Who Would Eat a Plate of Stinky Socks?

A few seconds later, with the sound of space tearing apart, Lu Guan reappeared in front of Lacerta.

"Sorry... I activated my ability unconsciously again just now." Lu Guan removed the demon mask covering his face.

His earlier words, "Leave it to me," had triggered Dimensional Drift, the ultimate ability of Yoru, an agent in the game VALORANT, also known as Valorant, and sent him into a dimensional rift.

"It seems... what you need most right now is to figure out what triggers your ability." Lacerta shook her head. "Unfortunately, I'm no expert in that field. Perhaps another professor can help you."

"You must be exhausted after traveling all the way from Huanglong to Lahai-Roi by boat. Go back to your dorm, don't stay up late, and get some rest."

After saying goodbye to Lacerta, Lu Guan felt as though a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

Once he returned to his newly assigned dorm and got himself settled, he sent his parents back in Huanglong a message to let them know everything was all right.

After hesitating for a while, he also sent messages to Yangyang in Jinzhou and Suisui, whose current whereabouts he didn't know.

There was a long delay on international messages, so he probably wouldn't get a reply anytime soon. Lu Guan simply took off his coat, flopped onto his bed, and called up the system interface to review everything he had gained recently.

[Beep! Eligible characters detected. Add them to the romanceable character list?]

"Add them."

[Beep! Character list updated. Please check-]

[Characters added: Lacerta, Mornye, Lu Hes.]

[Lacerta]

[Current affection: 12]

[Opinion of the host: A good kid who learns from his mistakes.]

[Mornye]

[Current affection: 3]

[Opinion of the host: His resonance ability is intriguing.]

[Lu Hes]

[Current affection: 2]

[Opinion of the host: Interesting...]

"I didn't expect affection to be so hard to raise..." Lu Guan sighed. "But at least none of them are negative. That's a good start."

[Beep! Notice: A character bond is available for activation!]

"A bond?" Lu Guan asked. "Like the kind in an auto battler... or something else?"

[Host's question received. System analyzing...]

[Beep! Answer: The host's description is apt. Simply gather enough romanceable characters to meet a bond's requirements to activate it. Activating bonds or fulfilling conditions can grant buffs.]

"Then... activate it!"

Lu Guan had originally thought the bonds would be things like "Stardust Academy," "Order of the Deep," or "Huanglong Court."

Instead...

[Beep! Bond activated: Peerless Twin Figures.]

"Wh-what the hell?" Lu Guan looked at Suisui and Lacerta's portraits in the bond list and screamed inwardly.

"Seriously, bro? This is the kind of bond you meant?!"

There was so much to complain about that Lu Guan didn't even know where to start.

After a long while, he could only get one sentence out.

"Then why not add Changli too? When it comes to figures, those two together might not even be able to compete with Changli, right?"

[Analyzing host's request...]

[Beep! Analysis result: Reasonable.]

[Bond revised: Peerless Twin Figures → Earthshaking Three Figures]

[Bond list updated-]

[Bond: Earthshaking Three Figures]

[Changli, Lacerta, Suisui]

[Effect: When the host activates his resonance ability using a dark joke, its effect will be slightly enhanced.]

"How much is slightly enhanced?" Lu Guan wanted to test the buff, but he couldn't think of a suitable dark joke on the spot.

Besides, he was a fairly decent person himself. Even if he knew some particularly dark jokes, he wouldn't just say them out loud.

Unless he couldn't help himself.

"Since it's come to this... I'll sleep first!"

Life at Stardust Academy wasn't particularly dull, but Lu Guan knew what his resonance ability was like, so he couldn't quite let loose.

The dorm, the library, the dining hall, the classroom building.

Just like an ordinary university student, he spent his days studying whenever he wasn't eating or sleeping, occasionally holing up in his dorm to play video games.

But as the old saying went:

When the kids are quiet, they're up to no good.

Lu Guan, whom Yangyang called a demon child, was restless to the core. Although Lacerta's words could keep his restless heart in check for a short time, his resonance ability wouldn't listen to reason.

