Douluo: Everyone Has a System? Everyone's Absurd!
Chapter 13

Divine Departure? I Won't Depart-I'm More Badass Than a God!

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(A beautiful picture of Ning Rongrong)

[Ding, task completed!] [5 Greed Points recovered!] [Current Greed Points: 6] [Martial Soul bonuses: increased luck and increased system storage capacity!] [The higher the Greed Points, the greater the bonuses!]

Xiao Jue was overjoyed. Sweet! I made a killing this time!

Meanwhile, after paying for the expensive meal, Ning Rongrong also received a hundredfold rebate.

She looked at the 100,000 Gold Soul Coins that had appeared in her system storage, her eyes curving into crescent moons.

Both of them were satisfied, and the meal ended happily for everyone.

It was late, and the sun was setting. Carrying bags large and small, the two headed toward Shrek Academy.

Ning Rongrong skipped along the way, in an exceptionally good mood.

She stole a glance at Xiao Jue, bit her lip, and asked softly, "Today was so much fun. Can you... come shopping with me again sometime?"

Xiao Jue looked at her with a smile. "Of course~"

But inwardly, he thought, Ning Rongrong has so many Greed Points. I can farm them just by staying with her!

This right here is a win-win!

On the roof of Shrek Academy.

Flender crouched there, scratching his head, a puzzled look on his face.

He stared at "Ning Rongrong" in the distance and muttered to himself, "That proud and arrogant Ning Rongrong actually finished the run? And she didn't slow down once?"

He scratched his head. It really was strange.

Flender narrowed his eyes, feeling that something was off, but unable to put his finger on it.

"Forget it. As long as she finished."

He shook his head and jumped down from the roof.

The real Ning Rongrong, meanwhile, was walking back to the academy with Xiao Jue, chatting and laughing, a skewer of candied hawthorns in her hand.

"Little Xiaozi, let's go shopping in Heaven Dou City next time! They have so much more stuff there!"

"Sure, but it'll have to be sometime later."

"Okay, it's a deal! Your big sister will show you the world when the time comes!"

Night fell. Flender, dean of Shrek Academy and the Four-Eyed Cat Owl, stood on the main training ground, looking at all seven students before him.

He had originally wanted to teach Ning Rongrong a lesson, but since she had finished the entire run, he couldn't very well take it out on her.

Flender clasped his hands behind his back and cleared his throat:

"All right, get ready to leave. Next, you'll begin your first lesson since arriving at Shrek. Each of you will complete your own lesson independently. Don't blame me for not warning you beforehand. If you don't do well enough, even if you don't die, you'll lose a layer of skin."

Xiao Jue was wandering around nearby with a broom in hand, whistling as he looked for a chance to recover fragments.

Flender waved his hand and said, "Let's go. Follow me."

With that, he pushed off the ground with his toes and darted lightly away, heading out of the academy.

Everyone hurried after him.

Seeing this, Xiao Jue followed too, at a loss for words.

What first lesson? Isn't he just having everyone take part in Soul Fighting? I could teach that too...

Before long, everyone arrived in Suotuo City.

After taking them for a cup of the cheapest tea, Flender led them toward the Soto Great Soul Arena.

Xiao Jue followed behind. When he saw someone selling masks by the roadside, he went over for a curious look.

The vendor wore a mask himself and was energetically promoting his wares.

"Honored customer, look at this mask! It can change faces! You can make it look however you want!"

Xiao Jue's eyes lit up, and he paid for the mask with its many face-changing functions.

After entering the Soto Great Soul Arena, Xiao Jue bought an all-access ticket.

The ticket let him watch any Soul Fighting match throughout the day, so he could freely enter and leave each of the individual Soul Fighting arenas.

Xiao Jue felt delighted. Having Rongrong as my little treasure chest is great!

Soon, their Soul Fighting matches began.

Xiao Wu defeated Qing Bao without any trouble.

Then the announcement for Tang San's Soul Fighting match against Ma Hongjun came out.

Xiao Jue headed for the corresponding arena and saw that the two were about to take the stage.

Xiao Jue put on his mask and sat in the front row of the stands.

Since they were two youngsters and neither was particularly good-looking, not many people came to watch the match.

The spectators were scattered sparsely around the stands, fewer than fifty in all.

Just then, a system panel popped up before Xiao Jue with a ding-

[Ding, system task received: make the one with the better chance of winning lose, and recover 10 Envy Points!]

Xiao Jue stroked his chin and muttered, "The one with the better chance of winning should be Tang San..."

A mischievous smile curled the corners of his lips.

"Sorry about this, Little San!"

The host briefly introduced both contestants' names and Martial Souls, then signaled for their Soul Fight to begin.

Ma Hongjun's small eyes spun as he thought, I have the Ah Fu System. Why don't I make an agreement with this kid not to use our Martial Souls?

He cleared his throat and shouted, "Tang San, do you dare settle this without using Martial Souls?"

Tang San sneered inwardly. What a joke! Even without my Martial Soul, I still have the Tang Sect Secret Arts. My Hidden Weapons, movement techniques, and internal force-which one of them couldn't thrash this fatty?

Since this little fatty has delivered himself to my door, how could I possibly refuse?

Tang San said calmly, "Sure, come on!"

Ma Hongjun said, "Come on!"

[Ding, the host is in combat. The Ah Fu System will help you use moves at random to defeat your opponent!] [Use enough moves in total to meet the requirement and receive a Talisman as a reward!]

Ma Hongjun was ecstatic. This Soul Fight is the perfect chance to use a ton of moves!

The next second, Ma Hongjun automatically used that move!

"Crow Takes Flight!"

He spread his arms and leaped high into the air like a clumsy penguin,

his chubby body tracing a comical arc through the air, both legs kicking wildly, looking just like a fat hen that had been kicked into the sky.

Tang San's pupils contracted. "Holy crap, this move again?!"

Just then, a system also popped up before him with a ding-

[Ding, the God-Level Choice System has triggered a choice! Faced with Ma Hongjun flying at you, you will:] [A: Dodge with Ghost Shadow Perplexing Track! Avoid unnecessary danger! No reward and no side effects!] [B: Catch Ma Hongjun with Mysterious Jade Hand! Receive 10 system points (redeemable for items in the system store). Side effect: a random body part becomes 1 cm shorter.] [C: Do nothing! The first body part to make contact with Ma Hongjun will be strengthened, with no side effects!]

Tang San's thoughts raced.

He had originally been planning to use Ghost Shadow Perplexing Track to dodge, but with no reward, wouldn't that be wasting a choice?

The 10 system points from option B weren't bad, but that side effect... the randomness made it far too much of a trap!

What if the thing that gets shorter is... He was already rather self-conscious about that part of himself. He absolutely couldn't let it get any shorter!

Option C meant taking Ma Hongjun's attack head-on, but it had no side effects and could strengthen a body part. It was only a moment of pain!

C it is!

Ma Hongjun spread his arms, leaped high, and flew toward the top of Tang San's head.

Tang San, however, did not evade his attack!

Someone in the audience shouted, "Why isn't he dodging?"

Another person said, "He's dodging sand and sheltering from the wind! Even a god would have to dodge that!"

Ma Hongjun, rapidly closing in on Tang San, panicked too. Why isn't he moving???

Tang San closed his eyes, gritted his teeth, and stood motionless like a block of wood:

"Divine Departure? I won't depart-I'm more badass than a god!"

Ma Hongjun cried, "Wait a second-"

End of Chapter
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