The banquet was proceeding smoothly, with nothing going wrong—for now, at least.
Qiangu Zhangting, the heir at the Spirit Pagoda's table, looked at his grandfather's darkened face and silently sighed.
Why bother, my foolish old geezer?
Even after licking the boots of the one he loved, all he could do was age away like an old warhorse, swallowing cup after cup of bitter wine at her grand banquet, his heart drowning in bowl after bowl of tears...
Qiangu Zhangting had tried suggesting that Qiangu Dongfeng stay home, but his grandfather had overruled his grandson, insisting that Yun Ming would be there. It was a once-in-a-lifetime chance to humiliate him.
Even if the Leng Family hadn't invited him, he would surely have caught the scent and shown up uninvited.
But he'd ended up making a fool of himself. His calculations had been wrong!
Who would've thought Yun Ming wouldn't come this time? Had falling from the world's number one to number two changed his whole outlook, turning him into a turtle who hid in his shell?
Yun Ming, you've chosen your own death!
At the Shrek table, only Ya Li and a few marginalized elders from within Shrek had been dragged in as cannon fodder.
They weren't exactly enjoying their meal, either. The only ones who had come in genuine gratitude were the Titled Douluo Ya Li had treated at Chen Yulong's wedding.
Most of the others looked on with undisguised gloating, especially the lackeys Qiangu Dongfeng had brought along. They talked recklessly at the table, though they still held back a little. Their words were unpleasant, but they were all true. They were only telling it like it was.
Ya Li silently lowered her head and ate, but the hand hidden beneath the table was clenched tight.
At the War God Temple's table, the atmosphere was solemn and heavy. The eighteen War Gods kept imitating Chen Xinjie's stern, almost artificial expression, as if someone owed them money. Not a bite of food or a drop of wine on the table had been touched.
The War Gods didn't know what had happened between Chen Xinjie and Leng Wuduan, but as mere wage slaves, following the boss's lead could never be wrong!
Chen Xinjie glanced out of the corner of his eye at Su Jiu's table. A wife drank when her husband drank—how lovey-dovey. Especially the banner he'd prepared: the little brat had used it as a napkin, then tossed it aside, looking disgusted.
Old Man Chen's expression grew even harder to bear. Since they insisted on humiliating him, he had no reason to show Leng Wuduan any courtesy. They were asking for it!
Damn it, why had that Leng kid gone back to the Tang Sect's table? He'd better wait a little longer.
Old Man Chen cast him a furtive, leering glance.
"Sister Leng, why does Old Man Chen keep staring at Brother Su?"
"Ew..."
Leng Yaozhu smiled as she peeled a Purple Jade Shrimp for Na'er and placed it in her bowl. "Little sister, when you're out and about, make sure to guard our husband well. Don't let outsiders set their sights on him, understand?"
Na'er hesitated for a few seconds, her wide eyes brimming with World-Shocking Wisdom.
A-Jiu had taught her not to agree to other people's requests lightly. She had to think them through!
What did she mean, "when you're out and about"? How far off was "when"? Hadn't they agreed it would only be for three years?
Was this another act?
Or was it...
"Ow~"
Leng Yaozhu gave Na'er a flick on the forehead, pulling her thoughts back. Na'er raised her wide eyes to look at Leng Yaozhu, confusion written all over them.
"You ungrateful little thing. If you protect A-Jiu, he'll remember your kindness and treat you twice as well. In the future, he'll take you to occasions like this without you even asking."
Leng Yaozhu's masterful bluffing made the gluttonous little girl Na'er's eyes light up in an instant. It was like hearing celestial music!
That was right. Even if their fake relationship ended someday, they'd still be friends. Helping each other out was only natural!
Na'er could fend off admirers for Old Su, and Old Su could treat Na'er to a feast. A fair trade—perfectly reasonable.
"Okay, Sister Leng, I promise! Na'er will be the firmest line of defense by Brother Su's side. I guarantee no one but you will cross this line!"
Na'er raised her right arm straight forward and upward at roughly a 45-degree angle, fingers together and palm facing down, and cried, "Qiongsang!"
"Such a good girl~"
"Ehehe~ It's only right, it's only right..."
"Vice Sect Master Zang, let me offer you a toast."
"Haha! Your Excellency Wuduan, you're too kind. I wanted to toast you first, but you were so 'busy.' Let me punish myself with a drink!"
Zang Xin raised his newly repaired right hand and downed a full cup of clear liquor. To show his sincerity, he turned the empty cup upside down, not a drop left.
"You must have something else on your mind, Your Excellency Wuduan."
The amorous Zang Xin saw right through Su Jiu's impure intentions. Of course, Su Jiu didn't mind. Since the other man had seen through him, there was no need to probe indirectly. He might as well get straight to the point.
"Then, Vice Sect Master Zang, could we speak somewhere more private?"
"I don't think I—"
"It's about you and Sect Master Cao... Vice Sect Master Zang, could we speak somewhere more private?"
Su Jiu cut Zang Xin off, successfully piquing his interest.
"Well... I suppose that's not out of the question."
Su Jiu and Zang Xin disappeared from Chen Xinjie's view. Old Man Chen couldn't hear their conversation and immediately grew displeased.
A balcony on the second floor, somewhere nearby.
"Vice Sect Master Zang, let's skip the small talk. This is about you and Sect Master Cao's lifelong happiness."
"Leng Wuduan, don't talk nonsense!"
Zang Xin's old face flushed. The old cross-dresser instantly blushed shyly, like a young cross-dresser experiencing his first love.
Clearly, bringing up the romantic entanglement between him and Cao Dezhi touched a nerve. After all, their relationship was a taboo among taboos!
At the same time, it had always been his greatest wish. To have the world accept them, to be with the person he loved most and receive everyone's blessings—wouldn't that be one of life's greatest joys?
"Heh~ Vice Sect Master Zang, your heart's in a flutter. Looks like today isn't the right time to discuss this..."
Su Jiu played the card called "playing hard to get." After leaving him with those words, he turned to go.
But the amorous Zang Xin fell for it. He immediately called Su Jiu back, gritted his teeth, and offered an astronomical reward.
"One hundred-thousand-year-old Immortal Herb. I'll keep my word!"
"Haha! Vice Sect Master Zang, no need to stand on ceremony! Since you've gone this far, I, Leng, can't keep anything up my sleeve either."
"After all, I, Leng, love nothing more than bringing people together. Haha!"
Seeing that he'd gotten what he wanted and successfully scored an Immortal Herb for free, Su Jiu revealed the secret of Gender-Swap Valley.
"Your love for Sect Master Cao is as clear as heaven and earth, witnessed by Sea God Tang San, discerned by God of Emotion Dai Yuhao, and deeply moving to me, Leng."
"Universe Inquiry Valley requires the sacrifice of something truly deep and sincere. Of course, sacrificing a pair of human lovers is against the natural order. Vice Sect Master Zang, you could try animals that stay together for life instead..."
Zang Xin froze. He knew of Universe Inquiry Valley. In fact, the Tang Sect's secret records documented every detail of the time when the Shrek Seven Devils of that generation, led by Dai Yuhao, entered it.
The gender swap was real, but it was hard to find a pair of truly devoted lovers. Harder still, Zang Xin couldn't get past the hurdle in his heart; he couldn't bring himself to do it.
Now someone was telling him it didn't have to be humans—that animals could be used, too. It gave Zang Xin an immense boost of hope.
"I imagine you're already itching to get started, Vice Sect Master Zang. On behalf of the Leng Family, let me congratulate you and Sect Master Cao in advance on your wedding. I hope I'll be drinking your wedding wine soon..."
Before you continue