"I was just mentioning it casually," Xuan Ming said calmly. "I can't concern myself with that right now."
His tone was calm, but Bibi Dong and Gu Yuena, who knew him well, could detect a hint of coldness in his words.
If things don't go well, if he has to resort to extreme measures... he doesn't even know how many people will die.
After learning about the official business of the Spirit Hall Empire, Xuan Ming followed Bibi Dong to the depths of the Pope's Palace.
"You've only been on Sea God Island for half a year, why are you back so suddenly? Where's Nana?" Bibi Dong asked with some concern.
"She's fine. I came back because of you." Xuan Ming brushed the hair from his forehead, revealing the golden trident mark.
Bibi Dong's eyes changed slightly, "You... you passed the God's Trial? The Sea God's?"
Xuan Ming nodded. "It's the Sea God's, but it's not just the Sea God's; it's very complicated, and I'm not entirely sure either."
"You..." Bibi Dong sensed Xuan Ming's unfathomable aura, which seemed even more powerful than hers.
Such a big change has happened in just six months?
"Which exam are you on?" Bibi Dong couldn't help but ask.
"I just finished the Second Trial," Xuan Ming said.
Bibi Dong was taken aback, "So fast?"
Only half a year has passed since Xuan Ming set off for Sea God Island, and he has already completed two trials?
"No, you mean it's because of me?" Bibi Dong frowned slightly.
" The Rakshasa God Trial?"
"Hmm." Xuan Ming nodded, his gaze fixed on Bibi Dong. "My Third Trial is called ' Slay Evil and Pacify the Soul.' Its content is to deal with the hidden dangers in the inheritance of the Rakshasa Godhood Inheritance and stabilize the inheritor's condition."
He paused, carefully observing Bibi Dong's reaction. "Have you noticed any strange changes lately? Besides the stagnation in your God's Trial, have you noticed anything unusual in your emotions, thoughts, or body?"
Bibi Dong's pupils contracted slightly, almost instinctively avoiding Xuan Ming's gaze, her tone a little stiff. "No, everything is fine."
But Xuan Ming clearly caught the fleeting panic and evasiveness in her eyes. She was lying. The evil influence of the Rakshasa could not have been without warning.
Seeing Bibi Dong's forced composure, Xuan Ming sighed silently in his heart.
He stepped forward and, to Bibi Dong's somewhat surprised look, gently pulled her into his arms.
"Don't worry, don't be afraid," Xuan Ming's voice rang in her ear, deep and steady, "I'm here."
Surrounded by this sudden embrace and feeling the reassuring aura emanating from Xuan Ming, Bibi Dong's tense mind relaxed slightly, but what followed was an even more complex and indescribable surge of emotions.
She leaned against Xuan Ming's chest, remained silent for a moment, then suddenly whispered in a tone tinged with self-mockery and bitterness, "I saw it... that night, you and Gu Yuena..."
Xuan Ming's body stiffened almost imperceptibly.
Bibi Dong seemed oblivious, continuing to speak, her voice filled with a bitterness and confusion that even she herself didn't fully understand. "I don't know what's wrong with me... I told myself a long time ago that there would be no future for us. Just maintaining the status quo is already a luxury."
"I originally... hoped that you and Nana would be together. I know that child's feelings better than anyone else. I wanted her to be happy, to have her wishes fulfilled, and not to end up on the same path as me..."
Her voice trailed off, tinged with weakness, "But you chose Gu Yuena first... You and Nana maintained your distance for Slaughter City, why her of all people..."
These words, like a long-suppressed volcano, found an outlet at this moment.
She knew she shouldn't say it, shouldn't have such emotions; it wasn't in line with her identity as the Pope, nor with the invisible boundary she had always set for herself between herself and Xuan Ming.
But at this moment, under Xuan Ming's sudden embrace and the immense pressure of the God's Trial, she couldn't control herself.
Xuan Ming listened quietly without interrupting.
He could sense the deep-seated obsession, resentment, and complex "motherly" emotion in Bibi Dong's words—an emotion that even she herself might not be able to clearly define—that she hoped Hu Liena could be happy.
All of this was intertwined with the restless, Rakshasa Evil Thoughts within her, making her mind even more chaotic.
"You should be glad you took all those girls with you, otherwise... I might have already taken action against them." Bibi Dong's tone was tinged with coldness.
Gu Yuena was the first to notice her unusual behavior, so she quickly took her to Sunset Forest and hid her in the Ice and Fire Yin Yang Well.
If it weren't for that, Xuan Ming would have already killed those young girls during those years in the Slaughter City.
Especially Gu Yuena!
