That evening, after a day of training, Rudeus was utterly exhausted. They had spent the entire day practicing swordsmanship, which had been a real treat for Radeus and Eris.
Poor Rudeus, meanwhile, could only take turns getting beaten up by the two of them. Clearly, people could not truly share one another's feelings.
Rudeus lay in bed, recalling Radeus's and Eris's sword techniques that afternoon.
Eris's swordsmanship was ferocious, every single blow incredibly heavy, but to Rudeus, who frequently sparred with Radeus and Paul, it was nothing special.
Radeus, however, was different. Not only was the bastard strong, he was fast as hell, and his swordsmanship was as nimble and unpredictable as a cat.
Every time, it looked less like sword practice and more like a sword dance. Grace and splendor were the defining features of Radeus's swordsmanship.
Rudeus could figure it out with his feet: that bastard's sword techniques were purely for showing off!
Paul had once asked Radeus what made a good swordsman.
Rudeus had answered that a good swordsman could cleave mountains and rivers with a single stroke, but Radeus had said:
"A qualified swordsman doesn't have to be strong, but he has to look cool. Strength is temporary; looking cool lasts a lifetime!"
Radeus's utterly incredible declaration had left them both thunderstruck!
"Forget it. I'm not thinking about that dumbass anymore. I need to hurry up and finish the figurine."
Rudeus glanced at the half-finished Roxy figurine on the table and slowly climbed out of bed.
"Master Roxy's appearance and clothes are easy enough, but what am I supposed to do about what's underneath?"
"I can base the panties on the pair Radeus stole, but I don't know any of the other details of her body. It's all that bastard Radeus's fault for constantly getting in my way!"
Rudeus fretted, repeatedly scratching his head as he tried to recall every last detail of Roxy.
Just then, a mysterious voice came from behind Rudeus.
"Oh-ho, are you saying I did something wrong?"
Radeus looked at Rudeus with a lethally friendly expression, his words utterly devoid of warmth.
"Eek!"
Hearing that all-too-familiar voice, Rudeus stiffly turned his head, inch by inch.
Fuck! It really was Radeus!
At that moment, how Rudeus wished he were anywhere but this room!
"Ra... no, Brother, my dear brother, you did nothing wrong. The one at fault is your foolish little brother, so..."
"Stop!!!"
Before Rudeus could finish, Radeus grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and tossed him into the air.
Rudeus's face nearly touched the ceiling. Another centimeter, and he could have tasted some delicious aged wood.
With a thud, Rudeus successfully delivered a full-body elbow drop to the floor.
"Fuck! That hurts like hell!"
Rudeus rolled back and forth on the floor, in unbearable pain.
One servant outside said, "Did something happen in there?"
Another servant said, "Don't look where you shouldn't, and don't interfere where you shouldn't. Noble gentlemen all have certain peculiar tastes..."
Ignoring Rudeus's wails, Radeus picked up the Roxy figurine on the table with one hand, nodding repeatedly as he appraised it.
"Very nice. It looks almost exactly like Roxy!"
"Okay, it's settled. This thing belongs to me now. I'll make it a sacred relic of the Roxy Faith for the faithful to worship."
Rudeus had just finished healing himself with healing magic when he heard a certain robber announce that he was taking his belongings.
"On what grounds?! I haven't even finished it!" Rudeus shouted.
"On what grounds? Aren't my superior stats grounds enough? As for the details underneath, I'll finish those myself."
Radeus waved a fist at Rudeus and flexed his muscles, immediately leaving Rudeus speechless.
Fine, you're awesome!
"How are you going to finish the details underneath? Have you peeped on her?"
Rudeus questioned Radeus with feigned curiosity, though he already had an answer in mind.
"Ahem, you don't need to know that!"
Radeus coughed a few times, unwilling to answer that question.
Besides, how could something a scholar did be called peeping? It was called appreciation! Understand?
You ignorant bumpkin!
"And that crappy Roxy Faith of yours-are all its future believers going to be nutjobs like you?"
Rudeus's masochistic tendencies suddenly kicked in. Right now, he needed his big brother's tender affection!
Bam, bam, bam!
Radeus promptly rewarded Rudeus with three iron fists of love, giving him more than he could stomach and making him take the rest to go.
Just kidding! Even if he could stomach it, he still had to take it to go!
Another three crisp notes rang out, and Rudeus suddenly had six big lumps on his head. Congratulations! If he shaved his head, he could become a monk on the spot!
"Join the faith and receive a Roxy figurine with complete details underneath. Removable parts included!"
The devil's words echoed in Rudeus's ears...
"Details underneath... removable parts!"
Rudeus swallowed. For a figurine fanatic like him, this was simply an irresistible temptation!
"Please let me join and become a brainless believer!"
Without a second's hesitation, Rudeus immediately dropped to his knees and begged to join.
Even a second's hesitation would have been blasphemy against the Roxy figurine!
People could say whatever they wanted online, but who wouldn't want a Roxy figurine in real life?!
You said you didn't want one?
Holy chovy, watch what you're saying! What's with all that drool?!
"Excellent. As leader of this faith, I permit you to join. From this day forth, you are the deputy leader!"
Looking at the groveling Rudeus, Radeus nodded in satisfaction.
Of course, it was all a lie. How could he possibly give him the complete Roxy figurine?!
He could just give him any ordinary version when the time came. It wasn't as though he would dare complain.
Complete details underneath? Removable parts? All of it had been a lie to get his hands on the Roxy figurine!
My foolish little brother!
"As you command, Your Holiness! Praise the goddess Roxy!"
Rudeus knelt before Radeus on one knee, his face full of devotion.
"Mm, excellent, Deputy Leader! What a noble bearing. Praise the goddess Roxy!"
Radeus raised the Roxy figurine and crowned Rudeus.
"Now I shall take the divine image back to remake it. Tomorrow, you shall behold our goddess's magnificent form!"
"As you command. Farewell, Your Holiness!"
Of course, Rudeus also knew he could never get the fully detailed version.
That was why he had deliberately used joining the faith as a pretext to put Radeus at ease, so he could find a chance to take back the Roxy figurine afterward!
Hahaha! My foolish big brother, you fell for it!
With his head lowered, Rudeus wore the smile of someone whose scheme had succeeded.
Radeus left Rudeus's room with the Roxy figurine.
Just after stepping out the door, the corners of Radeus's mouth rose slightly into a smile just like Light Yagami's.
Idiot. As if I wouldn't know you were only pretending to submit, using it to lull me into complacency so you could get the completed divine image!
Too bad! I saw it coming long ago!
That's why I won't finish the statue at all. I'll engrave it in my eyes and seal it in my brain for eternity, then secretly dispose of the divine image.
Go ahead and search. You won't find it in a lifetime!
Hahaha, my foolish little brother, it seems my intelligence still surpasses yours!
Radeus was inwardly pleased with himself, but the moment he pushed the door open and went out, he regretted it...
Because the door had not been shut properly to begin with, the people outside had heard everything that went on inside, loud and clear.
The servants outside stared in shock at Radeus as he emerged from Rudeus's room.
Seeing their expressions, Radeus instantly flushed bright red and returned to his own room.
As soon as he reached his room, Radeus rolled back and forth on his bed.
"Aaah, this is so embarrassing! I can't face anyone!"
"A serious person like me, caught acting out such a cringeworthy scene! Now they'll probably think I'm a pervert like Rudeus!"
Rudeus: ???
In his own room, Rudeus suddenly sneezed.
"You bastard, Radeus! You must be bad-mouthing me behind my back! Good grief!"
Before you continue