Long-Awaited Tears / A New Stage, New Tears, and New Songs

"That Band? What's that?" Although she felt something was off, Kita still asked.

That was enough. Shiko closed her eyes, then slowly opened them again. Her face was expressionless now. She handed the notebook back to Ichiri and turned to leave.

"Shiko?" Ichiri took the notebook but didn't look at it, staring blankly in the direction Shiko had left.

Ichiri put the notebook back on the table and chased after her. The open page displayed the title: Guitar and Loneliness and the Blue Planet.

Shiko kept walking. She didn't know where she should stop, either. When she came to herself, she was standing amid a field of rubble.

A meteor streaked across the night sky.

Chapter 27: Long-Awaited Tears

October 2022.

"What makes this show so memorable is its masterful portrayal of the female protagonist's social anxiety..."

A new-anime review by a content creator was playing on the laptop screen. The reviewer's final recommendation was a music anime called Bocchi the Rock!. Shiko—though she didn't have that name yet—was sitting in front of the computer.

"Social anxiety... Maybe I'll give it a look?" she muttered to herself.

After entering her third year of high school, she didn't have much time to watch anime. She had only followed one or two of the shows airing in October, and Bocchi the Rock! wasn't among them.

"I haven't really watched many music anime before..." Shiko found a source, downloaded it, and started playing it.

Within the first five minutes of the first episode, she had fallen in love with Hitori. Like most other viewers who loved BTR, she thought, This is practically another me!

The exceptional animation, the cute yet realistic girls, and the somewhat unhinged antics.

She joined the ranks of weekly viewers. Today, she had reached the fifth episode.

"Dinner's—ready—!" Mom shouted from the kitchen. It wouldn't hurt to eat a little later. She wanted to finish watching first. "In a—minute—!" she shouted back.

Ah, Bocchi-chan looked so cute drenched in sweat, and Nijika looked so cute when she was sulking...

Kessoku Band went to audition at Starry, and they began performing their first original song.

Guitar and Loneliness and the Blue Planet.

"空のご機嫌なんか知らない" (I don't care what kind of mood the sky is in.)

"Dinner's—ready—!" Mom called again, refusing to give up.

""ありのまま"なんて 谁に见せるんだ" ("Who am I showing my 'true self' to?")

Huh...

"空気を握って 空を殴るよ" (I clench the air and punch the sky.)

What was going on...

"なんにも起きない わたしは无力さ" (Nothing happens. I'm so powerless.)

Powerful footsteps approached from a distance. The laptop screen snapped shut.

"I told you to come eat! Did you hear me?" As usual, Mom roared furiously, angry about something or other.

Shiko continued staring blankly at the laptop's blank screen, at the empty wall.

When she came to herself, Shiko had already bought the same T-shirt as Kessoku Band.

The next time she came to herself, Shiko was excitedly waving a glow stick and cheering for different girls in front of the screen. With a passion completely unlike before, she threw herself into all kinds of band anime and idol anime. Before she knew it, her room had been packed with colorful merchandise.

One day, Shiko was playing music in her room when Mom passed by. "It sounds awful, just like someone chanting sutras," she said with a frown.

Shiko didn't care. If anything, she had long since grown used to comments like that.

As long as the girls' songs were perfect in her heart, that was enough.

That's right.

"Kessoku Band... is already perfect..." Shiko waved her hands as she kicked furiously at the chaotic metal spikes embedded in the ground, not feeling the slightest bit of pain. "It was... perfect... Why...!"

"Why!" she roared at the empty wilderness. She couldn't even hear an echo.

Shiko crouched down and curled herself up.

When was the last time she had been like this? Ten years ago? It hadn't been quite that long, but at least eight or nine years, right?

Why? Why was she never like this in the life she had led in her previous existence, yet here, with the girls she loved most, she was...!

After a long while, she heard a voice.

"Shiko." She raised her head. A blurry pink shadow was swaying before her. Soon, the shadow overlapped and formed a person.

"...Hitori." She saw Hitori standing in front of her, shrinking back timidly.

Hitori wanted to ask Shiko what was wrong, why she had suddenly become like this, and whether the lyrics she had written had upset her...

But she couldn't ask a single question. Shiko stood up without saying anything.

Shiko merely walked past her. "Let's go back." Her voice held no emotion.

The two of them said nothing on the way back. Shiko kept her eyes on the stone path beneath her feet to avoid falling.

Shiko pushed open the door to CiRCLE. Hitori hurried a few steps to catch up, and Shiko stopped to hold the door for her. Only at that distance did Hitori notice Shiko's reddened eyes.

"Was it... my lyrics? Did they upset you?" Hitori finally asked cautiously.

"..." Shiko didn't answer, but her footsteps stopped.

A heavy atmosphere filled the air.

"No." Shiko finally replied, then continued walking inside.

Hitori caught hold of her sleeve.

"Why are you running away, Shiko? You suddenly became so strange... If it's because of me..."

"If it's because of you, would you change the lyrics into what I wanted?"

Shiko roughly cut her off. At last, she turned around and faced Hitori directly.

Faced with that question, Hitori hesitated.

Shiko walked to the window, turning her back to Hitori.

She made her decision.

"Hitori, do you know about the box theory?" she asked. Hitori was somewhat surprised by the strange question.

"Suppose we had a computer with infinite processing power. We could use it to create a world similar to ours, yet different. That world would have humans like us. They would live just as we do and take that world's existence for granted. Stories would arise in their lives, and people outside the computer would record those stories, turning them into anime, novels, and movies."

