Konoha: This Psycho Is a Bit Uchiha
Chapter 34

The Izakaya

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"Originally, we were supposed to head to Tanzaku Town next... Honestly, Lady Tsunade, gambling during the day was one thing, but now you have to drink here at night too..."

"And we haven't gone back in such a long time..."

Shizune sat beside Tsunade, constantly tapping her index fingers together while her mouth never stopped moving.

Inside the bustling izakaya, Tsunade kept pouring alcohol down her throat.

Before long, Uchiha Sen's group of three walked in through the entrance.

"Haha, Haku, I told you my nose was sharp. On this whole street, only this place's smell could draw me in, yet you insisted it was coming from next door."

Sen swaggered into the shop, followed by Zabuza and Haku.

"Yes, Lord Sen. Our mission still isn't complete. We've already spent the entire day having fun, so tomorrow we should head for the border of the Land of Iron."

Haku bowed respectfully and whispered softly into Uchiha Sen's ear.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. It's not easy getting a chance to come out and have fun, so we can talk about that stuff later. If it really comes down to it, Zoro can finish the mission by himself while we go somewhere else and keep playing!"

Sen waved his hand dismissively.

Zabuza's face turned green, as though ten thousand alpacas were galloping through his heart.

"Huh!"

Uchiha Sen craned his neck as if he had spotted something, then walked down the corridor toward Tsunade Senju.

"Hahaha, we meet again, pretty miss!"

Uchiha Sen greeted her enthusiastically with a wave, pulled out a chair, and dropped into it without the slightest bit of restraint.

Tsunade glanced at the flustered Zabuza and Haku behind Uchiha Sen, frowned, and said:

"Find an empty seat and sit down. Do you need me to invite the two of you personally?"

Tsunade did not dislike Uchiha Sen. After all, the little fellow had helped her win hundreds of thousands of ryo in the past two days, and everything Sen said was always pleasing to hear.

"Yes."

The two nodded, then pulled out chairs and sat down.

Sen leaned close to Haku's ear and asked in what he thought was a very quiet voice:

"Hey, Haku, since we're sitting at her table, does that mean this pretty miss will pay when the bill comes?"

Zabuza froze...

Please, young master... Even if you're going to say that... could you at least lower your voice? Covering your mouth with your hand doesn't make it soundproof...

Zabuza cautiously looked across the table. Sure enough, two or three black lines had appeared on Tsunade Senju's face...

"Um... Lady Tsunade Senju... We... Lord Sen is just like this..."

While carefully apologizing aloud, he grumbled inwardly...

If she flips the table later, we should be able to beat them, right...

"Forget it. Kid, eat as much as you want. I'm treating you to this meal today!"

Tsunade said no more. It was only one meal, after all. The money she had won over the past two days could pay for countless meals.

Much later.

"Lady Tsunade... You really can't drink any more..."

Shizune grabbed Tsunade Senju, trying to stop her from stuffing another bottle into her mouth.

"Leave me alone!"

"Hahaha, that's right! Let's get wild!"

Uchiha Sen stood on the stool with his hands on his hips, laughing loudly.

"Oh no, Lord Sen, you've had too much to drink..."

Haku held Uchiha Sen's wrist at the side, his face full of concern.

Zabuza held his forehead, feeling as though he had placed his trust in the wrong people...

They had only drunk one bottle of sake in total...

What kind of gods were these two, one big and one small...

"Haku, I'll sing you a song. Pretty sister, come on, let me liven things up for everyone!"

"Elephant, elephant, why is your nose so long~ Mama said~ a long nose..."

[Too awful to watch, too awful to watch!]

At that moment, an old man and a young boy arrived at the entrance of the shop on the street corner.

"Man, we've searched for so long and still haven't found a single clue. I'm starving."

Naruto clasped his hands behind his head and complained toward the sky.

Jiraiya seemed drawn in by the noisy atmosphere inside the shop as well.

Hmm, this place is so lively. Maybe there'll be some girls dressed really sexily inside~

"Then let's eat here first~"

"Huh? Isn't this an izakaya?"

Naruto stared in surprise at the three large characters posted at the entrance.

"Haven't I told you many times? I'm still a kid!"

Jiraiya looked at him with disdain.

"So what? A brat just needs to eat some bar snacks."

The two bickered all the way into the izakaya.

"Welcome~"

Naruto was dissatisfied, and his mouth kept chattering away.

"Seriously, we didn't have to eat here. We could've found a ramen shop or something..."

Jiraiya looked down at Naruto and felt that they were simply incompatible, though he still explained:

"This is where information gathers."