"Why didn't you attack me? That's my problem," Xuan Ming said.
"It's because I can't bear to part with it, and it's because I'm greedy. The root of all these problems lies with me. If you're going to hate or resent someone, you should hate or resent me."
"They are innocent."
Bibi Dong suddenly raised her head, her purple eyes filled with pain, anger, and a twisted love. "Hate you? Resent you? Of course I hate you! I hate that you had to appear in my Life! I hate that you, who are so much younger than me, made me become someone I'm not! I hate that you gave me these weak, unwanted emotions!"
Her voice trembled, and the Rakshasa Divine Power seemed to be aroused by her intense emotions. Wisps Sisi purplish-black aura spread uncontrollably from her body, causing the temperature in the room to drop a few degrees.
"But..." Her voice suddenly dropped, filled with endless weariness and confusion, "What can I do with you? Kill you? I can't do that... Hurt you? I can't do that either..."
She looked into Xuan Ming's eyes, " Xuan Ming, tell me, what should I do? This path of Rakshasa is becoming more and more painful for me, and I'm becoming less and less like myself. But if I give up, what about my years of perseverance, my revenge, my empire...?"
This was the first time she had so openly revealed her vulnerability and struggles to Xuan Ming.
Rakshasa's malice amplified her paranoia and possessiveness, while also making her more clearly feel the pain and distortion brought about by this power.
She knew she had gone mad long ago! Qian Xunji had ruined everything she had!
That night, she lost not only her innocence, but also her self!
She had intended to live her life recklessly like this, but then Xuan Ming appeared. He just hovered in front of her and forcefully pulled her back, even though he had never thought of such a thing.
She wanted to escape, to be as crazy as before, but that damned Nine-Tailed Heavenly Fox haunted her mind every day! It kept bringing Xuan Ming to her eyes, giving her no chance at all!
She couldn't be as crazy as before, but she also couldn't stay sober!
Because once she remains conscious and calm, she experiences immense pain!
Her life is a complete mess! There's no going back!
Xuan Ming listened quietly to Bibi Dong's almost collapsing whispers, watching the pain, anger, resentment, and twisted yet incredibly real attachment intertwined in her eyes, and a complex emotion he couldn't describe welled up in his heart.
He understood that Bibi Dong's current state was not only due to the corruption of Rakshasa Evil Thoughts, but also the complete eruption of her emotions that had been suppressed for many years and twisted by cruel fate, under the pressure of the stagnation of the God's Trial and the stimulation of seeing him close to other women.
She hated him, resented him, yet couldn't truly hurt him; this contradiction tore her apart.
Chapter 340 Choice
"I'm sorry." Xuan Ming tightened his arms, pulling the slightly trembling Bibi Dong into a tighter embrace.
"Blame me."
Bibi Dong raised her teary, purple eyes and looked at him. "Why are you always like this? Why can't you be a little more ruthless? Why do you always take the blame upon yourself?"
Xuan Ming looked at Bibi Dong's tearful question and said calmly, "Someone has to take responsibility."
"Take responsibility?" Bibi Dong's voice trembled slightly with mockery. "Take responsibility for what? Take responsibility for my madness, my paranoia, my inability to control myself? Xuan Ming, you're always like this! You always take everything upon yourself! You make me... make me unable to even truly hate you!"
She shoved Xuan Ming away abruptly, her purple eyes filled with pain and confusion. "Why can't you be as ruthless to me as you were to Qian Renxue? You call me selfish, you call me crazy, you call me blinded by power! Why do you always remain silent or blame yourself whenever I lose control?!"
"Do you know that what you're doing... is only making me more miserable! Making me feel even more worthless! Making it impossible for me to even find an excuse to vent!"
Bibi Dong's emotions surged again, and the evil Rakshasa energy around her surged violently.
She would rather Xuan Ming treat her like a real enemy, giving her a reason to completely explode and utterly fall into despair, than like now, with an almost tolerant attitude that blames himself, leaving her tormented on the edge of madness and lucidity.
Xuan Ming stepped forward, gently wiping away the tears from the corners of her eyes, his gesture carrying a tenderness that contrasted sharply with his usual coldness. "I'm not taking responsibility."
"I am stating the facts. Your condition, the abnormality of the Rakshasa God Trial, is indeed related to me. My appearance, my choices, affected your emotions, and consequently, your test."
Xuan Ming paused for a moment, then said, "You chose this path yourself, and you pursued this power yourself. How you walk this path, how you control it—the ultimate choice is always in your hands."
I can't make choices for you, nor can I bear the consequences of your choices. All I can do is try my best to pull you out of the abyss. But whether you reach out or not, whether you grab on or not, is your decision.
