmly.
"What makes you think I'll hire you?" Dumbledore asked. "You want me to pass over Quirinus. To qualify for the post, he spent a year gaining practical experience. He's been to the most dangerous Albanian Forest, a vampire's lair, and a Giant camp."
Li Lin took a Shrike out of his pocket and lowered his head to suck gently.
Frost instantly spread across the entire table, and the bird's transparent soul slipped into his mouth.
Li Lin's throat bobbed as he swallowed. He opened his pale gray eyes. "That's why."
The Shrike's chest still rose and fell, but it had become a living corpse.
Dumbledore was silent for a moment, then said, "You're hired."
Li Lin took the acceptance letter Dumbledore had prepared long ago.
Crack!
The instant he took it, Li Lin's figure twisted and collapsed inward, vanishing from the spot.
"Closing early today." The bartender stopped polishing his glass.
He seemed like a monarch of the dark world. At his command, the rogues and ruffians gathered in the bar dispersed one after another.
The crack of Apparition rang out without pause.
A few hotheaded youngsters who had come to the bar for a laugh started to say something when they saw this, but could only leave with their tails between their legs.
When the last customer had gone, the bloody sweat stopped oozing from the wooden sign's boar's head. The door shut, blocking out the final sliver of light.
"Albus Dumbledore, my saintly brother, are you sure you haven't gone senile? You hired a humanoid Dementor as a professor. Hogwarts is a school, not a freak show."
"Of course I understand. But he's Batman," Dumbledore said.
Chapter 2: The Dark Knight of Knockturn Alley
"I am the dark shadow. I am the embodiment of fear. I am... Batman!"
"He's elusive, appearing and disappearing without a trace. His black cloak can swallow any curse. No one knows what lies beneath that mask."
"Besides you, Harry, he's the only one who's survived the Killing Curse."
Outside Knockturn Alley, Hagrid spoke with passionate fervor.
"What're you looking at? You think I'm Batman?"
He swaggered into the alley with Harry, occasionally intimidating the Dark wizards around them. He seemed ready to kick even the trembling old woman who passed by.
"If this had been in the past, I never would've dared bring you here."
"Back then, this place was full of scum, the Pure-blood families' hired thugs, and the Wizarding World's dregs."
"It's still much the same, but the real bad eggs have all gone to Azkaban."
"We can buy plenty of cheap foreign goods here." He pointed toward a tower at the end of the alley. "It's all thanks to Batman. As soon as the lighthouse lights up and Batman's mark appears in the sky, we know he's here."
"Enough, Rubeus. He's just a criminal." Rufus Scrimgeour, former Head of the Auror Office—basically the Wizarding World's police chief—came out of Borgin and Burkes.
Harry looked up at him. He was a lionlike man. Though he limped a little and gray streaked his brown hair and eyebrows, he still looked vigorous and imposing. His golden-brown eyes flashed with a sharpness and alertness that rivaled any young man's.
"He's just a criminal," Hagrid mimicked Scrimgeour's tone. "He's just done what your Ministry of Magic should've done, but never could. I know why you hate him."
"Because you were demoted and sent to the front lines because of him."
"Is that just because of personal reasons, sir?" asked the pink-haired young woman in Auror uniform behind Scrimgeour, boldly speaking up without any regard for his higher rank or greater experience.
"Tonks, no," Scrimgeour said. His gaze couldn't help drifting toward the tower. "Because he's the hero the Wizarding World should have, but doesn't need right now, we'll arrest him. Because he can take it, because he isn't our hero. He's the silent guardian, the vigilant protector. He... is the Dark Knight."
"What Dark Knight? He's just a coward!" Mad-Eye Moody came out of the crowd.
Hagrid was about to get angry, but when he saw it was Moody, he asked in confusion, "Aren't you supposed to be on his side?"
Harry instinctively ducked behind Hagrid.
The scarred old man with a wooden leg reminded Harry of the mad scientist he'd seen on television.
No, he was even more terrifying. A coin-sized blue fake eye roamed freely in the old man's rugged face. For a moment, it even rolled into his head, leaving only the whites showing.
"Harry Potter?" The old man managed a smile worthy of a horror movie. "Good lad. When you run into danger, you know to find cover first."
"Cover?" Hagrid pressed. "Why? He's a hero!"
"If you want me to take those words back, he'd better dare mail Lucius Malfoy's head to my office," Moody snorted. "He follows that ridiculous rule against killing and believes in the law. When Voldemort was around"—gasps came from the crowd—"we Aurors were even allowed to use the Unforgivable Curses."
"But Dumbledore..."
Hagrid was cut off by Moody. "He's a coward too."
"Batman's arrival showed Albus's true colors. Fudge isn't his puppet; he's just a spineless fool who used Dumbledore's reputation to rise to power."
Harry's eyes widened. If he remembered correctly, Fudge was the Minister for Magic, the most powerful man in the British Wizarding World.
"I've only just realized Albus is simply afraid of holding power. He really only wants to be a teacher, not to handle both education and the Ministry of Magic."
