Better to Give Birth to a Raw Yorkshire Pudding Than a Bastard Like You
Sirius was very curious about who the Hufflepuff ghost following Harry was, but the carriage was about to depart, so he didn't ask any further questions.
Once they were on the carriage, seeing everyone's curious looks, Sirius finally asked, "Harry, aren't you going to introduce your new friend to us?"
"A new friend?" Harry was stunned; he didn't understand what Sirius meant.
He followed Sirius and everyone else's gaze and saw Pabbie in his ghost form.
It then dawned on me that Pabbie had always been known as Unicorn, so it was understandable that people didn't recognize her.
"Oh, you mean her?" Harry said with a laugh. "Haven't you met her before? Especially you, Sirius, how could you not recognize her?"
"Yes, how could you not recognize me?" Pabbie chimed in, hands on her hips, following Harry's lead.
Upon hearing that familiar voice, everyone realized that the ghost lady was Pabbie!
"You're Pabbie?!" Hermione asked in surprise, covering her mouth.
"It's no secret," Cassandra said, rubbing her forehead. "Although she's a ghost now, she's actually the real Pabbie ..."
"My God, how could you..." Ron asked in disbelief, "How could you be a ghost? Aren't you Unicorn? Why have you become a ghost? Are all ghost forms of Unicorn human?"
"Are you stupid?" Hermione gave Ron a helpless look. "How could Unicorn's ghost form be human? It's obviously Unicorn, okay... It seems Miss Pabbie must have some secret..."
Upon hearing Hermione's words, everyone turned to look at Pabbie.
"Yes," Pabbie said, shaking his head. "This is the consequence of practicing magical Margus —so, you shouldn't practice magical Margus, what if you end up like me?"
"Magical Margus?" Ron scratched his head, encountering a problem he didn't understand.
"The term 'magical Margus ' refers to someone who wants to become Magical Creatures through the Animagus," Hermione sighed. "It's safe to say that even a normal Animagus carries considerable risk, let alone magical Margus."
"So this is the consequence?" Sirius glanced at Pabbie, finding it hard to believe that the kind-hearted Unicorn Lady was actually a ghost.
She witnessed the whole thing—me eating the Giant Spider!
"This is the consequence." Pabbie chuckled silently, leaning against Harry. "Mr. LeMay —yes, the legendary Alchemy Nicolas Flamel —suggested that I spend more time with Harry because he absorbed the Philosopher's Stone in his first year. I'll also gradually nourish my body through contact with Harry, so I can return to human time, right, Harry?"
As she said this, Pabbie looked up and gave Harry a sweet smile.
Sirius was stunned.
Sirius was overjoyed!
Oh my god!
Isn't this like a pillow coming right when you're sleepy?
In other words, how could Harry be poisoned by two Slytherin women?
You absolutely must choose Pabbie from Hufflepuff...
Look at Miss Ghost's eyes, they're practically stretchy... much stretchier than mozzarella cheese.
I believe, I absolutely believe, that if Lily were still alive, she would definitely choose Pabbie from Hufflepuff, wouldn't she?
Sirius was indulging in wishful thinking, completely unaware that if Lily were still alive, seeing Harry's ambiguous relationship with his teacher, she would proudly proclaim, "This is my good son!"
Cassandra, standing to the side, showed a look of disgust. Of course she knew that this donkey... Unicorn Lady... Miss Ghost liked Harry, but it wasn't enough to throw her out of the carriage over such a small matter.
But we still have to make a statement, and we must express our dislike.
Whose stupid donkey is this?!
"I really didn't expect Harry to be so popular with girls," Sirius said with a grin, adding, "I remember Miss Grindelwald liked Harry a lot, didn't she? And Miss Sweeting... oh right, Miss Malfoy too..."
"Oh, I advise you not to fill your brain with pink bubbles, Uncle Black." Cassandra deliberately emphasized the word "uncle," meaning to remind Sirius that as an uncle, he should watch his words.
But if Veratia were here, she would definitely understand Cassandra's underlying meaning.
only...
The people in the carriage Gryffindor, and there was also a Hufflepuff. Expecting them to understand these convoluted words with their simple minds was a bit too much to ask.
"Alright, Padfoot," Professor Lupin said with a yawn, "Miss Malfoy is right. How can you, as an elder, speak ill of the younger generation like that?"
"Hey, I've become an elder, haven't I?" Sirius was clearly still not quite at the level of an elder—after all, he had spent the missing twelve years in Azkaban, and in his life, he was still stuck at the time when he had just graduated twelve years ago.
Just as Lily often said, besides James and Harry, she had a third son— Sirius.
"Then if you're not an elder, what are you?" Lupin glanced at him and said.
"Oh, by the way," Sirius began, changing the subject, "Miss Malfoy, I don't recall Lucius Malfoy having a daughter. May I ask who your father is...?"
"Septimus," Cassandra said without any attempt to hide it, "My father is Septimus Malfoy."
Septimus Malfoy?
Sirius felt the name sounded familiar, but he couldn't remember where he had heard it before.
"I do seem to have heard of a Malfoy, but I can't remember where," Sirius shrugged. "Well, I was just asking, not trying to pry—so, Miss Sweeting, what kind of materials would you need to be resurrected?"
"Mr. LeMay is searching," Pabbie said with a smile. "I remember he found a very suitable spell, but it takes time to brew the Potions... If I'm being precise, it should be around February next year? I'm not entirely sure."
"Then isn't it almost here?" Sirius said with a chuckle, then looked at Harry. "You'd better spend as much time as possible with Miss Sweeting lately, lest you delay the resurrection, or make sure it's not too bad, what do you say, Harry?"
