I've had rigorous training. No matter how funny it is, I won't laugh

The night was dark, and the evening breeze blew gently.

On the way to the little bungalow, Huo Yuchen gazed at the rolling mountains in the distance under the bright moonlight, their silhouettes stretching on and on.

He also saw Xu Su's slender figure skipping along the path dappled with light and shadow, looking utterly cheerful.

Somehow, his gaze stopped there. As though bewitched, he simply couldn't look away...

Until someone behind him called out, "Mr. Huo, Chairman Huo is on the phone."

A phone was promptly handed to him.

Huo Yuchen withdrew his gaze, took the phone, and waved for the person to step back before holding it to his ear. "Grandpa."

On the other end was Huo Ruhui, chairman of the Huo Group.

"How is it? Settling in all right?"

Huo Yuchen said, "If I said I wasn't, would you let me go home?"

Huo Ruhui said, "Absolutely not. You promised your grandpa you'd behave yourself and finish filming this show, then bring me back a grandson-in-law."

Huo Yuchen said, "I only promised to participate in the show. I never promised to bring you back a grandson-in-law."

Huo Ruhui instantly grew agitated. "What?! You won't?! You! You unfilial grandson! Believe me, I'll jump off the second floor and die right in front of you!"

Huo Yuchen: "..."

When someone suddenly lost the ability to speak, there was always a reason.

Heaving a weary sigh, Huo Yuchen said, utterly devoid of the will to live, "Grandpa, this is a lifestyle reality show, not a dating show. There's no segment where you hold hands and go home together if you fancy each other."

Huo Ruhui didn't care about any of that. "Then have Yu Daniu add that segment! Just like he added that little game earlier. It's not a problem!"

Huo Yuchen raised his left hand and rubbed his brow helplessly. "Since you want me to find a partner, why didn't you sign me up for a dating show?"

Seriously, who the hell would come on a lifestyle show to find a partner???

Huo Ruhui, however, had his own reasoning. "Because I compared them, and the guests on this show are better-looking. You're more likely to fall for someone."

"...But has it occurred to you that the guests here might not be looking for a date at all?"

Huo Yuchen closed his eyes in exhaustion. "Like how you insisted on making me say those two lines during the game earlier. Has it occurred to you that they might just see it as a joke? It wouldn't do any..."

"What's the big deal!"

Huo Ruhui cut him off irritably. "The strong never complain about their circumstances! If they aren't, just find a way to make them be!"

Huo Yuchen: "..."

The next day.

Seven in the morning.

Inside the familiar dining room of the villa.

Xu Su ate sweet custard buns, drank thick, soft seafood congee, and watched the heartfelt performance taking place a short distance away-

Li Weizhou said, "Why can't we share breakfast?"

Director Yu said, "Because last night's game was an individual competition."

Li Weizhou said, "But we're a group."

Director Yu said, "Mr. Li, do you need me to explain what an individual competition is?"

"Pfft..."

Xu Su couldn't hold back and snorted with laughter.

Hearing him, Li Weizhou turned to look at him. "What are you laughing at?"

Xu Su wiped the smile off his face. "I'm not laughing."

"..."

Li Weizhou turned back and continued, "Then I can take some for Zhuang Luo, right? He's my partner. From a certain perspective, we're one."

Director Yu said, "No."

Li Weizhou said, "Why?"

Director Yu said, "Because this is a lifestyle reality show, not a dating show."

"Pfft..."

Xu Su failed to hold it in again.

Li Weizhou turned to look at him again. "What are you laughing at?"

Xu Su said, "I'm not laughing."

"..."

Li Weizhou turned back again and continued, "But there are always exceptions, aren't there? Like yesterday. Didn't Mr. Huo change the rules too?"

Director Yu said, "He didn't change the rules. He only discovered a hidden rule, and at least he didn't change the outcome in any way."

Li Weizhou said, "...Director Yu, people make the rules."

Director Yu said, "Human will triumphs over heaven."

"Pfft... Hahahahaha..."

Xu Su really couldn't hold it in anymore and burst out laughing.

Li Weizhou had also reached the end of his patience. "What are you laughing at? What's so funny!"

Xu Su pinched the corners of his mouth, struggling to suppress his laughter.

"Mr. Li, I've had rigorous training. No matter how funny it is, I won't laugh."

His shoulders shook wildly.

"Unless I really can't help it."

Li Weizhou: "..."

[Sorry, I've already piled three tons of cement onto the corners of my mouth, but I still couldn't help laughing.]

[Stephen Chow: remember to pay the fee for using my lines. Thanks.]

[Having to start my damn shift at six in the morning is miserable enough. I finally sneak a break to watch the livestream, and the second I click in, Xu Su is being a little shit.]

[Xu Su is seriously out of line. It's one thing not to help fight for the other guests, but he's even making snide remarks from the sidelines.]

[Aaaaaah, I smell something sweet! Our Zhouzhou is going out of his way to fight for Luoluo. He loves him so much!]

[Best Actor Li, stop fighting for someone else and hurry up and eat! If you don't, Xu Su is going to polish it all off by himself!]

Perhaps the viewers' calls had worked, because Li Weizhou soon returned to the table after his unsuccessful attempt.

But he was still too late-

Not one of the four custard buns remained, only one of the two tea eggs was left, and there was barely enough congee in the huge bowl to fill a small bowl halfway.

"Are you a pig? How can you eat so much?"

Li Weizhou's expression darkened slightly.

Xu Su let out a satisfied burp and asked, "Did the director specify how much breakfast each person gets?"

"..."

He hadn't.

"But even if he didn't, you should know what sharing equally means, shouldn't you?"

The muscles in Li Weizhou's face twitched. He was clearly holding back his anger.

Xu Su smiled. "I do. Giving every idiot an equal share of safe distance from ourselves is the kind of self-preservation every citizen should practice. 'Sharing equally,' for short."

"You!"

"So I'm going to practice self-preservation now. Goodbye."

Before Li Weizhou could finish, Xu Su stood and went outside to wait for everyone to gather.

[What a selfish bastard!]

[I only started following the livestream today, so let me timidly ask: is this really that lovesick fool everyone hated?]

[It's still the same person. Whether it's still the same soul remains to be verified.]

[Don't let Xu Su fool you, everyone! He's playing hard to get! He's trying to get our Zhouzhou's attention by taking a step back to move forward! Just wait. Sooner or later, he won't be able to keep up the act!]