"That crafty pig Fudge has made everyone think he's Dumbledore's stand-in. He writes to Albus for advice on every single policy."
"Even Scrimgeour's better than that pig Fudge."
Moody gasped for breath, preparing to take another shot at Scrimgeour.
Then excited clamoring suddenly rang out from the crowd.
"He's appeared again!"
"Who is it this time?"
"Ha!" Hagrid pumped his fist excitedly. "Look, Moody, you old fool! Take a look at who's hanging up there!"
Harry followed his gaze. It was... a lustrous pair of silver silk shorts, two hairy legs... a figure hanging upside down!
A cascade of platinum-blond hair dangled toward the ground, though there wasn't much of it.
A rich wizard with thinning hair.
Harry arrived at his conclusion, which was a little unkind.
"Lucius Malfoy," Moody recognized him.
Scrimgeour whipped out his wand and looked around. "Stay alert! After the man hanging upside down comes the Nightfall Sin Chapter, and then... Batman himself."
But he was the only one on alert.
Neither Tonks nor Moody, who'd called Batman a coward, made a move.
The Aurors merely drew their wands as a formality, looking more like tourists in Knockturn Alley.
The Dark wizards looked around warily, but their eyes were filled with fear and a hint of admiration.
Harry was just about to ask what the Nightfall Sin Chapter was when darkness spread from the top of the tower. It was as if someone had spilled ink across the sky's canvas.
The ink stopped at the border between Knockturn Alley and Diagon Alley, creating a strange scene of alternating light and shadow.
Then came the neat sound of fabric tearing, followed by the appearance of one red star after another.
They were bats, flapping their wings!
The cloud of bats gathered atop the tower, and a dark figure appeared.
An elegant top hat, a billowing cloak, a well-tailored suit, gloves, shoes, and a cane—all black enough to swallow light.
The visible lower half of his face was pale, with teeth white as snow flashing behind his parted lips.
He seemed to possess some strange magic. The moment he appeared, everyone fell silent and held their breath.
Scrimgeour futilely raised his wand. "Stupefy!"
The red spellbeam made everyone nearby's scalps prickle, but the darkness swallowed it.
The Lord of Darkness calmly took a black piece of parchment from his robes. His movements never faltered. "Lucius Malfoy. Charged with repeatedly bribing Ministry officials, funding the terrorist organization known as the Death Eaters, and repeatedly plotting attacks against Muggles, both directly and indirectly, and against Muggle-born wizards..."
Each time he read out a charge, glowing words appeared on the tower.
The charges on the tower were clearer still, down to the time, place, location, people, and amounts of money involved.
Throughout it all, Scrimgeour kept casting spells, but every one was swallowed by the darkness.
The Lord of Darkness still made no move. Only when he had finished reading and the parchment had burned away did he bow slightly, then step back and disappear into the bats as they beat their wings once more.
The darkness vanished. Scrimgeour dropped to his knees in the light, the reflection from his silk underwear shining across his sweat-soaked face.
Thunderous applause erupted in Knockturn Alley.
Chapter 3: The Court of Owls
"If it were Fudge the ostrich, he'd just bury his head in the sand in his office and pretend he couldn't see a thing," Moody snorted. "The Aurors need more men like Scrimgeour."
"Is Dumbledore still unwilling to act?" Scrimgeour struggled to his feet.
"A free magic show that doesn't violate the International Statute of Secrecy, and even punishes evil along the way. Why stop it?" Moody raised an eyebrow. "Don't look at me. Those were Albus's exact words."
"What were you busy with just now?"
"Putting on a magic show. The assistant wasn't very cooperative, so it took me a little time to bring him over."
At 18A on the south side of Diagon Alley stood the headquarters of Obscurus Books.
Li Lin had changed into a forget-me-not-blue wizard's robe. His ink-black hair was slightly disheveled, but he still looked as dashing as ever.
A bald wizard sat across from him.
"Coming here was a waste of time, wasn't it?" Li Lin raised an eyebrow, his tone confrontational. "You should understand what a great honor it is for you to publish my book."
"I chose you because you've worked with Newt and have experience publishing Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them."
"You know how much profit there is in a textbook for a non-elective Hogwarts course."
"But now, just because the Trimble Family pressured you, you've lost your nerve and wasted my precious time."
The bald wizard wiped away his cold sweat. "But the Trimble Family has a seat on the Hogwarts Board of Governors, and Quentin Trimble, author of The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection, even served as Hogwarts Headmaster."
"This book has been used as the textbook for Defense Against the Dark Arts for hundreds of years."
"Even when past professors added their own books to the curriculum, they never removed this one."
"Enough. It's just that the profits aren't good enough," Li Lin retorted. "You think I'll only be here for one term, and that my textbook, Defense Against the Dark Arts: Three Years of Fundamentals, Four Years of Practice Exams, is only one volume, with no separate editions for each year, and is very cheap."
"Since you know..."
"The Trimble Family won't object anymore," Li Lin cut off the bald wizard. "We both know where the objections are really coming from: the Humanoid Alliance."
