Xiaoli raised a finger of her left hand, resting it on the left side of her nose, and said coldly, "If you were like me, spending every day in kindergarten with those childish kids, would you be just as indifferent?"
Duan Xuanyu moment, then suddenly said, "If you encounter a bear in the wild, as long as you lie on the ground and don't move, the bear will think you're dead."
Xiaoli still had a sour face, and sneered, "Tch. Naïve. I already knew that."
Duan Xuanyu: "So in the bear's house, the first bear to wake up every morning thinks the whole family is dead, which is really sad for the bear."
Xiaoli: "..."
[Sobbing, I'm so sad! I want to send my best friend to be a bear!]
Why is he telling jokes with such a blank expression...?
[This is the first time I've ever seen what "speechless" means on a five-year-old's face, and I have that expression on my face right now.]
Xiaoli then used one finger of her right hand to support the bridge of her right nose, trying her best to remain indifferent.
But actually, I was already about to burst!
What to do? He's so funny!
No, you can't laugh!
How can a reserved little girl give up her reserved demeanor just because of a joke!
Duan Xuanyu then spoke in a serious tone, "There was a sheep that couldn't sleep after taking a bath. Do you know why?"
Xiaoli scoffed dismissively, "Naive. I don't care to know."
Duan Xuanyu: "Because it's wet and soft."
Xiaoli's face trembled slightly.
Suddenly, she jumped off the sofa, ran into her room, shoved herself under the covers, and pulled the blanket over her head!
When Duan Xuanyu went over to check, he saw the blanket trembling incessantly.
He wondered what had happened to her...
As a result, they pulled the blanket away.
The Xiaoli inside was laughing silently.
His face was sore from smiling.
[Hahaha x100!]
[To maintain her persona, the Aloof Sister deliberately changed all her laughter to a vibrating sound.]
[ Aloof Sister, if you have a low threshold for laughter, don't try to create a cold-hearted persona (/ω)]
Su Mian and Lin Xi have not yet found their fourth child.
They had no choice but to walk around the yard shouting.
" Xiaolu, where are you?"
Suddenly, a child slid down from the side and stopped in front of Su Mian.
He knelt on one knee, one hand on the ground, the other raised high, with a rose between his teeth.
Su Mian: "... Sliding like that, don't your knees hurt?"
The Xiaolu stood up and put the rose from its mouth back into its pocket.
Then, flicking the American spiky barb from his forehead, he gave a cool smile, "The pain is temporary! The coolness lasts a lifetime!"
Haha, these kids are all so clever! [laughing and crying emoji]
[I thought he was giving those roses to Mianmian, but it turns out they were just props for his entrance!]
[I'm really afraid that when my Xiaolu grows up and looks back at this, he'll say: This isn't my embarrassing history, it's the path I came from.]
[But Brother Xiaolu is really handsome, and I like guys who are both handsome and a little crazy. Can I have custody of him? Waaaaah, even though we don't know each other.]
Su Mian felt that this child was quite strong-willed and probably wouldn't be easy to obey.
He took out his phone and started searching for information about him, intending to study him thoroughly before taking appropriate action.
It turns out his father played many roles in gangster films, school bullies, triad bosses, the Bund gangster leaders...
No wonder the Xiaolu acted that way.
Lin Xi squatted down and said to the Xiaolu with a smile, "Little one, get to know us. We're your mom and dad today. Come on, call us dad."
The Xiaolu grinned crookedly, revealing its incomplete teeth.
He suddenly pulled a toy gun from his pocket and pressed it against Lin Xi's forehead. "In the entire Kowloon City, it's me, Brother Xiaolu, who's in charge. Call me Big Brother, or I'll beat you up."
Lin Xi snatched the gun from him and pressed it against Xiaolu's head. "Call me Dad, or I'll kill you."
The Xiaolu deer pouted and burst into tears.
Lin Xi: "..."
[Haha, his coolness only lasts three seconds...]
[Luckily I wasn't there; it's much more interesting to watch other kids with their kids!]
[ Diarrhea Bro: You were the one who wanted to play first, but now you cry when I actually play with you o(╥╥)o]
Lin Xi panicked. "Little one, don't cry, okay? I'll call you Dad, alright?"
The Xiaolu was still crying.
Su Mian suddenly stretched out her finger and poked it into the Xiaolu's open mouth.
The Xiaolu was stunned, looking at her in surprise, and immediately forgot to cry.
This is Su Mian's secret weapon for dealing with crying children.
Because children often find it strange when an adult puts their hand in their mouth... and then they stop crying.
Sure enough, the Xiaolu suddenly felt bored, sniffed, and stopped.
Su Mian took out a tissue to wipe his tears, saying as she did so, " Brother Xiaolu, you're already pretty cool and roguish, but you're still missing something."
The Xiaolu blinked. "What's missing?"
Su Mian took out the wound, stuck it on his nose, then applied lipstick to his forehead and smeared it with her fingers to make it look like there was blood on his face.
After finishing his makeup and styling, I even posed him. "Hey, right! Be a little roguish! Raise half a corner of your mouth, but definitely not both. Also, put your hands in your pockets, and stand casually!"
Su Mian took out her phone again and took pictures of him from every angle.
While filming, he exclaimed, "Wow! You're so incredibly cool and roguish! You've completely captured that vibe! You're totally my type! Who can tell you the Bund gangsters? Like a wave crashing and flowing—yes, that's it, that languid and nonchalant attitude! You're the epitome of cool and roguish!"
The Xiaolu's face quietly turned red, and she couldn't suppress the blush on her lips no matter how hard she tried.
[Our Roguishly Handsome Bro has been charmed and turned into a pretty boy!]
[Forget about the Roguishly Handsome Bro, even my little brother got hooked on by Sister Mian through the screen, and now he's biting a chocolate bar and asking me if he's roguish handsome...]
[A Chosen Kindergarten Teacher! Sister Mian, promise me you'll quit the entertainment industry and become a kindergarten teacher, okay?!]
Teacher Sun (Education Expert): [ Su Mian's education system has serious problems. Those morally questionable TV dramas like " The Bund" should be reported, taken off the air, and banned nationwide!]
Teacher Sun (Education Expert): [ Su Mian actually guided the child to imitate the characters in the story! Su Mian, this child has done nothing to you, why are you doing this to him!]
Teacher Sun (Education Expert): [I suggest sending this child to me; I can guide him correctly!]
Suddenly, an account claiming to be an "education expert" appeared in the live stream and started spamming attacks on Su Mian.
However, the comments section didn't buy it:
[That's too sensitive...]
[Reporting Balala the Fairies for being pornographic, reporting Weslie and Big Big Wolf for being bloody and violent, reporting Calabash Brothers for urinating and defecating in public... There aren't many artistic works left for us adults!]
Su Mian turned around and swiftly climbed up the tree!
Then, while still in the tree, she continued taking pictures of the Xiaolu: "Yes, yes, this is the angle! It's so fragmented! So full of story! It blows all the male leads out of the water!"
Viewers had seen Su Mian climb walls before, so it wasn't surprising to them.
But this was the first time Xiaolu had seen someone with such amazing skills, and her eyes were filled with admiration!
And she understands herself very well!
Such a cool older sister praising her own looks! Xiaolu was overjoyed!
After taking the photos, Su Mian jumped down from the tree and showed them to the Xiaolu.
This is exactly the feeling the Xiaolu wanted!
After looking at the photo, when he looked at Su Mian again, his eyes seemed to say: I will always be your little brother!
If he had a progress bar, he would be 100% tamed by now.
But this is not the limit of Su Mian's ability to tame children!
She still has work to do!