Stellaris: I'm the Galaxy's Biggest Menace!
Chapter 16

Real modern space warfare

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Prigozhin had been irritable lately.

It was not just because of Xi Yan's threats. There was another reason.

He had too many Army troops, and logistics could barely keep up.

After all, they all needed to eat, train, and consume supplies.

The problem was that the Shoigu-Gerasimov military faction could meddle in the Empire's budget, swallowing the lion's share and leaving his Army nothing but scraps.

What was he supposed to do?

Even though General Veronica oversaw logistics and supplied him with weapons and ammunition, Shoigu and his people kept interfering.

Now almost the entire Army was running out of ammunition for training.

Prigozhin was so worried that his hair was falling out. As luck would have it, Xi Yan sent him another message demanding his submission. Although he had swallowed his humiliation and surrendered, securing a guarantee of his safety, he was still miserable.

The Empire's entire Army rests on my shoulders, and now we can barely even afford bullets. What am I supposed to do?

Prigozhin once again went through official channels to request weapons and ammunition, but his proposal never even reached Xi Yan. Shoigu's plants in the government rejected it halfway there.

Prigozhin had been happily cooking in his private kitchen. The moment he heard the news, he lost it.

Under this double blow, the plainspoken, middle-aged Russian changed into a presentable military uniform with trembling hands and opened Video Communication.

Shoigu and Gerasimov appeared on the holographic screen.

"Well, General Prigozhin! Long time no see. What can we do for you?"

At the sight of the fake smiles on their faces, Prigozhin's eyes went wide and blood rushed to his head.

You fucking...

"Shoigu! Gerasimov! Where the fuck is my ammunition?!!!"

Why the hell are you yelling so loud?!

Shoigu and Gerasimov's expressions instantly darkened. "Prigozhin, what is the meaning of this?"

"What is the meaning of this? You have the nerve to ask me that?"

Prigozhin's face flushed with fury. He had gone straight into full rage mode.

"You've blocked my military funding time and again! Now my entire Army can barely afford bullets! Whatever happens, you're coughing up that funding today!"

Shoigu took a puff of his cigar and shook his head. "What do you need so many Army troops for, anyway? Cut your forces sooner rather than later and save yourself all that expense."

"That's my business, not yours. Now give me my ammunition!" The cook grew even angrier.

"All right, all right. How about I approve a few million bucks for you?" Looking impatient, Shoigu tossed out that perfunctory reply and ended the call.

The screen reflected Prigozhin's stunned face. Then the middle-aged Russian slammed his fist onto the table in fury.

This is fucking outrageous! What good is a few million?

They're just bullying me because my Army can't hit their Navy up in space, aren't they?

The more the cook thought about it, the angrier he became. Remembering all the grievances he had suffered over the years and the humiliating predicament he now faced, his anger boiled over into reckless resolve!

"Fine, fine, fine. You're the ones who stopped acting human first!"

Prigozhin immediately opened Xi Yan's communication interface.

Death is at the door, and you still won't give me ammunition?

Then don't blame me for taking this even further!

Divine backup, activate!

----------Possibly this book's first scene divider----------

The following day, Xi Yan received a message from Shoigu, inviting him to a banquet at the Central Grand Hotel to discuss cooperation.

Most of the Shoigu-Gerasimov military faction's senior leadership and young officers would attend. They were certainly showing him every courtesy.

Courtesy called for courtesy, so Xi Yan naturally had to return the favor.

That was why he decided to pull off something spectacular.

At this point, there was no need to keep hiding anything. Seeing that the appointed time was approaching, Xi Yan prepared to set off for his destination.

There was no need to worry. Someone would report his movements to Shoigu and the others, giving them some peace of mind.

Before long, night fell.

Just kidding. There was no night at all. The Ring World orbited a star, remaining bathed in its light at all times. Darkness never came.

The Ring World had originally had panels to block the sunlight, but they had all broken down long ago, becoming space debris floating in orbit.

Over twenty years, the citizens of the Interstellar Human Military Junta had gradually adapted to life on a Ring World without shade panels, developing biological clocks suited to its daily rhythms.

Xi Yan clearly had not. He looked at the bright sky outside, then at the clock on his computer showing nine, and yawned again and again.

"Now I know why species with a Ring World start have [ring world preference] as a trait. This really does take some getting used to."

After another long yawn, Xi Yan wiped tears from his eyes. A great deal of negativity had already built up inside him.

"Hmph! Heaven creates all things to nourish mankind, yet mankind has nothing to repay heaven!"

"Oh, it's about time. Let's go!"

Xi Yan opened his communications, sent Ning Zhiyuan a long string of messages, and walked out of his office.

Outside, he found Yu Shuo, the captain of his personal guard, squatting by the wall and playing a video game on his Wristband.

The moment Xi Yan pushed the door open, a loud voice rang out from the Wristband.

"First kill! The sleeping dragon emerges!"

"Holy shit, this is still going!"

This game's been running for over two hundred years?

"Double kill! Fame in a single battle!"

That's two kills!

"Marshal, sir!"

Seeing Xi Yan emerge, Yu Shuo immediately switched off the holographic screen, straightened up, and saluted.

But his Wristband kept talking. "Triple kill! The whole world trembles!"

"Playing games, brother Yu Shuo?" Xi Yan greeted him.

"Uh, well, just a quick round."

Yu Shuo was starting to sweat.

His boss had caught him gaming on the job. Beta had probably seen him ages ago and deliberately kept quiet.

Yet Yu Shuo's Wristband was still going!

"Quadruple kill! Unrivaled under heaven!"

"No, I've got to see whose general is fighting so valiantly!" Xi Yan leaned over to look.

"Whoever trespasses upon the lands of Great Wu, I, Sheng, shall strike down!"

"Quintuple kill! Heaven and earth annihilated!"

"...All right, I know who it is."

Xi Yan pulled his head back, patted Yu Shuo on the shoulder, and strode off.

With practiced ease, Xi Yan gathered his personal guard, boarded his private spacecraft, and used his Wristband to contact Shoigu.

{Xi Yan: I'm on my way. I'll be there soon!}

{Shoigu: Good. Everyone's here. We're just waiting for our young Marshal.}

{Xi Yan: I've prepared a little gift for everyone!}

{Shoigu: How thoughtful of you, young Marshal. What is it?}

{Xi Yan: Step outside the hotel and look up.}

{Communication terminated}

Xi Yan immediately called the artillery unit Prigozhin had placed under his command.

"Hello? Target coordinates: the grand hotel. Saturate it with heavy fire for five minutes. Understood?"

"Yes, Marshal, sir!"

Meanwhile, Shoigu's curiosity had indeed been piqued by Xi Yan's mention of a gift. He went outside the hotel alone and looked up at the sky.

Could it be a fireworks display? That would be far too childish. The Marshal really is a child who hasn't grown up.

Or a formation of spacecraft flying past with colored contrails? Lame. That routine is two hundred years old.

Shoigu scratched his balding head, deeply puzzled.

Come to think of it, why isn't the young Marshal here yet? Has he gotten scared?

Well, he's only a child. He can't handle grand occasions...

Then Shoigu saw a long stream of "meteors" flying toward him from the horizon.

End of Chapter
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