The mournful cries of the shattered Primordial Chaos intertwined with the furious roars of the Witch-Demon War, forming a symphony of destruction that seemed to have finally crossed some critical threshold.
Within Purple Firmament Palace, the Heavenly Dao core, which had completely fallen into dead silence as though it had given up on itself, suddenly lit up with one last ray of unwilling, hysterical light!
It could not give up! The Primordial Chaos had been created by Pangu, bound by laws, and was the foundation of its existence! Even if its agent was a hopeless salted fish, it had to make one final struggle!
[Forced execution: Consciousness Override Protocol! Highest authority override!] [Target: Agent Xiao Kuang!] [Objective: Assume control of the body! Intervene in the Witch-Demon War!]
An utterly irresistible will, cold and vast beyond measure like a galaxy pouring down from the nine heavens, instantly shattered Xiao Kuang's lazy, empty mental defenses and forcibly took control of his body!
"Hm?!" Xiao Kuang's body, which had been lounging with its legs up while watching the show, abruptly sat upright. The frivolous salted-fish expression vanished from his face, replaced by an utterly indifferent, supreme, icy expression that seemed to contain the flow of countless laws. There was no trace of human emotion in his eyes, only the pure radiance of the Heavenly Dao.
"This shell... is lazy to this extent..." Heavenly Dao Xiao Kuang, as it would temporarily be called, lowered its gaze at its outfit: an undershirt, baggy shorts, and flip-flops. Its brows twitched almost imperceptibly, clearly finding it extremely unsuitable. It tried to use its power to conjure Dao Ancestor robes, only to discover that the body's instincts seemed to resist such a "serious" change. In the end, it could only make the clothes slightly more proper, though the style remained indescribable.
There was no time to fuss over such trivial details.
Heavenly Dao Xiao Kuang took one step, ignoring space and time as he directly appeared in the heart of the Witch-Demon battlefield, within the most violent region of the energy storm!
At that moment, Gong Gong was roaring as he drew upon the power of the Primordial Chaos's water veins, transforming them into billions of ferocious water dragons hundreds of millions of feet long. He was about to have a final clash with the Grand Formation of the Stars controlled by Di Jun and Taiyi! The collision of destructive energies was imminent!
"Stop."
A calm, cold voice devoid of all emotion, yet seemingly containing the ultimate principles of heaven and earth and the laws of all things, clearly resounded within the deepest souls of every Witch and Demon locked in frenzied battle!
The voice was not loud, yet it was like a stabilizing needle in the sea, like an edict from the nine heavens, carrying an authority that could not be defied!
The booming collisions of divine abilities, exploding stars, and battle cries... actually froze for an instant at that single word!
Every bloodthirsty Witch and Demon felt their souls tremble involuntarily. Their movements slowed by half a beat as they looked toward the source of the voice in bewilderment.
At some point, a figure had appeared in the center of the battlefield.
His attire was strange—barely passable Daoist robes paired with flip-flops—and his hair was a mess. Yet a terrifying pressure filled the air around him, making their primordial spirits shudder as if they were facing the entire Primordial Chaos itself! The cold radiance in his eyes made them afraid to look directly at him!
"D-Dao Ancestor?" Di Jun cried out in shock, holding the River Diagram and Luo Script. His tone was filled with uncertainty. This aura was undoubtedly that of the Heavenly Dao, but this appearance...
"That bastard who got struck by lightning?!" Gong Gong recognized the face as well, but it felt completely different. The previous grinning, carefree expression had become icy indifference, making him even more wary.
Heavenly Dao Xiao Kuang swept his gaze across the fragmented earth, the wailing living beings, and the tangled, boiling karmic resentment and baleful aura that had nearly taken tangible form. His cold thought rang out again, carrying the weight of judgment:
"The conflict between the Witches and Demons has brought disaster upon the Primordial Chaos. Your karma towers to the heavens. You shall..."
It was about to announce punishment and forcibly separate the two sides when it suddenly felt the body's mouth wanting to yawn uncontrollably. An intense lazy thought—This is so troublesome. Can't this just end already?—began trying to erode its absolute rationality like a virus.
[Body instinct interference: ...suggestion... let them settle it with rock-paper-scissors... best two out of three... saves time and effort...] Heavenly Dao Will: [!!!Rejected! Be serious!]
It forcibly suppressed that damned salted-fish instinct and continued coldly, "...suffer heavenly punishment! Cease fighting at once and return to your respective places, otherwise..."
Before it could finish, Gong Gong, that reckless brute, though intimidated by the Heavenly Dao's aura, relied on the strength of his Ancestral Witch body and his bloodshot fury to crane his neck and roar, "Pah! The Heavenly Dao is unfair! It favors the Demon Race! If you want to fight, then fight! Why all the nonsense?! Take this punch!"
As he spoke, he actually threw another punch, carrying the force of countless waters!
Normally, a single thought from the Heavenly Dao could reduce him to ashes.
But at that moment, the Heavenly Dao was controlling this body, and the body's original owner had only one subconscious response to attacks—take them head-on!
Thus, under the dumbfounded gazes of countless Witches and Demons, that cold and imposing "Dao Ancestor," when facing Gong Gong's punch that could shatter stars, actually... neither dodged nor defended. He did not even use a defensive spell, merely standing there stiffly as if saying, "Come on, hit me here."