As he spoke, he turned his head and happened to spot half of Uchiha Sen's body sticking out as he swayed on top of a table, along with Tsunade Senju clapping and cheering, and a completely bewildered Shizune...

"Tsunade!"

"Big Brother Sen!"

"Jiraiya?"

"Hey, Double-Zero Two? Naruto?"

The drunkenness on Tsunade's face faded by seventy or eighty percent. She braced both hands on the table, stood up, and asked:

"Why are you here?"

Jiraiya smiled as he walked over to the table, his gaze sweeping across the three people opposite Tsunade...

Zabuza Momochi... Haku of the Yuki Clan, and Uchiha Sen...

Naruto ran over first, thrilled to see Uchiha Sen.

"Wow, Big Brother Sen, why are you here..."

"Hahaha, that's a long story. But I remember you were with those two guys, weren't you? Why are you out with a little old man? Also, this guy is really ugly."

Uchiha Sen looked at Jiraiya with obvious disgust. Hearing that, Tsunade looked as though she could barely hold back her laughter.

"Hahaha, ignore that old man. He really is kind of ugly."

Naruto grinned. It was clear that seeing Uchiha Sen made him very happy. He turned to Tsunade, scratched his head, and asked:

"But is this sister really that old?"

Bang!

Before the words had even finished leaving his mouth, a fist the size of a sandbag landed on his head.

"Ow~ It hurts, it hurts!"

Naruto jumped around in pain.

"Why did you hit me?!"

"That is your punishment for speaking disrespectfully!"

Tsunade raised her fist and glared fiercely at Naruto.

"What an annoying brat."

Shizune was obviously much calmer, though she could not shake the feeling that something major had happened...

She had actually encountered the other two of the Legendary Sannin in a single day...

With three groups seated across two rows of seats, the space was rather crowded. But with Uchiha Sen there, Naruto did not feel quite as awkward, and he kept stuffing food into his mouth.

"I've missed you guys so much. Big Brother Sen, you have no idea. Ever since my house got demolished, I haven't had anywhere to live. Some things happened in the Hidden Leaf Village too... Sigh... If only you had been in the village..."

Perhaps thinking of the Third Hokage's death, Naruto became dejected and sighed repeatedly.

"Hm?"

Haku and Zabuza both caught the deeper meaning in Naruto's words and frowned.

What had happened in the Hidden Leaf Village? And why had his house been demolished?

Haku knew more about this matter. The events he had experienced with Sen during the day remained vivid in his mind. At the time, Lord Sen had said Orochimaru was lying... and he had actually been right!!

At the time, Haku had thought Uchiha Sen merely wanted to extort some money. He had never expected Uchiha Sen to have seen through everything...

Looking again at the unkempt man beside him, Haku's eyes were full of admiration...

What kind of person was he, really...

On the other side, Jiraiya and Tsunade Senju had shared a few drinks. Tsunade lowered her head, seemingly remembering her encounter with Orochimaru during the day, and said:

"Come to think of it, today really is a day for old friends to meet..."

Jiraiya picked up the bottle and filled Tsunade's cup, then raised his own and drained it in one go. From Tsunade's words, he immediately understood that Orochimaru had most likely met Tsunade already. The collapsed wall he had discovered during the day had probably been caused by that guy.

"Orochimaru, huh..."

"What happened?"

Shizune's expression changed slightly. Jiraiya's precise guess shocked her. She looked toward Tsunade, and after the two exchanged glances, Tsunade said:

"It's nothing that can't be discussed."

"That guy's hands seem to be seriously injured, but Uchiha Sen said I couldn't heal them. I'm curious who could turn that proud bastard into a stray dog."

Taking out a deck of cards from her clothes, Tsunade shuffled them while muttering. Clearly, the technique Orochimaru had mentioned during the day, one that could bring the dead back to life, had tempted her...

Jiraiya glanced at Uchiha Sen, who was chatting and laughing with Naruto beside him, and his pupils narrowed slightly. Before leaving the village, he had heard some information about that fellow.

The general assessment was: do not provoke that insane Uchiha. His strength was unfathomable. Some said he could use Wood Release, while others said he possessed the Mangekyo Sharingan. In any case, he was incredibly strange.

"His hands were most likely done by the old man..."

Jiraiya's expression darkened as he spoke. He handed the remaining plate of grilled skewers to Naruto beside him, his eyes fixed on Tsunade Senju.

"The old man?"

Tsunade felt as though her brain could barely keep up. From Orochimaru's words during the day, he should not have gone to the Leaf Village yet. But Jiraiya seemed to be saying that the two had already fought?

