Big White's Dog Brain

"Big White! Go!" Chen Song lay on his chair and threw a pine nut into the distance.

Chen Song was used to being lazy, so he made a rocking chair himself. Of course, he also gave one to each of his three beloved masters, though they might not use them.

They were all busy in seclusion. They weren't as lazy as Chen Song. They also told Chen Song to calm down and cultivate properly, but it was all for naught.

Chen Song's original words were: "Cultivation has no end, so one cannot rush success!"

His true thought was: If he worked hard to cultivate, why would he need to rely on others?

"Woof!" A white lightning bolt shot out with a "swoosh," precisely catching the pine nut in mid-air. After a crisp crunch, Big White trotted back happily.

"Boss, another one!" A dog is a dog! So easily amused!

In the cowshed next to the thatched hut, two cows were diligently feasting. However, they weren't eating spiritual fruits, but rather the failed elixirs or dregs from Laozi's alchemy.

But one thing Chen Song hadn't lied about when tricking the two cows was that they'd be fed well!

The Kui Niu chewed on the elixir dregs and said to the Green Ox, "Old Green, why is Young Master so... leisurely all day? Why don't Master and Tongtian Master pay much attention to him?"

The Green Ox slowly ruminated and replied calmly, "Moo. How can we mounts fathom the thoughts of our superiors? Perhaps this kind of 'leisure' is itself a form of cultivation?"

The Kui Niu seemed to understand but not understand. It snorted and continued to eat. As long as it was fed, that was all that mattered!

In short, Chen Song was bored to death.

After being brought back and breaking through to Grand Unity Golden Immortal, Chen Song had done everything imaginable day after day.

For example, Chen Song felt that Big White couldn't just catch pine nuts and wag its tail, so he started training it to "treasure hunt." He secretly buried a bead containing spiritual energy in a corner of the back mountain and let Big White find it. Big White, with its dog nose, dug it up in no time and excitedly brought it back to claim its reward.

Chen Song was overjoyed. He rewarded it with three pine nuts and announced, "From now on, we'll get rich with this trick! Go find those hidden heavenly treasures! You're the one, Treasure Hunting Dog!"

However, Big White's "treasure hunting" standard quickly skewed towards "finding food." What it brought back wasn't buried Yao Beast bones or spiritual fruits hidden by certain birds; it never found any truly valuable treasures.

"I've never seen a dog as greedy as you! If you don't find me some spiritual treasures soon, I'll slaughter you and make dog meat hot pot with my masters!" Chen Song threatened.

"Woof! Boss, you can't blame me for this! If this were the Great Wilderness, I guarantee I'd find you lots of spiritual treasures!" Big White's dog face was full of grievance.

"Then what do you want? As soon as we dare to leave Kunlun Mountain, my masters will snatch us back in the next second," Chen Song spread his hands.

"Woof! Why don't you just cultivate properly, Boss!"

"No, no, no, cultivate? Cultivate my ass!"

However, these words came from Big White's mouth, which made him realize that Big White had been following him for so long, yet its cultivation hadn't improved much! It had also eaten so much with him that even a pig would have broken through by now.

"No," Chen Song slapped his thigh. "Just because I don't cultivate doesn't mean you don't have to! I can't let you degenerate like this! How can my dog be a weakling? Where would that leave my reputation?"

When Big White heard this, it puffed out its chest and said in human speech, "Boss! I don't like what you're saying! I'm playing dumb to be smart, accumulating strength for a powerful breakthrough! Besides, all my talent points are invested in tracking (food), and cultivation is a slow and meticulous process!"

"Meticulous? I think you're not doing anything at all!" Chen Song grabbed it by the scruff of its neck. "No, I can't let you degenerate further! I need to find you a proper cultivation method to improve your cultivation, or it will be embarrassing to take you out!"

He bustled along, dragging Big White towards where Laozi was in seclusion.

"Master! Master! Your disciple seeks an audience! It concerns your grand-disciple... ah, no, your dog-disciple's lifelong path!"

