(A beautiful picture of Zhu Zhuqing)
Tang San hurried over and plopped down on the chair, grimacing in pain.
"Divine doctor! Quick, take a look at me! How can this be treated?!"
Mr. Zhi reached out a hand with dirt-caked fingernails and placed it on Tang San's wrist.
He closed his eyes and stroked his beard, looking profoundly mysterious.
"Hmm..."
After a long while, Mr. Zhi knitted his brows, his expression grave.
"Young friend, yours are no ordinary mortal hemorrhoids!"
"Your pulse feels as though it has plunged into an ice cave. Cold poison has seeped into your bones, like ten thousand ants devouring your heart, like a fiend clinging to your body.
These hemorrhoids have developed a spirit of their own and seem intent on turning against you. If you delay any longer, I fear your life may be in danger!"
"These are the hemorrhoids seen but once in a thousand years-the Extreme Yin Soul-Devouring Hemorrhoids!"
Tang San seized Mr. Zhi's hand in excitement, tears nearly spilling from his eyes.
"Incredible, divine doctor!"
Tang San asked eagerly, "Since you can tell what it is, can you treat it?!"
Mr. Zhi sighed and shook his head:
"Alas, this yin poison has sunk too deep. Evil Qi has entered your body and invaded your eight extraordinary meridians. Had you come three days later, I fear not even the Sea God descending to earth could have saved you. Even I cannot cure it completely, but..."
He changed tack. "I have a secret family remedy here. Once used, it can temporarily suppress this yin poison for a month. Wait a moment, and I'll fetch your medicine."
Tang San laughed wildly to himself. Hahahaha, excellent! One dose suppresses it for a month, so I'll buy a year's supply first. Then what worry would I have about my hemorrhoids not getting better?! Perfect!
Mr. Zhi shakily took out a bottle of pills and set it on the table.
The little bottle of pills happened to be hidden behind the durian on the table.
Mr. Zhi made a gesture. "Young friend, take the medicine. That will be one hundred Gold Soul Coins."
Tang San felt the pinch.
One hundred Gold Soul Coins? That much?
After all his years of smithing, that was about all he had managed to save.
But to treat his hemorrhoids, he gritted his teeth and paid up!
Then he followed Mr. Zhi's gesture and saw the durian on the table.
Tang San's expression instantly turned serious.
Mr. Zhi leisurely stroked his beard, his tone calm.
"This medicine is simple to use. Just put it directly in your chrysanthemum."
Tang San's expression froze, and his hands began to tremble uncontrollably.
"D-doctor, are you serious?!"
He reached out a trembling finger and pointed at the durian on the table, his voice going shrill.
"That thing, inside?!"
Mr. Zhi still looked profoundly mysterious as he leisurely stroked his beard.
"I have practiced medicine for decades and treated countless patients. Rest assured, young friend, although this medicine is a little potent, and putting it in may cause some slight pain..."
Tang San stared fixedly at the durian.
One hard spike after another seemed to gleam coldly in the dim light, as if mocking him in silence.
Mr. Zhi continued, "Moreover, this medicine does smell a little, but it is unquestionably a fine remedy rarely seen in a hundred years! It is absolutely worth the price! Put it in, and I guarantee you a month without worries!"
Tang San looked at the durian, his face alternating between green and white as beads of sweat the size of beans seeped from his forehead.
He gritted his teeth and stamped his foot.
"All right! Good medicine tastes bitter but cures the sick; strong medicine in the ass makes walking a blast! I'm doing it!"
He pulled out a bag of Gold Soul Coins and slapped it onto the table with a smack.
"Keep the change!"
Then he scooped up the durian and ran outside, sniffling as tears swirled in his eyes.
His departing figure was as tragic and valiant as a warrior marching off to battle.
Night fell, and Xiao Jue lay alone in the villa, tossing and turning, unable to sleep.
"So bored..."
He sprang out of bed with a kip-up and decided to go wander the streets.
After all, what if he could trigger the system to recover fragments?
He left the courtyard, and Shrek's dormitory area lay not far away.
In the moonlight, a graceful figure emerged from the girls' dormitory.
Xiao Jue took a closer look, and his eyes nearly popped out of his head.
It was Xiao Wu!
She wore a nurse outfit: a white nurse's cap, a white nurse's uniform, a short skirt below that, and white fishnet stockings beneath it.
Her long, slender legs were on full display in the moonlight. The fishnets hugged the tops of her thighs, and that tantalizing glimpse of absolute territory was simply first-rate!
Xiao Jue swallowed, inwardly ranting, Wh-what's going on? Why is Xiao Wu dressed like that?
Xiao Wu hurried outside the dormitory, found Dai Mubai and Oscar chatting, and went up to exchange a few words with them.
Dai Mubai and Oscar exchanged a glance and made a helpless gesture, but still turned and led Xiao Wu toward Tang San and Oscar's dormitory.
Xiao Jue silently followed them from a distance, burning with curiosity.
At that moment, Xiao Wu was having a frantic inner monologue:
Little San didn't get better even after eating Oscar's sausage today.
There's no other choice. I'll have to use my first Dress-Up System unlock to unlock the nurse outfit!
A pink system panel that only she could see floated before her-
[Dress-Up System: check in to unlock outfits!] [Wear this system's outfits to unlock their corresponding abilities!] [Each outfit must be used on the day it is unlocked, or the check-in streak will be broken!]
Oscar and Dai Mubai walked ahead, muttering quietly:
"Xiao Wu is so beautiful. I really don't know what she sees in that brat Tang San."
Dai Mubai spread his hands, walked up to the dormitory door, and shoved it open.
"Tang San, Xiao Wu came to see you..."
Before he could finish, Dai Mubai's voice cut off abruptly.
Xiao Wu: "Third Brother, you... Ah!!!"
Dai Mubai, Oscar, and Xiao Wu all cried out at once.
Xiao Wu even covered her eyes, her cheeks turning scarlet in an instant.
There was Tang San, his butt sticking out and facing that big, coldly gleaming durian...
Four people stared at one another, eight eyes meeting, and the air fell silent for several seconds.
Time seemed to freeze.
Xiao Wu was the first to break the silence, her voice going shrill:
"Tang San! I never thought you were this kind of person! You actually, actually... like that kind of spiky thing! Shameless!"
Oscar's eyes widened, his face full of shock. "Holy shit, Boss Dai, my new roommate is way too perverted!"
Tang San hurriedly scrambled up from the floor, fumbling to pull up his pants, his face flushed crimson.
"Xiao Wu, it's not what you think! I'm treating an illness!"
Xiao Wu trembled all over with anger, pointing at Tang San as she berated him:
"Treating an illness? What illness needs you to take off your pants and face that thing to treat it??? Liar!!!"
She covered her eyes and turned to run, tears still clinging to the corners of her eyes.
Tang San reached out, wanting her to stay. "No!!!"
Oscar and Dai Mubai exchanged a glance. Unable to hold back any longer, they burst out laughing.
Oscar laughed so hard he couldn't straighten up. "Bro, at least make your lie believable!
Dai Mubai clutched his stomach as he laughed, then patted Oscar on the shoulder. "Little Oscar, looks like you'll have to be careful."
Oscar instantly realized something. His smile vanished, and his face went deathly pale.
"Damn, Boss Dai, can I switch dorms with you?"