Jiraiya nodded and continued:

"Orochimaru attacked the Hidden Leaf Village and used the Impure World Reincarnation to summon the First and Second... The old man died in battle trying to stop them."

Naruto lowered his head sadly. Tsunade Senju paused in the middle of shuffling the cards.

Just as I thought...

I knew something bad had happened.

Perhaps she was used to it, or perhaps her feelings for the Leaf Village were no longer as deep as they had been when she was younger. A moment later, Tsunade had returned to normal.

She handed Jiraiya the cards she liked. Though she did not say a word during the process, she had already understood the purpose of their trip.

Jiraiya placed a card face-down and said with a solemn expression:

"Tsunade, the village wants you to succeed the Hokage."

Shizune froze.

Naruto's eyes widened.

Even Zabuza Momochi was utterly shocked...

Only Haku seemed unconcerned, using a handkerchief to wipe the grease from Uchiha Sen's mouth.

Naruto first looked at Tsunade, then Jiraiya, and finally Uchiha Sen.

Hokage?

Why are they suddenly talking about that?

What exactly is going on?

Wasn't Big Brother Sen on pretty good terms with the Third? Why doesn't he seem surprised at all to hear that the Third died in battle...

Naruto had misunderstood Uchiha Sen on that point...

In Sen's eyes, there was only Double-Zero Seven, not any Third Hokage... He did not even know who the Third Hokage was...

"Mm-hmm, this place's grilled chicken skewers are really good..."

Naruto could not take it anymore.

"Big Brother Sen, didn't you hear? The Third Hokage died in battle..."

Sen clearly still had not understood. His innocent, bewildered expression seemed to say: The Third Hokage died in battle, but I didn't do it?

"Mm-hmm, got it. There's one grilled chicken skewer left. Do you want it?"

"Hehe, I knew you were already full. Then I'll gladly take it."

Naruto was stunned senseless... An inexplicable rage rose within him, and he shouted:

"I mean the Third Hokage who found you a place to live! Big Brother Sen, I never thought you were this kind of person!"

Only then did Uchiha Sen understand who Naruto meant by the Third Hokage.

"Double-Zero Seven?"

Naruto nodded.

Sen slowly stood up, the savage expression on his face revealing the fury in his heart.

"Who did it? That uncle who sells snake meat?"

Naruto nodded again.

Those damn primitive natives! They actually dared lay a hand on this planet's great warrior!

Although Double-Zero Seven was weak, old, ugly, and corrupted by the natives, he was still someone from the same place as me, no matter what.

[Ding! A massive emotional fluctuation has been detected in the host. The Mangekyō Sharingan is activating.]

Black chakra seeped out through his skin. When he looked at Sen again, his eyes had already turned scarlet.

"This is bad! Naruto, get out of here!"

"Shizune, run!"

The group quickly fled the scene. The two of them understood something about Uchiha Sen's current condition.

"This is bad. The last time Lord Sen fell into this state, it was only after the Third Hokage talked him down that he recovered..."

Haku turned back, worry written across his face as he looked toward the shop.

[Ding! Headquarters calling Hole-Hole Monster! Headquarters calling Hole-Hole Monster!]

[Our division has recently recalled Double-Zero Seven to the planet. From this point onward, Hole-Hole Monster will independently carry out the plan to invade this land. As the planet's greatest warrior, is Hole-Hole Monster prepared?!]

Inside the shop, Uchiha Sen instantly regained his clarity. He stood ramrod straight, saluted, and shouted:

"Please rest assured, Headquarters! Hole-Hole Monster is ready at all times!"

[Phew... That was close... If this happens a few more times, these eyes might go blind...]

A few more minutes passed, and the shop fell silent. Jiraiya lifted the curtain and peered inside. Seeing Uchiha Sen sitting in his seat, eating the grilled chicken skewers that had just been served, he turned to the others and said:

"Looks like it's nothing serious. That kid's in there eating."

"Come to think of it, can't that kid control his own strength?"

Jiraiya said this with lingering fear.

However, Tsunade Senju saw things differently. She had personally witnessed him using the Mangekyō Sharingan freely during the day.

[Hehe, that was clearly all thanks to this system, okay?!]

"Oh? You're all back. Ah, Double-Zero Two, you're spouting nonsense again. I just received a message from Headquarters—Double-Zero Seven didn't die in battle. He was recalled by Headquarters. He's probably happily enjoying himself somewhere on the planet right now."

Watching Uchiha Sen eagerly ramble nonsense, Naruto felt both heartbroken and helpless.

Brother Sen's condition must have worsened because of the Third Hokage's death...

End of Chapter
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