Sirius practically wanted his godson to be glued to Pabbie all the time. In his eyes, Hufflepuff girls, though not romantic, were reliable and dependable, making them perfect wives...
No, it should be said that Hufflepuff girls are the best choice for a good wife and mother.
She's elegant enough to grace a formal occasion and equally adept at Kitchen; how could we possibly expect a woman like Young Lady Malfoy to Kitchen?
Sirius couldn't quite imagine Cassandra Kitchen, perhaps even making snake soup for Harry?
Really...
Hmph!
Cassandra forced a smile; she wanted to say something, but held back.
Never mind, Harry's here; he's his Godfather dog.
We still need to give him some face...
"How much longer until we get there?" she asked casually.
"Soon," said Sirius. "I haven't been back in ages. I haven't been home since I came out of Azkaban —you probably don't know what kind of woman my mother is, oh my god..."
"What's it like?" Ron asked with interest.
"Oh ho," Sirius didn't even need to imagine before giving a very fitting description. "A despicable shrew."
"How could you talk about your own mother like that?" Hermione said, frowning.
Sirius wasn't angry. He simply raised a finger and said, "You're making judgments without understanding my mother. If you can still say that in a moment, I'll accept your criticism."
"Oh." Hermione nodded and said nothing more.
She was still wondering to herself, what kind of mother could make her son hate her so much?
I'm actually kind of looking forward to it.
The carriage flew very fast, and in less than half an hour, it arrived at the gate of Grimmauld Place, Number 12.
The front door of the house seemed to have not been repaired for a long time and looked somewhat dilapidated. When Sirius pushed the door open, the door collapsed to the ground with a "bang".
Almost simultaneously, a House Elf appeared before them.
The House Elf was almost completely naked except for a dirty rag around his waist; his skin seemed to be several times more than his body actually needed, his head was bald, but his two large, bat-like ears were covered with a lot of white fur, his eyes were bloodshot and gray, and his fleshy nose was so big that it looked like a pig's snout.
"It's Kritcher," Sirius announced to everyone, "the Black family home's House Elf."
Unexpectedly, Kritcher opened his weak eyes, looked up at Sirius with a disdainful and disgusted expression.
"Look, the beastly young master who betrayed the Black family home is back. He actually has the nerve to come back. If the mistress sees this, she'll scold Kritcher again for accepting such a traitor who has abandoned the family."
Kritcher spoke in his bullfrog-like hoarse voice, bending even lower and muttering to his knees.
"Oh!" Hermione gave Kritcher a complicated look and whispered to Ron, "He used really foul language..."
"There's something even dirtier," Sirius said, seemingly used to Kritcher's attitude. "Let's tidy up the house. My godson's friends and I are going back here for Christmas, understand, Kritcher?"
As he spoke, Sirius introduced Kritcher: "This is my friend, Lupin —you've met him before. And this is my godson, Harry Potter. These are his friends: Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Pabbie Sweeting ..."
Kritcher looked up and glanced at it.
"I knew it. That young master who betrayed his Pure-blood would stoop to this level, returning to my mistress's old house with the blood-traitor Weasley and a Mudblood... and a ghost too?"
"Hey, watch your mouth!" Ron said, somewhat annoyed.
Kritcher didn't argue, but muttered reluctantly, "Hufflepuff, Gryffindor, oh dear..."
However, all of this came to an abrupt end when he saw Cassandra.
His eyes suddenly lit up.
"And who is this esteemed Slytherin?" he asked.
"Cassandra," Sirius said, "Cassandra Malfoy."
"So it's the esteemed young lady of the Malfoy family." Kritcher's eyes lit up. "It seems the traitorous young master hasn't completely fallen from grace; at least he knows how to befriend Slytherin..."
"She's not my friend, she's my godson's best friend..." Sirius quickly defended himself, seemingly unwilling to have even the slightest connection with any Slytherin.
"It seems Young Master Potter has a good eye, much better than his beastly Godfather." Kritcher bowed deeply to Harry and Cassandra. "Welcome, Young Master Potter and Miss Malfoy —please come in, Kritcher welcomes you."
Sirius took a breath.
Never mind, never mind...
"I'm sorry." Sirius turned to Hermione and Ron and said, "You know the Black family home is a bit extreme, and I'm really sorry for causing you trouble."
"It's nothing." Hermione was just curious and not angry— Ron was the same.
As they walked into Black family home, Harry felt an Grim premonition as soon as he stepped through the front door.
Just as he expected, a roar came from the wall.
"Sirius Black!" the portrait on the wall roared, "How dare you come back! You Pure-blood traitor, worse than an animal! You dog! I regret ever giving birth to you; I'd rather have given birth to a Yorkshire pudding than a bastard like you!"
"My God, my holy mother!" Hermione was startled by the roar and instinctively jumped up.
Sirius turned back and wagged his finger at Hermione, correcting her mistake. "No, no, no, it's my not-so-holy mother."
"You disgrace to Pure-blood! You maggot-infested scum, how dare you bring your Mudblood to my house..."
Mrs. Black was still demonstrating her vocabulary, trying to use verbal attacks to get Sirius to leave the house.
Seeing Mrs. Black like this, Hermione showed an understanding expression.
"I'm sorry, Sirius." Hermione looked up and gazed sincerely at Sirius.
She swore that if she had a mother like that, she probably would have jumped off the sixth floor long ago.
"Now you know how formidable my mother is?" Sirius shrugged, nonchalantly saying, "She used Permanent Sticking Charm to stick her portrait here, and I can't throw her out... So let's try to avoid her for the next couple of days, to avoid being verbally attacked by her..."
Just when everyone thought Mrs. Black was about to continue her tirade, Phineas Black suddenly appeared in her portrait.
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