Dead silence.
The clearing at the village entrance, bustling just moments before, was now so quiet that even a pin dropping could have been heard.
A massive stone pot, half a person tall, stood abruptly on the yellow earth. The mountain-and-river patterns on its walls gave off a faint, eerie glow. With every flicker, the surrounding air seemed to tremble.
An oppressive aura from the primordial wilderness left every adult present struggling to breathe.
"This... what is this?"
An aged yet powerful voice broke the stillness.
The crowd parted on its own, and a hale, gray-haired elder hurried over with a walking stick.
It was Shi Yunfeng, the chief of Stone Village. After staring at the stone pot for a while, his wrinkled face filled with disbelief, and even the hand gripping his walking stick trembled slightly.
"Chief, this thing suddenly just... grew!"
Ermeng's father, Shi Linhu, swallowed and pointed at the stone pot, his voice dry. "It was hanging from Skinny Monkey's ear just now. Little One shouted, and it turned into this!"
"What?"
Shi Yunfeng whipped his head around, his hawklike gaze locking onto Shi Hou, who stood dazed nearby, before shifting to Shi Hao, who was circling the stone pot.
He hurried up to the pot, extended his withered palm, and carefully pressed it against the wall.
Hum!
The stone pot trembled, and a gentle yet vast surge of vital essence instantly pushed Shi Yunfeng's hand away.
"The aura of the Great Dao... this is a primordial treasure imbued with the aura of the Great Dao!"
Shi Yunfeng sucked in a cold breath, an unprecedented brilliance erupting in his clouded old eyes. "Heaven has blessed our Stone Village! Our ancestors have manifested and bestowed a mighty treasure to protect our people!"
Whoosh-!
The young and middle-aged men around him erupted in excitement.
What did a treasure bearing the aura of the Great Dao mean in the Great Wilderness? It meant killing a few more Primordial Remnants. It meant a much greater chance of the village surviving a beast tide!
"Quick! Bring the three sacrificial animals and prepare the ceremony!" Shi Linhu was so excited that his face and neck flushed red.
"Everyone move aside! Don't let the children damage the treasure!"
The men immediately surrounded the stone pot so tightly that not even water could pass through, their eyes as feverish as though they were looking at a peerless beauty.
Shi Hou, shoved to the outskirts: "..."
As he watched this unfold, ten thousand alpacas stampeded through his mind.
Ancestors manifesting, my ass!
That's my cooking pot! Mine!
And haven't you noticed that this thing looks an awful lot like a wok? What kind of mighty primordial treasure looks like a big iron cooking pot?!
"Um... Grandpa Chief."
Shi Hou timidly raised his hand, trying to squeeze between the fanatical men. "Could you give my pot back? I still need to cook."
The air went quiet again for a second.
Everyone turned to look at him with an expression that said, "Has this kid gone stupid?"
"Skinny Monkey! Stop fooling around!"
Shi Hou's father, Shi Shoushan, emerged from the crowd with a dark expression, raising a hand to flick his son's forehead. "This is a mighty treasure of our clan! What's all this nonsense about cooking? Go play somewhere else!"
"Exactly. You don't know squat, Skinny Monkey." Ermeng sniffled nearby, gloating. "A treasure this powerful has to be for smashing vicious beasts to death. How could it be for cooking meat?"
Shi Hou covered his forehead, absolutely seething with frustration.
Just then, Shi Hao, who had been leaning against the pot and drooling all this time, suddenly looked back and called out in his childish voice, "Skinny Monkey is right!"
Everyone froze.
Shi Hao stood on tiptoe, clutching the rim with both little hands and peering into the pitch-black pot. Sniffing, he said, "There's a yummy smell inside. It's for putting tasty food in!"
Hearing Little One speak, Shi Yunfeng immediately changed his tone and asked gently, "Hao, you can sense it?"
"Mm-hmm!"
Shi Hao nodded vigorously and pointed at the stone pot. "It told me it's hungry."
The corner of Shi Hou's mouth twitched.
Damn this lousy system and its double standards!
I'm the host! Why does it only talk to Shi Hao like some lovesick bootlicker?
"Hungry?" Shi Yunfeng knitted his brows, his expression grave. "Could a mighty treasure like this require an offering of blood essence to activate? What are we to do...?"
Seeing the chief's imagination heading toward something as horrifying as a "blood sacrifice," Shi Hou could no longer hold back.
If I don't explain now, this pot will end up gathering dust in the ancestral shrine!
"Chief! It really is just a cooking pot!"
Shi Hou took a deep breath and charged forward. Before anyone could react, he grabbed one of the stone pot's handles.
"Skinny Monkey, what are you doing?!" Shi Shoushan cried, his face draining of color.
But in the next instant, everyone shut their mouths.
As Shi Hou's hand touched the pot, its ancient, heavy gray stone body suddenly erupted with dazzling red light.
Boom!
Without warning, a crimson flame surged beneath the pot.
It was no ordinary fire, but a flame woven from countless tiny runes. The instant it appeared, the surrounding air warped from the heat, and a terrifying wave of scorching temperature swept across the clearing.
"Back off! Get back!"
Shi Linhu roared, grabbed two children, and swiftly retreated.
Shi Yunfeng's expression changed drastically as well. His walking stick glimmered as he desperately shielded the villagers behind him.
Yet Shi Hou, standing at the center of the flames, remained completely unharmed.
In his mind, that cold mechanical voice rang out again, only this time with a rhythm that seemed eager to get started.
[Host detected in position.] [Ingredient detected: leftover tier-one vicious beast meat, "One-Horned Pig" (three meters to the host's left).] [Sole diner "Shi Hao" detected to be hungry.] ["Stew Anything" cooking mode activated!] [Vitality cost: 10] [Current track: "Two Tigers." Difficulty: one star. BPM: 100.] [Today's cooking: 0/1]
Huh?
Before Shi Hou could react, a bizarre interface suddenly appeared across his vision.
Just like the rhythm-game interfaces he had played with in his previous life, four transparent lanes descended from above, round notes falling rapidly along them. Their endpoint was the... stone knife in his hand?
Wait!
I haven't agreed to this yet!
Shi Hou felt a mysterious force connect to his body, and his face instantly turned pale.
His left hand extended uncontrollably. As though performing a magic trick, he drew a piece of raw meat off a nearby chopping board through the air, slapping it down on the edge of the enlarged stone pot.
The miniature stone knife in his right hand swelled in the wind, becoming a huge cleaver gleaming with a chilling edge, held tightly in his grip.
"Dun! Dun-dun! Dun-dun-dun!"
The cheerful nursery-rhyme intro, audible only to Shi Hou, blasted through his brain.
It was... the melody of "Two Tigers"!
"Skinny Monkey? What are you doing?"
Shi Hao's eyes widened as he watched Shi Hou suddenly assume a strange opening stance, his gaze brimming with curiosity.
Shi Hou stood with his legs spread in a horse stance, his right hand holding the cleaver above his head and his left pinning down the pork. His entire body was as stiff as a marionette, yet his face bore the tragic resolve of a man marching to his death.
"I... I'm losing control of myself!"
Shi Hou forced the words through gritted teeth.
The next second, the first note in his vision slammed into the judgment line.
It was the nursery rhyme's first accented beat!
Shi Hou's right hand moved.
"Swish!"
An afterimage flashed past, accompanied by an involuntary shout overflowing with over-the-top bravado:
"This is... the God of Cooking's ultimate secret!"
Before you continue