She turned toward Hitori. "I come from outside the computer."

Hitori didn't understand the science fiction Shiko had suddenly begun talking about.

"A box? A computer? What..." Hitori carefully processed it before she could initially grasp what Shiko meant.

"You mean you're saying you're a transmigrator?"

Shiko looked into Hitori's eyes. "Yes. Kessoku Band is a band from the world of Bocchi the Rock!, and CiRCLE is a live house from the world of the Bang Dream project. Do you believe me?"

Hitori nodded trustingly. "Shiko wouldn't lie to me." She didn't hesitate at all.

Shiko turned her head away so Hitori wouldn't see the self-loathing on her face. The more Hitori trusted her, the more she regretted it.

"Originally, Kessoku Band's second song was called That Band. The song you wrote wasn't supposed to exist. At the band's first live, everyone was too nervous and didn't perform the first song well. You saved the show in time, performing an incredible solo during the intro to That Band, and made that live a huge success." Recalling the eighth episode of Bocchi the Rock!, the corners of Shiko's mouth curled up unconsciously.

"I don't like changes. Changes mean that old things disappear. Stage Girls always have new stages, but what about the old ones? Where did all the old ones go?" Her tone grew increasingly agitated, as if she were questioning fate.

Without caring whether Hitori could understand, she poured out everything in one breath. "This world wasn't supposed to exist. You were supposed to keep living in the real world. It was because I came here that this world appeared inside the computer, and that you were dragged into it by me. A long time has probably passed in reality by now. You may have already missed the timing of your first live. If this keeps being delayed, even the cultural festival live you were supposed to have might disappear."

"Guitar and Loneliness and the Blue Planet is already a little different from the one in my memories. I could endure that, but now... now, That Band doesn't exist anymore..."

Shiko vigorously wiped her face with her sleeve.

"I don't know this band..."

Chapter 28: A New Stage, New Tears, and New Songs

After saying those final words, she stopped caring about Hitori and ran straight back backstage. She locked the door and didn't respond no matter how much the others knocked.

The next day, Shiko came out. She explained nothing to the others, only apologized before returning to her usual routine. Hunting, doing housework, sometimes helping with the cooking—it was as if nothing had happened.

But everyone noticed that Shiko had been speaking much less lately. She still worked hard while hunting, and Marina still saw her going out at night. But during the remaining time, she shut herself backstage and watched live recordings over and over. Of course, she had liked watching them before, too, but now almost all her free time was spent backstage, and she rarely did anything with the others.

"Wu-san completely has no expression lately..." Kita lamented.

"Neither do I."

"You're different from Ryo-senpai." Kita said, "And she's also been appearing in front of us less often." She carefully considered her words. "Even when she's with us, I feel like her attitude toward us is different from before—not cold! But... just different. I can't explain it well."

"Little Shiko must be bottling something up!" Nijika turned to Hitori. "Little Bocchi, do you have any information?"

Hitori weighed things in her heart for a long time. Under everyone's gaze, she finally raised her head.

"I-I do know a little..."

Another day was coming to an end. After Shiko finished eating, she washed the dishes with Marina.

"Shiko." Araki called to her from the doorway. She gave Marina a meaningful glance, and Marina immediately understood. After drying her hands, she pushed Shiko's shoulders from behind.

"Miss Marina?" Shiko asked, somewhat surprised.

Marina and Araki said nothing, mysteriously leading her to the bedroom.

No. This was a stage now.

Shiko saw the four members of the band already standing onstage. When they saw the three of them enter, Nijika raised a hand and introduced herself energetically. "Nice to meet you! We're Kessoku Band!"

"Please listen to Guitar and Loneliness and the Blue Planet!"

The familiar intro began to play.

A live?

Shiko didn't quite process it. She turned around, but the two people behind her were already focused on enjoying the performance. She had no choice but to turn back. Everyone onstage was performing seriously, as if the audience below were packed with people. As she listened, she straightened her back and widened her eyes. This wasn't the version they had performed at the audition. This was—

This was the version she knew from her previous life!

She looked at Ryo in shock. Ryo noticed her gaze and gave her a cool wink.

Shiko listened intently. Memories of Kessoku Band welled up in her mind, memories from both her previous life and this one. Before she knew it, tears were streaming from her eyes.

This time, everyone performed even better than they had before.

When the song ended, Shiko wanted to applaud, but Hitori stepped down hard on a pedal and interrupted her.

A furious guitar sound erupted, shaking Shiko's soul. This was the solo Shiko had seen at Kessoku Band's first live in her previous life!

Shiko was held in place by the guitar. There was only her voice in her mind—the guitar solo of Hitori Goto, belonging to Kessoku Band.

Kita took the microphone and held it out toward Shiko.

"That Band. Do you know it?"

Shiko understood what she meant. She wiped away her tears, stepped onto the stage, took the microphone, and faced the two audience members below.

Other than the awards stage in her previous life, this was the first time she had ever stood on a stage.

But at this moment, she felt no fear.

The intro was about to end. Relying on muscle memory, Shiko began to sing.

"あのバンドの歌がわたしには"

"甲高く响く笑い声に闻こえる"

"わたしが放つ音以外"

It ended. The guitar brought the song to a close.

Applause from the audience rang out at just the right moment.

"Ha... ha..." Shiko lowered the microphone.