Bang!!! Gong Gong's solid punch struck Heavenly Dao Xiao Kuang squarely in the chest.
Energy burst outward, yet the Daoist robes—barely qualified as such—were completely unharmed. Heavenly Dao Xiao Kuang's body did not even sway. Instead, Gong Gong's arm went numb from the rebound, and he staggered backward with a dazed expression.
The Heavenly Dao Will was stunned as well, then flew into a rage—if it could even be said to rage: [This body's instinctive response?! Why didn't it counterattack?! Why didn't it defend?! It just took it head-on?!]
It felt that the impact of its grand entrance had been greatly diminished by that bizarre act of taking the punch head-on, even seeming a little... cheapened?
What drove it even more insane was that after taking the punch, the body's mouth began to uncontrollably mutter, "Not bad strength. Didn't you eat?"
[Body instinct interference: ...evaluating the attack's strength... attempting to provoke...] Heavenly Dao Will: [Shut up! (Forcibly silenced)]
Heavenly Dao Xiao Kuang's expression turned even colder, yet beneath that icy façade seemed to lurk a nearly imperceptible trace of... frustration and collapse?
It stopped wasting words, afraid that the body might do something even more shocking, and directly invoked its highest authority!
Buzz—!
The invisible laws of the Heavenly Dao became the toughest of chains, instantly wrapping around every member of the Witch and Demon races! Whether Ancestral Witches or Demon Emperors, regardless of their strength, all of them were forcibly frozen in place! The power they had gathered was pressed back into their bodies, and the divine abilities they had unleashed were forcibly dispersed into nothingness!
The world-destroying battlefield seemed to have had its pause button pressed.
Only those cold Heavenly Dao eyes swept over all living beings.
"The Witch and Demon races have violated the heavenly laws and brought disaster upon the Primordial Chaos. Their punishment shall be—" Heavenly Dao Xiao Kuang was about to announce a lengthy confinement or a reduction in their fortune when that salted-fish instinct returned yet again!
[Body instinct interference: ...confinement is too troublesome... need to provide meals... calculating reduced fortune is even more troublesome... suggestion... labor reform... for example... cleaning the Purple Firmament Palace backyard zoo for ten thousand years...] Heavenly Dao Will: [...(struggling violently)]
In the end, amid the fierce struggle between the Heavenly Dao Will and the salted-fish instinct, the punishment that came out became, "—you shall... remain confined within your respective territories for three thousand years! During this period... you must reflect upon your mistakes every day and write... eight-thousand-word letters of repentance! And... regularly submit ideological reports to Purple Firmament Palace!"
Letters of repentance? Eight thousand words? Ideological reports? Every frozen Witch and Demon's mind crashed. What kind of new heavenly punishment was this?!
The Heavenly Dao Will itself nearly went "pfft." It did not understand at all how it had uttered such a punishment! This was absolutely not the Heavenly Dao's style! It was all this damned body's fault!
It forcibly steadied its mentality, which was on the verge of breaking down, and added coldly at last, trying to restore its dignity, "If you offend again... it will not be as simple as letters of repentance!"
Having said that, it gave the Witches and Demons no time to react. Heavenly Dao Xiao Kuang—or rather, the Heavenly Dao—instantly vanished from the spot as though fleeing a plague-ridden scene and returned to Purple Firmament Palace.
The moment it returned to Purple Firmament Palace, the Heavenly Dao's will withdrew from Xiao Kuang's body as though utterly exhausted.
Xiao Kuang's own consciousness returned. He shook his head, looking baffled. "Hm? Was I sleepwalking just now? It felt like I had a nightmare about grading homework? Terrifying, terrifying..."
He slumped back into the massage chair and continued watching the "livestream," only to discover that the Witch-Demon battlefield seemed to have stopped? Both sides were just standing there in a daze?
"Huh? Is it over? Who won? Did Gong Gong win with a headbutt?" He stretched out his neck curiously.
On the battlefield of the Primordial Chaos, the Witch and Demon races, freed from their frozen state, stared at one another. Recalling that Dao Ancestor with his bizarre style and even more bizarre punishment, the life-and-death killing intent between them actually dissipated by more than half.
What replaced it was an overwhelming sense of absurdity and... a trace of confusion.
They had fought to the death, only to be punished with letters of repentance? Was there something wrong with this tribulation?
Di Jun and Taiyi's faces were ashen, not because they were injured, but because they felt humiliated and stifled. The Twelve Ancestral Witches also looked at one another. Gong Gong even subconsciously rubbed his fist, recalling the sensation of that strike. The low-ranking Witches and Demons had begun whispering among themselves. "How do you write a letter of repentance?" "Eight thousand words? Our Witch race doesn't know enough characters to scrape together eight hundred!" "What's an ideological report?"
The first Witch-Demon War thus temporarily came to an end in a way no one had expected—an utterly bizarre conclusion brought about by the Heavenly Dao's near breakdown while taking over the fight, along with the indirect interference of salted-fish instincts.
Though heaven and earth remained covered in devastation, at least... they had stopped fighting for now, right? Probably.
The progress of the Primordial Chaos's tribulation seemed to have once again been invisibly led astray by that salted fish, toward an entirely new and unprecedented direction.
Heavenly Dao Will, entering hibernation once more: Zzz... (its code twitched intermittently, as though it had been left with severe aftereffects)...
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