The Foolish Child and Nine Dragons Pulling a Coffin (A 5,000-Character Mega Chapter)

Registration for public primary schools in Junsha has already begun. Parents should only need to prepare the required materials to register, but there have been instances of people queuing overnight outside many primary schools.

Parents' hearts are always full of love and worry.

However, times have changed, and the way things are handled and dealt with must also change. The older generation's mindset and ideas are not keeping up with the times.

For example, primary school registration in Junsha now uses online pre-registration and on-site registration confirmation. The education department has repeatedly emphasized and confirmed that eligible children within the school district will be enrolled, and the class schedule is randomly generated by computer. However, some parents still believe that if they queue up all night, then they must be given the best and highest priority, otherwise they will prepare to make a scene with their whole family.

Furthermore, some individuals with ulterior motives spread information such as the limited number of places, the saturation of first grade, and contracts signed with real estate developers, causing anxiety among parents registering their children.

Zhou Shuling had already registered online. The registration for first grade was divided into categories such as "having household registration and house, having household registration but no house, having house but no household registration, and having neither house nor household registration". Zhou Dongdong's household registration had always been here, and now they had bought a house and completed the transfer procedures, so the registration went smoothly. However, Zhou Shuling still felt uneasy, so she went to a well-regarded and very popular private primary school to try registering.

Private elementary school admissions are not guaranteed for everyone; entrance exams are mandatory. Unsurprisingly, Zhou Dongdong was happily eliminated during the entrance exam.

"You really have nothing better to do." Liu Chang'an said, carrying groceries, as Zhou Shuling rambled on about how difficult it was to get into primary school.

"I can go back to first grade when I'm older!" Zhou Dongdong said excitedly, carrying his empty schoolbag.

"Why don't you grow up and go back into my belly? I want to be born again." Zhou Shuling hated the way the elementary school teacher in charge of the entrance exam looked at her with pity. At the time, she was naturally proud and disdainful, but she would definitely beat Zhou Dongdong when she got home.

"You don't have a husband anymore, how will you have a baby?" Zhou Dongdong asked curiously, but also with a slight sense of relief. "If another me were born, would I still be this powerful?"

"What's so great about you?" Liu Chang'an couldn't see it at all. "Eating three bowls in one meal is your best skill, isn't it?"

"Yes!"

"That pig can eat a whole bathtubful in one meal; pigs are much more powerful than you."

"Really?!" Zhou Dongdong's eyes widened in disbelief.

Zhou Shuling sighed, "Today, the other children had talent shows—singing, dancing, crosstalk, painting, harmonica playing, and all sorts of things... I asked her to perform a dance too, but as soon as she stepped onto the stage, she forgot all about it. She pulled two dates out of her pocket and told the teacher she wanted to perform while eating two dates at the same time."

"I've been waiting so long, I'm hungry..." Zhou Dongdong reached into her pockets and rummaged through them. She'd finished all the dates. When you're hungry, all you can think about is food, isn't that natural?

"That won't do." Liu Chang'an shook his head at Zhou Shuling. "Eating two dates at the same time is dangerous, Zhou Dongdong. Next time, you have to perform eating two steamed buns at the same time."

"I really love this kind of performance!"

Zhou Shuling was so angry that she punched Liu Chang'a Zhou Dongdong once each.

Back home, Zhou Shuling told Liu Chang'an not to cook, took the groceries Liu Chang'an had bought, and prepared to go to the kitchen.

Of course, Zhou Shuling doesn't really only cook crayfish; she just likes to eat crayfish, so her late-night snacks are mostly crayfish.

During the meal, Zhou Dongdong brought a basin to serve rice, wanting to prove herself, but was scolded by Zhou Shuling. She had no choice but to eat three bowls and then felt that she wasn't impressive at all.

Liu Chang'an saw packed boxes in the living room. Zhou Shuling said they were winter clothes, which had been packed up first.

Liu Chang'an accepted fifty yuan, then helped move Zhou Shuling and Zhou Dongdong's winter clothes upstairs. He checked the almanac and found that tomorrow was an auspicious day, so they agreed to move tomorrow.

Zhou Shuling really wanted to say that a family can't function without a man, and that she was lucky to have met Liu Chang'an. However, after looking at Liu Chang'an, she realized that he was no longer the naive young man she had first met, so she couldn't bring herself to say it. After all, they were both adults, and saying such a thing would inevitably have a somewhat ambiguous meaning. Since they got along well, she had to be careful not to make things awkward, lest he feel uncomfortable about something.