Laozi's expression was calm. Chen Song quickly pushed Big White forward. "Master, look, Big White isn't bad, is it? It's just that its cultivation is lagging, which disgraces our Taiqing. Please be merciful and bestow upon it an introductory cultivation technique to guide it?"

Laozi's gaze swept over Big White and he said faintly, "Too much cleverness, not enough stillness." With that, he still sent out a wisp of clear light, and the Taiqing Still Heart Nourish Qi Chapter entered Big White's mind.

Returning to the thatched hut, Chen Song urged, "Quick! Try it! Master's personal transmission!"

Big White sat down properly like a person and began to chant, "To the utmost emptiness, adhere to stillness... all things arise together, I observe their return... exhale... ZZZZ..."

In less than three breaths, its snores were like thunder.

Chen Song was so angry he kicked it. "Stupid dog! Are you chanting scriptures or trying to hypnotize me?"

Big White woke up with a start, wiping its drool, and said aggrievedly, "Boss, you can't blame me for this! When I recite this technique, it's like listening to a lullaby. My brain just doesn't listen! Others learn things with their minds but not their hands and feet; I can't even get my mind to work!"

"Hopeless! The Taiqing methods are too profound; your dog brain can't handle it!" Chen Song said with heartfelt pain. "Come on, let's go find Second Martial Uncle! Yuqing immortal arts emphasize rules the most, which is perfect for curing your undisciplined nature!"

Outside the Jade Void Palace, Lord of the Beginning frowned after hearing the request. "Nonsense! How can my Yuqing lineage be accessed by a creature with fur and horns? This beast's temperament is restless and incapable of great responsibility!"

Chen Song pleaded and cajoled, and only then did Yuanshi reluctantly pass down a technique, the Yuqing Condense Heart Sculpt Origin Art, emphasizing adherence to rules and the sculpting of the Primordial Spirit.

As a result, Big White immediately yelped when it tried it. "No, no, no! Boss! I feel so uncomfortable. When I practice, it's like my whole body is tied up with ropes, suffocating! I want to run wild! I want to run in circles!"

It indeed started spinning in circles irritably, almost tripping Chen Song.

Lord of the Beginning saw this unruly scene in the water mirror, his face turned ashen, and with a flick of his sleeve, he directly sent the man and dog away from him. "Forget it! You two go find the Third Brother. I can't teach it!"

Chen Song was dejected. Looking at Big White, which was still chasing its own tail, he gritted his teeth. "Rules? You can't even control your own tail!"

Finally, they arrived at Sect Master Tongtian's place. Tongtian was straightforward. "Haha, eloquence is also a talent! My Shangqing Spirit Induction Body Forging Technique is the most direct. It draws in qi to temper the body, which is perfect for it!"

This time, Big White seemed energized and frantically drew in spiritual energy. Its body swelled like an inflated ball, floating in the air, and it shouted, "Boss! I feel full of power! I'm going to transform!"

The next second, the spiritual energy went out of control, and with a "poof," it deflated and fell on its back.

"Ouch... Boss, this spiritual energy doesn't listen to orders. It comes and goes as it pleases. I'm getting motion sickness..." Big White lay on the ground, seeing stars.

Sect Master Tongtian cupped his forehead. "I'm out of ideas too."

After three consecutive failures, Chen Song looked at Big White, which had collapsed into a dog pancake, and was completely despairing. He sighed, lay back in his rocking chair, and weakly called out, "Big White."

"Woof! Boss! What are your orders?" Big White instantly revived, wagging its tail as it came closer.

"Go!"

A pine nut flew out.

The white lightning bolt caught it with precision as always, crunching it with a crisp sound before happily trotting back for praise.

Chen Song looked at its carefree, joyful demeanor, rubbed its dog head, and laughed, "Forget it. Just stay a silly dog."

Big White mumbled through a mouthful of pine nut, "Exactly, boss! Training is so tiring for a dog! I'll just be your mount. My back is pretty soft, right? If anything really happens, don't you still have your three masters? I'll just be responsible for shouting 'Boss, help!' a little louder!"

Chen Song: "...I suddenly feel like dog meat hot pot might actually be worth considering."