One day, while eating in the dining hall, Lu Guan took a bite of a Stardust Academy specialty and couldn't help complaining in a New Federation accent, "Oh my God, this damn taste is just like an old sock forgotten in the fireplace!"

And so, all the food on the trays of the students eating in the dining hall at the time turned into stinky socks baked stiff by a fire.

"Blergh-what is this? Blergh-"

"Ugh... who the fuck put this thing on my plate?"

Seeing trouble brewing, Lu Guan took advantage of the others frantically looking for places to throw up and ran for it.

"Nigerundayo!!!"

Unfortunately for Lu Guan, his resonance ability activated again. His movement speed increased dramatically without warning, and as a result, he couldn't control his body at first. His momentum sent him crashing headfirst into the infirmary window.

Lu Hes: ???

Although Lu Guan's sudden attack startled him, the experienced Lu Hes had long since grown accustomed to the academy's extraordinary students.

He shook his head and chuckled, then called the medical robot N.A.N.A to help him peel Lu Guan off the glass.

The two of them helped Lu Guan into the infirmary and sat him down. Only then did Lu Hes lean over and smile as he repeatedly waved his slender fingers in front of Lu Guan's unfocused eyes.

"How do you feel?"

"Can you still tell? Tell me... how many is this?"

"This is... the Great Sage Equal to Heaven was here...?"

"Very good." Lu Hes flicked Lu Guan on the forehead in exasperation. "If you can joke at a time like this, it seems you haven't damaged your brain."

"Ow."

Although Lu Hes hadn't flicked him very hard, Lu Guan still covered his head by reflex.

"Hehehe... Doctor Lu." Lu Guan gave him a fawning smile. "Can I hide out here for a bit?"

"Hm?" Lu Hes immediately became alert and leaned back tactically. Remembering the file on Lu Guan that Lacerta had sent him a few days ago, he blurted out, "What did you do this time?"

"It's... nothing much." Lu Guan scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "I just accidentally... turned all the food in the dining hall into stinky socks that hadn't been washed for three days and had been baked dry in a fireplace, with the stench of sweat and burning fabric both present and even starting to blend together..."

"Stop, stop! I said stop!" Lu Hes cut Lu Guan off with a look of disgust. He felt that if he let Lu Guan continue, he would start describing how the things tasted.

"I really don't think you need to describe them so vividly..."

"I just... wanted you to understand how serious the problem is..."

"I understand perfectly well now, but you really didn't need to come here to hide." Lu Hes shook his head. "Stardust Academy isn't the Court. Even if something this strange happened, no one would recognize you as the one who did it."

"How should I put it... You should have realized it clearly during your days here. The atmosphere at the academy is rather... open and free."

"To tell you the truth... Before you came along, some students from the agriculture department put untested new food products straight into the dining hall vending machines to cut down on testing costs..."

"That indirectly caused four hundred students to suffer food poisoning. What you did is only this much, so you really don't need to worry too much."

"Besides, I believe any normal person would never eat a plate of stinky socks baked dry..."

Just as Lu Guan was about to say something else, a commotion arose outside the infirmary.

"Doctor Hes! Quick! Someone has food poisoning!"

Lu Hes hurried forward to check and questioned the person who had come.

"What did he eat?"

"The... the socks on a plate in the dining hall..." The student who had brought the patient in looked a little embarrassed. "He thought they were a new sock-shaped food developed by the agriculture department, so he ate them out of curiosity..."

"Even Dania wouldn't eat those..."

"Hm???"

Lu Hes whipped around to look at Lu Guan.

At that moment, the student with food poisoning spoke up. "There's an old saying in Huanglong: smells bad, tastes good... and sure enough..."

With that, he stood up as though nothing were wrong, gave the crowd a roguish smile, and raised a thumb.

"My verdict... top tier! I recommend everyone give it a try!"

Then he promptly passed out and collapsed, unconscious.

The student who had brought him in ranted, "Hey! This is no time to pretend you're fine and trick the other students!"

Lu Hes put a hand to his forehead and instructed helplessly, "N.A.N.A, arrange for this student to have his stomach pumped..."