"Brother Chang'an, now that we've moved upstairs, will you move in here too?" Zhou Dongdong asked expectantly.

Liu Chang'an thought for a moment and nodded.

"Then I'll jump around in my room from now on, and if you hear me, come find me to play!"

I'll beat you up as soon as I come up here.

I hid under the bed.

"Then your mother will beat you up."

Why do they all have to hit me?!

"Yes, so pitiful."

Zhou Dongdong thought for a moment, sniffled, and hummed twice as if she felt sorry for herself and cried. However, Zhou Dongdong was not really scared, because Brother Chang'an only talked. Apart from patting her bottom, he would never actually hit Zhou Dongdong like her mother would, making her scream.

Zhou Shuling squeezed three glasses of juice, and Zhou Dongdong immediately took the juice and sat on a small stool to drink it quietly.

"Give me two hundred yuan, and I'll treat someone to a meal and help you sort out Zhou Dongdong's schooling." Liu Chang'an shook his head, watching Zhou Dongdong intently drinking her juice.

"Great!" Zhou Shuling was overjoyed. Although she had always thought that anyone who could tamper with something like a primary school degree was an extremely powerful person, how could Liu Chang'an, a high school student, get it done for just two hundred yuan? Most people would find it unbelievable. If it were true, there would be plenty of people willing to pay twenty thousand or even two hundred thousand yuan. But a high school student for two hundred yuan? Apart from Zhou Shuling, no one would believe it.

Zhou Shuling immediately sent a red envelope to Liu Chang'an, sitting upright with her hands on her knees, watching expectantly as Liu Chang'an received the red envelope.

Liu Chang'an made a phone call to Qin Yanan.

The call was answered after a while.

"Cousin," Liu Chang'an said earnestly, after all, he was asking for a favor, "Zhou Dongdong is about to start elementary school. Could you please find the best school near our neighborhood? The key is to speak to the teacher; I hope it's a gentle, patient homeroom teacher who won't mistreat students with poor grades."

There was no sound on the other end of the phone.

Just as Liu Chang'an was wondering what was going on, he heard the echo, "Okay."

Her voice was low, and it was impossible to tell if she was expressing any emotion, but it was clearly different from Qin Yanan's usual self.

"You really like Zhou Dongdong?" Qin Yanan asked in a very low voice.

"I think that children who are a bit slow need more care and attention; that's the essence of social fairness. She can still be properly educated; we can't give up on her so early."

"I'm clever..." Zhou Dongdong finished her juice and instinctively retorted when she heard the words "stupid child," but Zhou Shuling immediately covered her mouth to stop her from interrupting Liu Chang'an's phone call. Zhou Shuling was nervously hoping that things would go smoothly.

"Okay, could you send me her name and her ID number from her household registration booklet?"

Liu Chang'an gestured to Zhou Shuling, Zhou Shuling quickly took out her household registration booklet from her bag on the sofa. Liu Chang'an then read the number to Qin Yanan.

"Okay, wait for my good news." Qin Yanan was about to hang up the phone.

"I'll treat you to dinner; I'll cook."

"Good."

Liu Chang'an hung up the phone, his emotions slightly affected. People are always most easily influenced by habits. He was used to Qin Yanan's tone and emotions when she spoke to him, and now her change was affecting Liu Chang'an... It seems that he is still somewhat dazed and easily mixes Qin Yanan's and Ye Sijin's feelings together. Otherwise, Liu Chang'an would not have noticed the attitude of ordinary people at all.

What's going on? Liu Chang'an put down his phone and started drinking his juice.

"Is that all?" Zhou Shuling picked up Zhou Dongdong, it was really hard work.

"No problem, she knows people in the education department. She found a nearby elementary school for her convenience."

Zhou Dongdong opened her mouth, staring blankly at Liu Chang'an, "I'm going to be locked up in an elementary school!"

Liu Chang'an continued to nod.

How could this happen? Mingming failed to register for school, her mother even said she wanted to put her back in her belly, Mingming wanted to wait until she was older to go to primary school, and she was already looking forward to the wonderful childhood of sitting on a small stool under the sycamore tree, feeding loaches. How could things suddenly change?

