"Princess Tsunade, you're actually broke, aren't you?" Uchiha Mai shouted.
Tsunade's deliberately carefree back paused slightly, and her calm expression froze. Damn it, how did this brat know?
"Brat, before you say something like that, you'd better think carefully about who I am."
Tsunade abruptly turned around, planted her left hand on her hip, pointed at herself with her right thumb, and declared grandly, "Standing before you is the granddaughter of the God of Shinobi and the sole heir to the Senju clan.
The disciple of the Third, Konoha's strongest taijutsu ninja, the finest medical ninja in the Ninja World, and the leader of the Sannin—Princess Tsunade!
If I wanted money, I could simply take on a few missions and treat a few wealthy merchants. How could I possibly be short of money?"
"Stop pretending!"
Uchiha Mai sneered. He walked over and circled Tsunade twice, observing her as he criticized her. "At the gambling table just now, no matter how terrible your hole cards were or how bad your position was, you always chose to stay in the pot.
Even when you got hole cards that were somewhat playable, you never tried to read anyone else's hand. You just kept calling all the way to the end.
That proves not only that you're terrible at gambling, but that you're also heavily addicted to it—so addicted that you won't leave the casino until you've lost all your money, and so addicted that even after losing everything, you still borrow money to keep gambling.
A degenerate gambler like you must have borrowed every loan shark's money available, leaving yourself buried in debt.
On top of that, the clothes you're wearing have obvious grease stains that look like they were left there four or five days ago. There's still eye gunk in your eyes, and your hair is rather messy.
That proves you don't pay much attention to hygiene. Put simply, you're a lazy mutt.
If a woman doesn't even care about her own appearance, one can imagine just how lazy she's become. A lazy mutt like you would never go to work until you were completely desperate.
Besides, the only place in the Ninja World where you can take on missions is the Underground Exchange. I believe that, in order to collect their debts, your creditors must have stationed people near every exchange.
The moment they discover your whereabouts, they'll force you to keep taking missions to earn money and repay your debts. That must be the last thing you want."
In the original storyline, there had indeed been a scene where Tsunade was pursued by debt collectors. Uchiha Mai had merely inferred the process from the result and added a few of his own judgments and wild guesses.
This was where the classic BGM, "There Is Only One Truth," should have played.
"You little brat..."
Tsunade gritted her teeth and forced out those words. Her pretty face flushed red, then pale, as she clenched her fist and wanted to hammer Uchiha Mai.
She was flustered. She was totally flustered.jpg
"I guessed right, didn't I?"
Uchiha Mai chuckled. "All things considered, returning to Konoha now is the best choice for you, Princess Tsunade.
In Konoha, at least you won't have to worry about food or drink. If your creditors chase you to Konoha, I believe the Hokage will cover for you and help you escape safely.
Once you earn some money and your gambling addiction acts up again, you can invite me to play Texas Hold'em. If you lose your money to me, then at least one of us will be happy."
"You're quite the talker, brat."
Tsunade's face was as cold as frost as she said angrily, "One of us will be happy? You have quite a lot of confidence in your gambling skills."
"Not particularly.
It's hard to say when it comes to games based purely on luck. But if we're playing Texas Hold'em, perhaps the only person in Konoha who can beat me is Lord Nara Shikaku." Uchiha Mai offered modestly.
By this time, Nara Shikaku had already become a Jonin. He was famous throughout Konoha for his strategic brilliance and held great prestige among the Jonin.
Texas Hold'em was a gambling game that tested one's ability to calculate. Surely Nara Shikaku would be able to pick it up with ease.
"Then how about this!
I'll lend you 100,000 yen. Whether you win or lose, it'll count as my money. If you can win ten million at this casino within ten days, I'll return to Konoha with you."
Tsunade propped up her chin with one hand and came up with an idea.
"In your dreams. Whether I win or lose, it counts as your money? Even if I win ten million, it'll all end up benefiting you. You wouldn't do anything and would simply pick up ten million for free.
"At most, we split it thirty-seventy. And my starting stake can't be less than 500,000." Uchiha Mai haggled.
Once, there had been a man who turned twenty yuan into thirty-seven million, defending the dignity of a gambling hero.
Then there had been another man who turned 200,000 yuan into five million, officially earning the title of gambling monster.
Uchiha Mai considered himself fairly skilled at Texas Hold'em, but turning 100,000 yen into ten million in ten days was still a little too difficult.
"Why do I only get seventy percent?" Tsunade pouted, deeply dissatisfied with the portion she would receive. She had no objections to the 500,000 starting stake, though.
"Seventy percent is mine. The remaining thirty percent is yours."
"Then wouldn't I be reduced to begging on my knees?"
Uchiha Mai slapped his thigh and retorted, "If you put it that way, then I can't agree.
Thirty percent of ten million is still three million. You won't have to do anything for ten days, yet you'll get three million for free. Tell me, where else can you get that much money?
I might as well quit being a ninja and go beg right now. I'll volunteer for overtime, all year round, with no days off."
"But I'm still putting up 500,000 in principal. What happens if you lose, brat?" Tsunade continued haggling.
"If we lose, we split it thirty-seventy too. I'm an Uchiha, after all, and I also follow Master Minato. Earning 300,000 would be easy."
Uchiha Mai patted his chest and kept misleading her. Gambling with someone else's money was called hedging one's risk.
"Emmmm..."
Tsunade folded her arms and pondered for a moment. This brat was extremely sly. He had also sounded very convincing at the gambling table earlier. Maybe he really had some skill.
"Fine." Tsunade nodded.
"Hand over the 500,000. I'm going to gamble all night." Uchiha Mai held out his hand.
Tsunade pulled a wallet that still held a trace of warmth from between her two peaks. After opening it, she pinched the bottom of the wallet and poured out all the money. When she counted it, she found that only a little over 7,000 yen remained.
Uchiha Mai: "..."
So after all that discussion, you didn't have any principal at all. But that was fine. He had anticipated this situation long ago!
"Do you have anything valuable that you could use as collateral with Master Minato? You can borrow 500,000 from him," Uchiha Mai reminded her.
Tsunade's eyes lit up. Right!
Master Minato, who had been watching the two of them whisper and mutter from the side, suddenly felt a blow land on his knee. Wait, after you two discussed this for so long, why am I the one who has to pay?
"Little Minato~"
Tsunade put on a kind expression, removed her blue-and-white outer garment, and handed it to Master Minato. Then she began spouting nonsense. "This outer garment was worn by Great-Granduncle back in the day. It holds great sentimental value for me.
Haven't you always dreamed of becoming Hokage? Today, I'll pawn this outer garment worn by Great-Granduncle to you and borrow 500,000 yen. You wouldn't refuse, would you?"
"How could I?" Master Minato said with a forced smile. He took the outer garment and, his heart aching, pulled out his wallet. He counted the bills one by one until he had reached 500,000, then reluctantly handed the money to Tsunade.
He said painfully, "Princess Tsunade, you have to pay me back. This is money Kushina gave me to buy something for her."
Master Minato was simply that warmhearted a man.
"You don't trust me?" Tsunade punched Master Minato in the chest. Then, with saliva on her finger, she counted the bills before dragging Uchiha Mai back to the casino.
"Come on, let's win until the casino's overflowing."
The next morning, Tsunade was trembling all over. She gripped Uchiha Mai by the throat with both hands and roared, "I'm going to strangle you!
Didn't you say you were really good? You lost more than 200,000 in one night! You're not much better than me, brat."
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