"Goblins, Centaurs, Veela, merpeople from saltwater habitats, Giants... Those are the races that can truly threaten wizards and are legally recognized as people, yet they've never really appeared in Defense Against the Dark Arts textbooks, no matter the country or language."
"But my book is different."
"You just wanted to bargain with me, thinking I was some clueless young fool."
"Since you..." "The Humanoid Alliance won't object either," Li Lin interrupted him again. "They think I'll only be here for one year. All right, time's up. I should be going."
Li Lin stepped into the fireplace, its flames swaying green. When he reappeared, he was in an upstairs guest room at the Leaky Cauldron, where another Li Lin was already waiting.
The Li Lin who emerged from the fireplace turned into a shadow and slid along the floor, merging into the Li Lin opposite him.
"Good. Fufu. I hope the Humanoid Alliance can find a way to kill me, too," Li Lin said with a laugh. "Too bad even Voldemort can't kill me. Maybe he's just too weak."
At the headquarters of Obscurus Books was a Lethifold, another being of Non-Existence that could only be driven away by the Patronus Charm, not destroyed.
While searching for a way to kill himself, Li Lin had forcibly fused with it and gained the ability to control darkness, as well as the ability to split off a clone.
His ability to absorb fear and transform into countless forms came from a Boggart, a being of Non-Existence that could only be driven away by the Riddikulus Charm.
Along with the magical knowledge he'd acquired at Azkaban University, these powers had made him the so-called bane of Dark Magic, a Dark Knight who punished evil and upheld justice.
Even so, he couldn't completely control the course of a battle.
He recalled the fight at Gringotts. Voldemort truly deserved to be called the strongest Dark wizard—not some fool who just cackled and cast the Killing Curse.
Even using Quirrell's body, Li Lin had witnessed all kinds of curses, many of which he couldn't even name.
A curse that made the heart pound violently until it burst.
A curse that used one's gaze as a medium to burn the eyeballs and even the brain.
A curse that sacrificed the caster's own blood to strengthen its power.
A curse that warped the air and eroded the opponent's life.
A curse that used shadows as a medium: Shadow Tag.
But none of those curses together was as terrifying as the Love Charm flowing in Harry's blood.
Against Harry, Quirrell and Voldemort could only restrain him with spells that wouldn't endanger his life, strangle him directly with their hands, or kill him by using a spell like Avada Kedavra that had no countercurse and could pierce nonphysical magic.
Li Lin recalled the brief glimpse he'd caught in Knockturn Alley. "It can kill me."
"Is the magic of love my bane, too?"
"Ridiculous. Am I the Dark Lord, or is Voldemort?"
"So now..." Li Lin tapped his index finger against the table. "All I have to do is wait for term to start."
"Term?" The window opened, and a pink-haired girl sprang through the air with feline agility. Her black-stockinged legs bent as she leaped, then she twisted and landed in Li Lin's arms. She wrapped them around his neck. "Is my Dark Knight a professor now?"
She batted her big eyes. "Then who would you like as your teaching assistant today, Professor? Narcissa Malfoy?"
Her hair turned pale gold, her skin grew pale, her eyes turned light blue, her lips thinned, and her chin became less rounded. Her plump calves, toned with healthy muscle, grew slender...
"Nymphadora Tonks." Li Lin lowered his head. "My Catwoman."
The girl's breathing quickened. Her pink, bubblegum-like curls blossomed like her heart.
It was almost like a memetic infection. When the girl, furious at the Ministry of Magic's injustice, was preparing to join the seemingly defunct Order of the Phoenix, she met the Dark Knight and chose Catwoman as her codename.
"Catwoman, the Bat's ranks have grown again."
In a hall like an ancient Roman arena, the Pure-bloods murmured among themselves.
"Malfoy's been caught, after Crabbe and Goyle."
"Who'll be next?"
"We have to take action."
"Dark Magic doesn't work on him. We can use White Magic."
"White Magic? We can't even use the spells that truly count as White Magic."
"Umbridge can. She can cast the Patronus Charm."
"That's because she thinks she's in the right."
"Who's willing to risk having a spell backfire and kill them?"
"Isn't Draco Malfoy there? We can groom him to become a Light Knight."
"Come to think of it, doesn't the Bat want to punish evil and uphold order? We can groom another person, someone who just wants to watch the world burn. A lunatic."
"Voldemort was enough. We need another one?"
"This time, we don't need to find a genius. Just a lunatic who creates chaos within the rules. How about calling him the Joker?"
"Maybe we can bring in Muggles, too. Then Dumbledore won't be able to sit by and do nothing. I have a laboratory in the Muggle World, and a few freaks have just been born there. I call them Mr. Freeze and Scarecrow."
"Don't forget the Scourers who hate wizards, either—the assassin codenamed Deathstroke."
"Maybe we can bring in the Humanoid Alliance as well. I have a Half-blood Giant named Bane working for me."
"Why don't we come up with a name for our organization, too?"
"The Court of Owls."
"We are the true rulers of this world, and the Bat's natural enemy is the owl."
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