Childbirth is so difficult.

After finishing his juice, Liu Chang'an went downstairs, packed his things, and planned to move upstairs himself after Zhou Shuling moved tomorrow, depending on the situation.

His belongings mainly consisted of a few sets of clothes, some daily utensils and tools, pots and pans, kitchen utensils, and the rest were books that he had accumulated over time.

After finishing tidying up, it was already past midnight. Liu Chang'an walked out of the room, looked around, and felt that both Mrs. Karnstein and the Third Mistress seemed to have quieted down for a while.

At least it seems there aren't any people watching us in the neighborhood anymore; it must be the words I wrote on the utility pole that had an effect.

Perhaps there were other reasons, but Liu Chang'an wasn't particularly concerned.

He went to check inside the carriage as usual. The coffin seemed to be peaceful and dignified, unlike the ghost story-filled feeling it initially had. It was fine even without the hen, and it ate as usual even with the hen. It seemed very easy to take care of, and it even had a bit of the composure of a harem empress.

"Dan Dan, something happened last night that confirmed the coffin's magical properties," Liu Chang'an exclaimed softly. "Have you heard the story of the Nine Dragons Pulling a Coffin?"

Shangguan Dandan had naturally never heard of it.

"Life is the greatest miracle in the world. In the vast universe and the boundless starry sky, many people speculate that Earth may be the only source of life... Speaking of which, on June 11, 2010, outside the International Space Station, in the cold and dark universe, nine enormous objects lay motionless, as if they had been there since time immemorial, evoking a sense of endless desolation and antiquity. Those were actually nine dragon corpses!"

"Exactly like the dragon in mythology."

"Each dragon corpse is a hundred meters long, with a thick black iron chain bound to its tail, leading to the dark space behind the nine dragon corpses, where a twenty-meter-long bronze coffin hangs silently."

Liu Chang'an paused here, "Of course, I know that your coffin wasn't pulled by nine dragons. Although, given your status and the story of the emperor slaying the dragon in our traditional culture, having nine dragons pulling your coffin wouldn't be considered disproportionate to your status, the key point is that, based on my experience, it's very regrettable that the dragons of mythology don't exist on this earth."

Liu Chang'an gently stroked the painted decorations on the coffin. The dragon patterns on it were simple in line but exaggerated in shape, and quite imposing.

"Alright, let's continue the story of the Nine Dragons Pulling a Coffin... The giant bronze coffin is simple and unadorned, with some blurred ancient patterns on it, full of the vicissitudes of time, and who knows how many years it has been floating in the universe..."

Liu Chang'an stopped after finishing the first chapter of the novel. "Alright, next we'll talk about political science. For you, political science is a required subject. Karl Marx said that philosophers have only interpreted the world in various ways; the point, however, is to change it... That's why Marx is the top philosopher, while other philosophers are generally a level below him..."

"You told the story of the Nine Dragons Pulling a Coffin..."

Shangguan Dandan's voice finally rang out again in the carriage after a month.

"Then tell me first what's going on with this coffin. Don't try to fool me with some kind of soul-sealing or soul-burying ritual. Maybe it's related, but it's definitely not the reason why it can absorb blood and life force, or even prevent other people's flesh and blood from decaying and reshape life." Liu Chang'an didn't expect that his sudden inspiration would actually arouse Shangguan Dandan's curiosity and desire to hear a story.

Little girls love listening to stories.

Shangguan Dandan certainly knows more about coffins than Liu Chang'an, but it's impossible for her to know everything. He naturally used the story of Nine Dragons Pulling a Coffin to evoke her imagination.

"This is my baby."

"Your treasure? A coffin, and it's become your treasure? Is it the kind of treasure where I call your name and you dare to answer? Oh right, I haven't told you about Journey to the West. Is this coffin one of those treasures used by immortals?"

Shangguan Dandan didn't say anything more, which didn't surprise Liu Chang'an, but he felt a little regretful.

Of course, he wouldn't tell her the story of the Nine Dragons Pulling a Coffin anymore. Liu Chang'an continued talking about political science, "If everyone could have their own wishes fulfilled, then perhaps there would be no such thing as politics in this world. People have too many different understandings of politics, but no matter which understanding you prefer, you must admit that politics is born from people competing, vying, even fighting with others, putting forward certain discourses to explain why their choices and actions are legitimate, while others' are illegitimate. Politics can be a set of rhetoric about individual or collective interests..."

