For Fred and George, there had never been a more wonderful day, because their idol, Horatio, was going to live with them for a while.
Although they had joined the campaign against Horatio last term, they had actually admired him deeply. They had even formed a Horatio fan club.
Horatio was naturally very pleased with his two little fans. Since it was inconvenient for him to pull off anything major at the Weasley family home, he helped the twins improve their prank props instead.
Watching the three of them hang around together every day, Ron felt a jolt in his heart. He had a bad feeling that something unpleasant was about to happen.
Sure enough, a scream shattered the morning silence. When Ron came downstairs for breakfast, he found a swarm of spiders crawling all over the dining table.
"Mom, why are there spiders on the table?" Ron's face turned pale with fright.
Molly casually grabbed one and tossed it into her mouth. "These are spider chocolate cookies Fred and George made under Horatio's guidance."
Chewing on the spider, Molly said, "They taste pretty good. Want to try one?" She then picked one up and held it out to Ron.
Ron rolled his eyes back in terror and fainted.
"Hmph, coward." Molly carried Ron back to his room, then grabbed another one and popped it into her mouth. "Mm, delicious."
Upstairs, Horatio and the twins were secretly watching it all. Seeing Ron faint from fright, George said, "Yes, phase one of the plan succeeded."
They then sneaked into Ron's room and poured a bottle of potion into his mouth. Under the potion's effects, red fur began sprouting all over Ron's body. Before long, the long red hair had wrapped him up completely, leaving only his two eyes exposed.
"Holy crap, a red-furred monster. Why does this feel kind of creepy?" Horatio shivered as he looked at Ron on the bed, then quickly dragged George and Fred away from the scene. Before leaving, they also swapped out Ron's shoes.
Ron slowly woke up. His whole body itched unbearably. When he focused his eyes, he saw that he was covered in red fur. Then he looked in the mirror and burst into tears at the sight of himself.
He put on his shoes and prepared to go downstairs to find Molly, but the moment he took a step, he realized something was wrong. There was not the slightest bit of friction on the soles.
"Thud." Ron did a perfect split and immediately burst into tears from the pain.
Hearing the commotion, Molly went upstairs to investigate. At Ron's bedroom door, she found a red-furred gorilla clutching its crotch and rolling around on the floor.
"Who are you? Why are you in little Ron's room?" Molly drew her magic wand and warily stared at the red-furred ape.
"Mom, it's me."
"Little Ron, how did you end up like this?" Molly hurriedly put away her magic wand and stepped forward to inspect him.
"I don't know."
In Fred and George's room, Horatio and the twins watched everything through a fly they had planted in advance.
"Hahahahaha!" The three of them clutched their stomachs and laughed until they could barely breathe. Ron's split in particular nearly killed them with laughter.
Naturally, the three were punished. Molly came into their room, gave them a vicious scolding, and confiscated all their prank props.
George and Fred were a little dejected, so Horatio comforted them. "Professor McGonagall confiscated quite a few of my things last term too. But what good did it do? As long as I make them faster than she can confiscate them, there's nothing she can do to me."
The twins thought that made perfect sense, so they immediately began making new prank props with Horatio.
While making props with them, Horatio realized that they were both quite talented in Alchemy and potions. He began gradually teaching them some basic enchanting and rune inscription techniques.
The twins were deeply moved. On the spot, they pulled Horatio over and declared themselves sworn brothers. Thus, the Sleeping Lice Duo, who would one day shake Hogwarts and become Professor McGonagall's lifelong nemesis, was born.
A few days later, Hogwarts' acceptance letter arrived for Horatio. When he opened the envelope, he was dumbfounded. Holy crap, why were there so many books? Breaking with Banshees, Wandering with Ghouls, Voyages with Vampires, and more. Their author was all the same person: Gilderoy Lockhart.
Horatio decided that since this guy was supposedly so amazing, he should let him experience what it felt like to stare into a Basilisk's eyes this year.
Molly said it was fortunate that Dumbledore had given them a bag of Galleons earlier, or they would not even know what to do now.
That evening, Horatio received a letter from Hermione. After Dumbledore had sent him to the Burrow, Horatio had asked Nephthys to deliver Hermione a letter boasting about how Mafalda, the head of the Ministry of Magic's Improper Use of Magic Office, had praised him.
Hermione's reply hit the nail on the head. She directly asked whether he had done something and been arrested by the Ministry of Magic, then invited him to buy textbooks with her on Wednesday. She also asked him to explain what he meant by wanting to see her family's helipad.
"Tch, if you tell me to go on Wednesday, I'll go on Wednesday? I'm going on Thursday instead," Horatio muttered to himself.
"Horatio, Hermione just wrote back to me. She invited us to buy textbooks together on Wednesday. Ron's family and I discussed it, and we decided to take the Floo Network to Diagon Alley together on Wednesday." Harry pushed open Horatio's bedroom door. "Molly said she's taking you too."
"What's wrong with you?" Harry asked, looking at the ash-gray Horatio.
"I might be a little dead."
"???"
On Wednesday, Molly picked up a flowerpot from the kitchen mantel and walked over to the fireplace. She said to everyone beside her, "Harry and Horatio have never used Floo Powder before. Fred, you go first and demonstrate."
Fred pinched a handful of powder from the flowerpot, stepped into the fireplace, threw the powder into the flames, and shouted, "Diagon Alley!" Green flames rose up, and he vanished in an instant.
"You have to say those words clearly," Mrs. Weasley told Harry and Horatio, then had George demonstrate as well.
Imitating Fred and George's movements, Harry grabbed a pinch of powder and stepped into the fireplace. He shouted, "Toe Jam!" before throwing the powder into the fire and disappearing.
Molly turned around and asked, "Did you hear clearly what he said?"
Horatio immediately raised his hand. "I know, I know. He said, 'Toe Jam.'"
Arthur grabbed a handful of powder and said to Molly, "I'll go find Harry. Molly, take the children to Diagon Alley first."
He then threw the powder into the fireplace and shouted, "Toe Jam!"
"Horatio, your turn. Make sure you don't say it wrong." Molly held the flowerpot out to Horatio.
Horatio nodded, threw the Floo Powder into the fireplace, and shouted, "Diagon Alley!"
After a dizzying whirl, Horatio stepped out of the fireplace and braced himself against the wall. "Bleurgh—"
"Why is wizard teleportation magic always so awful? Bleurgh—" Horatio nearly threw up the sandwich he had eaten that morning.
[Detected that the host is dissatisfied with the Wizarding world's teleportation magic. The system has requested a book from a colleague at Kamar-Taj, How to Draw a Perfect Circle to Open a Door, and is now issuing it to the host.]
"Buddy, you're still the reliable one. Bleurgh—"
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