"I know you've lost a lot, but... at least you're not completely destitute. Are you going to go crazy over what you've lost in the past, even abandoning everything you still have now, or... try your best to preserve everything you still have?"
These words struck Bibi Dong's heart like a hammer, instantly cooling her boiling emotions.
She lost... so much.
Innocence, dignity, love, and hopes for the future... were almost completely destroyed by Qian Xunji.
She once thought that she had nothing left but revenge and Destruction.
But Xuan Ming's words reminded her.
She also has... the Spirit Hall Empire. This is a vast empire she poured her heart and soul into building, the foundation of her revenge, and the symbol of her power.
She also had... Hu Liena, her disciple who regarded her as a mother, depended on her, and respected her; she was one of the few sources of warmth and concern in her cold heart.
She also has... the man in front of her whom she hates with a passion, yet she can't truly let go of him, and who has even become a kind of spiritual pillar for her.
Is she really... going to succumb to the madness of Rakshasa, destroying everything before her with her own hands, all because of that irreversible past?
The thrill of Destruction may be alluring, but what comes after? Endless emptiness? Or utter annihilation?
Bibi Dong leaned against the cold wall, breathing heavily, her purple eyes filled with a fierce interplay of madness and pain.
Xuan Ming remained silent, simply watching her and awaiting her decision. He knew this was a hurdle she had to overcome on her own.
Time seemed to stand still.
After a long while, the madness in Bibi Dong's eyes gradually faded, replaced by a clarity tinged with despair after extreme exhaustion.
She slowly raised her head and looked at Xuan Ming, "Aren't you going to try to persuade me?"
It's always been like this. Xuan Ming always speaks Bingbing, throwing the choice in front of others without offering any guidance or showing any favoritism.
Choose whichever you like!
"Persuade? How?" Xuan Ming countered.
Should I advise you to let go of the past, or should I advise you to be more positive?
"I can't let go of it myself, I can't be positive about it."
"In terms of distortion, I'm not much better than you."
"What right do I have to advise you? And how can I possibly advise you?"
His voice was calm, even tinged with self-mockery, yet utterly genuine, like a mirror reflecting the equally wounded souls of both of them.
Bibi Dong was stunned. The intense emotions in her purple eyes slowly subsided, transforming into a deeper, almost deathly, sense of bewilderment.
Yeah... what's there to advise?
Should we persuade her to let go of everything Qian Xunji destroyed? Should we persuade her to forget the unforgettable humiliation and hatred? Should we persuade her to embrace the sunshine like a normal person?
These words would sound utterly pale and laughable coming from anyone else's mouth. Let alone coming from Xuan Ming —a man who also carries a heavy past, whose heart is also corrupted by darkness, and who has even embarked on a path that is almost self-destructive.
He really had no right to advise her.
Because he himself has never truly "let go" or been "optimistic."
He was simply struggling in the darkness and wading through the mire in his own way.
His composure and strength do not stem from a sense of relief, but from a deeper acceptance and control over his own destiny, even if that control sometimes appears cold and extreme.
Xuan Ming watched the madness fade from her eyes and the confusion that followed, and continued, "What I can do is not to advise you, but to tell you the facts. To tell you that you have a choice. To tell you what the different choices will lead to."
"Whether you sink into the abyss with the ashes of the past, or grasp what you can still hold onto, even if the road ahead remains painful and difficult, is a choice only you can make."
"Because only you are required to bear all the consequences of your own choices."
His words contained neither warm encouragement nor condescending accusations; they were simply a cold and clear statement of reality. This almost cruel honesty strangely calmed Bibi Dong's chaotic mind.
She doesn't need insincere comfort or useless advice. What she needs is perhaps this kind of clear-headedness to face the bloody reality, even if this clarity itself is a great pain.
Bibi Dong slowly straightened up. Although the Rakshasa evil energy around her had not completely subsided, it was no longer churning uncontrollably. She looked at Xuan Ming, a complex light flashing in her purple eyes.
When did you grow up?
Bibi Dong asked the question very softly, with a hint of dazedness.
In her memory, Xuan Ming seemed to still be stuck in the past, in Spirit City, that stubborn, inflexible child.
Because throughout his years in Heaven Dou City, his demeanor in front of Qian Renxue has never changed—he remains the same cold, stubborn, and even somewhat childish boy who confronts Qian Renxue head-on.
Xuan Ming remained silent for a moment, a barely perceptible ripple flashing in his icy blue eyes.
"It was probably when I realized that being willful requires resources, and I didn't have any."
Being willful requires capital.
He didn't.