The Man Called Giyu Tomioka

Today was another perfectly ordinary day for Kiyohiko.

That was, if he didn't count Shinobu Kocho drawing his blood that morning with an extremely thick needle.

Seriously, Kiyohiko even suspected the syringe was meant for elephants. She'd drawn so much blood in one go that she'd nearly left him with kidney deficiency.

Now, as Kiyohiko ate lunch, his cheeks were gaunt and his complexion was pale, as though his body had been hollowed out.

The table in front of Kiyohiko was piled high with a mountain of food, along with a large bowl of duck blood and vermicelli soup. Aoi Kanzaki had only agreed to learn how to make it for him after he'd spent quite some time complaining to her about Shinobu Kocho's atrocities earlier that day.

Although Kiyohiko could now curb his desire to eat people by eating food, ordinary food really did taste like wax to him.

Kiyohiko picked up a piece of radish stewed until it was soft and tender. It felt like he was staring at a piece of moldy wood, but he mechanically put it in his mouth anyway.

"Mm... this radish really... tastes like radish."

He mumbled his assessment, but his gaze began wandering restlessly around the table.

Aoi Kanzaki sat across from him, frowning as she quickly shoveled down her food while also dividing her attention to look after the three little ones. Seeing how fierce yet energetic she looked, Kiyohiko felt an inexplicable surge of pride.

After the time they'd spent together, his Bond Value with Aoi Kanzaki was just one step away from the next level.

Just a few days ago, the girl had still been stuck in the mire of her own inferiority complex. After some "education in love" from yours truly, though it had mostly consisted of bickering, her eyes were noticeably brighter now.

But it feels like my guidance still isn't enough. If I remember right, Sunflower Seed and Muichiro joined in the same class, didn't they? Maybe I should get him to come over. But with my current status, it's hard for me to leave the Butterfly Mansion grounds.

Kiyohiko slurped down several big mouthfuls of vermicelli and felt a little more alive.

Forget it, I'll deal with it when the time comes. But... Aoi Kanzaki's canon pairing is with Inosuke, right? If that boar-headed boy finds out I gave his future wife such in-depth psychological counseling, shouldn't he give me his boar mask as thanks?

Kiyohiko's gaze moved to the right, where Kanao Tsuyuri sat as quietly as an exquisite porcelain doll. She ate her food in small bites, her movements mechanical yet pleasing to watch.

Though she might not answer even once for every ten things he said to her lately, the Bond Value rising at a snail's pace had to prove he was doing at least some good, right?

Tanjiro, you iron-headed kid, this is the future Flower Hashira. I've been helping liven things up and making sure people notice her. When that kid gets here, he'd better treat me to a good meal.

Kiyohiko made his calculations in his head, feeling that he was practically the Demon Slayer world's "gold-medal matchmaker."

Gradually, his gaze settled on Shinobu Kocho, who was seated at the head of the table.

She ate slowly and gracefully, lifting a thin slice of pickled ginger with her chopsticks and placing it between her pale pink lips. Her cheeks moved slightly as she chewed.

On further thought, Kiyohiko realized that the people in the Butterfly Mansion all seemed to have some degree of mental illness, especially this bad woman.

Come to think of it... who was Shinobu Kocho's canon pairing again?

It was as if a virus had suddenly been implanted in Kiyohiko's brain, making him frantically search through the memories of his previous life.

Oh, right. It's that poker-faced Water Hashira who wears a haori with a tortoiseshell pattern on one half all day, looking like he's saying "I'm not hated" when everyone actually hates him-Giyu Tomioka.

Crack.

A crisp, discordant snap abruptly cut through the harmonious sounds of chewing and clinking bowls and chopsticks in the dining room.

The wooden chopsticks in Kiyohiko's hand had snapped in two at the middle without warning.

Kiyohiko didn't know what had happened either.

In his previous life, he had liked quite a few videos shipping Shinobu Kocho and Giyu. After all, the videos were well made, the man was handsome and the woman beautiful, and there was plenty to ship, especially the famous Ansai waist drum scene. That made him a fan of the pairing too.

But just now, when Kiyohiko recalled all of that, a nameless anger had welled up in his heart, and an indescribable irritation filled his mind.

What's going on? Why do I get so irritated whenever I think of that poker face?

The dining room, which had been fairly lively, fell silent.

Aoi Kanzaki stopped shoveling down her food, her chopsticks still between her teeth as she stared at him in shock. The three little ones huddled together in fright. Kanao didn't look up, but the hand she was using to pick up food stopped in midair.

As for Shinobu Kocho, she slowly set down her bowl. Her purple eyes narrowed slightly, carrying an inscrutable smile as she stared at Kiyohiko, her gaze like a scalpel.

"Oh my, Mr. Kiyohiko? Is today's food not to your liking? Or..."

Her voice was soft, the final note rising slightly with a hint of dangerous sweetness.

"Did you remember something that really upset you? Those chopsticks are quite sturdy, you know. How much force would it take to crush one to pieces?"

Only then did Kiyohiko come back to his senses. Looking at the chopsticks in his hand, now reduced to scrap wood, he felt an inexplicable pang of guilt, though he had no idea why he should feel guilty.

"Ah... well... actually..."

He hurriedly tossed the broken chopsticks onto the table, trying to cover it up with his signature nonsensical smile, but the muscles around his mouth were too stiff to cooperate.

"Actually, I wanted to test the quality of these chopsticks! That's right! These chopsticks... well, they clearly don't pass. Too brittle. One-star review!"

The atmosphere in the dining room grew even stranger after Kiyohiko's feeble excuse. Aoi Kanzaki eyed the two broken pieces suspiciously, then looked at Kiyohiko's face, which had "I'm lying" written all over it. Finally, she gave a loud huff and turned to the kitchen to fetch new utensils.

Once Kiyohiko had his new chopsticks, he began frantically stuffing food into his mouth to cover up his embarrassment.

"Mm... Miss Aoi's cooking... really is... hic... delicious."

He mumbled indistinctly, his eyes seemingly sweeping casually over Shinobu's calm face.

"Speaking of which, Miss Shinobu, as a Hashira, you must often have meetings or go on missions with the other Hashira, right? I heard... um... that Water Hashira, the guy named Giyu Tomioka, is pretty impressive?"

He tried to make his tone sound as natural as if he were discussing the weather, even putting on a show of frowning as though he were struggling to remember the name.

"But I've heard the wounded here at the Butterfly Mansion say in private that he's pretty antisocial, always wearing a dead-fish expression. He seems hard to get along with. It must be exhausting working with him, Miss Shinobu, right? A man that taciturn probably can't even express himself clearly, let alone find anything in common with anyone."

Shinobu Kocho gently placed the slice of pickled ginger between her lips and chewed it slowly. She didn't answer immediately. Instead, she rested her cheek on one hand and watched Kiyohiko with those smiling, deep-purple eyes.