Go Find Some Middle Schoolers and Do Their Holiday Homework for Them

In the clearing outside the villa.

Xu Su pulled a balled-up bundle of napkins out of his casual trouser pocket.

He unfolded the napkins to reveal a layer of greaseproof paper used to line steamers.

He unfolded the greaseproof paper to reveal three custard buns squashed together.

Xu Su held them out to Shen Chuanzhu, Lu Jing, and Huo Yuchen. "Come on, one each. Help yourselves."

"Ah! Thanks!"

Lu Jing immediately picked one up and stuffed it into his mouth.

Shen Chuanzhu politely took one too. "Thank you."

Return to a Simple Life was a lifestyle variety show that required physical exertion throughout.

Since they had chosen to participate in the show, they naturally understood that.

So they also understood that when food was available, they should try not to be picky, or they would definitely go hungry.

Although a single custard bun could never fill them up, it was better than nothing.

Huo Yuchen, however, thought otherwise.

"I don't need one."

He disdainfully rejected Xu Su's generosity.

Xu Su narrowed his eyes slightly. "Do you know why we humans have only ever drunk milk from black-and-white cows since ancient times?"

Huo Yuchen: "?"

"What does that have to do with-mmph..."

He had just opened his mouth to ask what the two things had to do with each other when Xu Su swiftly stuffed the last custard bun straight into his mouth.

"..."

Xu Su grinned in triumph. "What were you about to say?"

"..."

Huo Yuchen ignored him, turned his head, and started eating the custard bun.

[Xu Su's gone too far! He actually didn't give Zhuang Luo any!]

[Are you blind, commenter above? Didn't you see there were only three?]

[The others could go without. Zhuang Luo's so frail, he'll definitely be hungry if he doesn't eat.]

[That's so fucking ridiculous I'm laughing. So the others don't get hungry? Come on, commenter above, turn on your DMs. I'll teach you how to be a decent person.]

[I don't care, as long as Huo Yuchen got some.]

[Can some of you in the comments stop being so hostile? Could this possibly just be for the show?]

[Wait, you're all so busy arguing, didn't you notice Huo Yuchen's already eating his words?!]

[Well, Sherlock, you've spotted the key detail.]

Watching from the side, Zhuang Luo's eyes flashed with displeasure.

Xu Su had shared his food with everyone, excluding only him.

This was blatant targeting.

But on second thought, the reason Xu Su targeted him like this was that he was Li Weizhou's official boyfriend.

To put it bluntly, Xu Su was jealous of him.

Jealous that he had won Li Weizhou's heart, while Xu Su pursued him desperately but could never have him.

At that thought, Zhuang Luo's mood immediately improved again.

It also occurred to him that since Xu Su could bring food out for them, Li Weizhou would surely bring some out for him in a moment too. What was there to be angry about?

He could even use it to needle Xu Su later-two birds with one stone!

As he was thinking this with delight, he saw Li Weizhou emerge from the villa.

He went up to meet him. "Weizhou."

Li Weizhou had already calmed his anger by then. His manner was exceedingly gentle when he saw Zhuang Luo. "Luoluo."

The two smiled at each other, their eyes brimming with love.

But after waiting a while and seeing that Li Weizhou still made no move to reach into his pockets, the love in Zhuang Luo's eyes faded a little.

He asked tentatively, "Weizhou, did you have enough to eat?"

"More or less."

"..."

Li Weizhou had no idea what had just happened outside.

The custard buns were tiny, and the others had each finished theirs in one bite.

So by the time he came out, all he saw was the group chatting.

He simply assumed Zhuang Luo was asking out of concern for him.

The viewers clearly thought so too:

[Zhuang Luo's so kind.]

[This is definitely true love. He didn't get anything to eat himself, but he's still worrying about whether Best Actor Li had enough.]

[That's the Zhuang-Zhou CP I've shipped with my very life!]

[Which direction do I have to pray in to have a romance this sweet in this lifetime?]

But in reality, what Zhuang Luo truly cared about at that moment was not whether Li Weizhou was full.

He was more curious about what had happened between Li Weizhou and Xu Su inside the villa.

As he saw it, Li Weizhou must have known Xu Su was bringing food out. After all, they had eaten in the same dining room.

Then why had Li Weizhou agreed to let Xu Su bring food out?

Didn't he dislike Xu Su?

And conversely, why hadn't Li Weizhou brought any food out himself?

Did he not care about him, thinking it made no difference whether he ate?

Zhuang Luo couldn't figure it out.

With cameras all around, he couldn't ask either.

Otherwise, his persona would fall apart.

Unfortunately, Xu Su was a "trash-tier transmigrator," unequipped with special skills like mind reading.

If he had known that Zhuang Luo had thought this deeply over such a trivial matter, he would definitely have told him, with no justification but plenty of confidence:

First! I stole all of this!

Second! Your boyfriend didn't even get enough to eat himself. How could he possibly spare a thought for you!

Third! If you really have that much time on your hands, go rewatch those mealtime shows a few times, dig out every last little detail, then compile them into short videos and post them online to help other viewers!

Then go make a few cross-stitch versions of Along the River During the Qingming Festival and give them to elderly people living alone!

Then go research those questions in the danmei fandom that still spark arguments hundreds of comments long!

Once you've finished all that, go find some middle schoolers and do their holiday homework for them!

Director Yu blew his whistle to gather everyone.

Twenty minutes later, they arrived at a patch of uncultivated land.

Director Yu said, "Guests, please look! Behind me is a patch of uncultivated land!"

Everyone: "..."

Xu Su's face was expressionless. "Thanks. If you hadn't said it was uncultivated land, I would've thought it was the celestial Jade Pool, a paradise on earth."

Lu Jing sighed helplessly. "Director, we're not blind."

Director Yu gave an awkward laugh and began explaining the task rules.

"Behind me are thirty-three mu of land in total. This is the plot you'll be working on for the next half month!"

"To better help the villagers reclaim this uncultivated land, the production team has divided it into six plots of different sizes: three, four, five, six, seven, and eight mu!"

"As for who gets which plot, we'll have a little quiz shortly, and the plots will be assigned according to your rankings in the game!"

[Three, four, five, six, seven, eight? Director, who taught you to divide land like that?]

[The biggest is more than twice the smallest. The production team's really getting better and better at messing with people.]

[A sincere wish: I hope my husband Huo Yuchen picks two mu!!! (Also wishing that everyone else's wishes fail!)]

[Don't push it, commenter above. [smile][smile][smile] I was just fucking about to wish for Xu Su to pick eight mu.]