The political science stuff was naturally not as interesting as the story of the Nine Dragons Pulling a Coffin. Shangguan Dandan didn't interrupt him again, nor did she ask him to continue when he stopped.

Liu Chang'an himself was somewhat inspired. This coffin was certainly not the one pulled by the Nine Dragons Pulling a Coffin, but perhaps there were some similarities?

So Liu Chang'an went to read a novel. Reading a little online novel before bed is a very comfortable thing. Reading a little every day is beneficial for keeping his mind active and his body and mind happy.

The next day, after finishing his stall business and collecting fifty yuan for moving fees, Liu Chang'an changed into a tank top and shorts, draped a towel over his shoulder, and helped Zhou Shuling move.

Zhou Dongdong carried her string of firecrackers tied with broken pieces of firecrackers with cotton thread, and packed her toy chicks and other toys in her schoolbag to help with the chores.

Liu Chang'an immediately lifted the bed. Zhou Shuling wanted to help, but Liu Chang'an casually pressed her aside and she stared in disbelief as Liu Chang'an carried the huge wooden bed as nimbly as if it were Zhou Dongdong's little stool.

Men are really amazing. Many times, when women see men exert themselves to do things that women cannot, they can't help but feel admiration.

This was all extremely simple for Liu Chang'an. However, when other neighbors passed by in the building, he still had to act a bit more serious, casually turning a large bed around. Zhou Shuling and Zhou Dongdong were amazed and exclaimed, but they didn't react much else. If other normal neighbors saw this, they would inevitably be dumbfounded... It would be one thing for strangers to be dumbfounded, but for neighbors who see him every day, they would look at him suspiciously. It wasn't discreet enough.

Liu Chang'an was strong and fast, and he finished moving everything in an hour. If Zhou Dongdong hadn't been carrying a small stool on her back every now and then, which would have blocked her way on the stairs, it would have been even faster.

"You guys tidy up the house, and if you have time, could you also clean up downstairs for me? I can sell a few more bowls of noodles when I go to set up my stall," Liu Chang'an said, wiping his head with a towel.

"Of course, your house was spotless when you moved in, so you should clean it up when you leave," Zhou Shuling said matter-of-factly.

"I'll mop the floor for you!"

"Don't want."

"I can do the work!"

"Your face or your ass would be more suitable."

Am I the kind of kid who rolls around on the floor?

"Of course."

"I don't remember rolling around on the ground."

You don't even remember the things that were bad for you.

"Oh..."

Liu Chang'an went to sell rice noodles.

Business was still good. Some people complained about setting up their stall so late today, but thankfully they came back to check. After eating this bowl of noodles this morning, I felt like my day was finally complete.

Liu Chang'an was very satisfied; this was the true meaning of good food.

Around noon, Liu Chang'an saw Qin Yanan walking gracefully towards him.

Her style was completely different today. She wasn't wearing a cheongsam anymore, nor was she as elegant and sweet as a lilac in a small town. Instead, she was wearing a fluffy A-line skirt, her legs were extremely long, and she was wearing seven-centimeter high heels. Her long hair was loose, and she had light, sparse bangs on her smooth forehead.

"You're going to become an online influencer and open a Taobao store?" Liu Chang'an glanced at Qin Yanan, who was walking over with an umbrella, and asked with slight surprise, "And use your Bentley as a backdrop to take some product photos, perfect."

"Zhou Dongdong's degree is settled, so I had Uncle Ma make a call, and then I had my father's secretary call the principal. I know you're worried that Zhou Dongdong's grades are too poor and she'll face discrimination at school... but it's inevitable that public schools value grades, so all we can do is have the teachers encourage and educate her more." Qin Yanan walked over, scanned the QR code, and said, "A bowl of noodles, with less oil in the broth."

"OK."

"How can you be so calm?" After paying, Qin Yanan looked intently at Liu Chang'an seemed as if nothing had really happened that night.

I was originally going to combine three chapters into one, but it's a thousand words short because I woke up too late today... Tomorrow is Qixi Festival (Chinese Valentine's Day), and I'll be releasing a super long chapter of Xia Hua as a thank you to everyone! Please send some love and food to Zhou Dongdong!