You Really Made Me Laugh

"Wu Clan brute, shove your crap! Who... who said we didn't prepare gifts!"

Unable to bear it any longer, Ci Tie pointed at Ju Mang and started cursing him out.

His temper had always been exceptionally explosive. After being berated for so long, he had long since reached his limit!

Though he truly had not prepared a gift, they were all renowned figures. Who did not have a bit of stockpiled treasure on hand?

Ju Mang picked his nose. "If you prepared one, then take it out. If you don't take it out, how am I supposed to know whether you really prepared it?"

Ci Tie pointed the Wolf-Tooth Mace in his hand at Ju Mang and demanded indignantly, "What if I take it out?"

Ju Mang put on an utterly unconcerned look. "Then take it out. What the hell does that have to do with me? It's not for me anyway!"

Ru Shou continued fanning the flames from the side. "Exactly, exactly. What else do you want? Want him to call you Dad? Why don't you just dream yourself a snot bubble?"

Ci Tie's teeth itched with hatred after hearing that.

I may look like a cow, but do you really think I'm stupid?

Not only do I have to give a gift, I also have to become your son? Am I crazy, sick, or suffering from mad cow disease?

Seeing Ci Tie at a disadvantage, Nine Infants, also a Demon God, could no longer stand by.

In a sinister tone, he said unhurriedly, "Fellow Daoist Fu Xi, it's not that I want to say this..."

"Then don't say it!"

Nine Infants had barely gotten halfway through when Liu Mang interrupted him.

Liu Mang had heard plenty of this sort of bullshit in his previous life.

Whenever someone started like that, they were definitely holding back no good fart.

"It's not that I'm being nosy" meant they were about to spout nonsense;

"Let me say something fair" meant they were getting ready to take sides;

"Not gonna lie" meant they were about to say a bunch of things they should not say!

The best way to deal with such people was to shut them up before they could speak.

Liu Mang's words stunned Nine Infants. He had clearly not expected that opening. Did people not usually wait for the other party to continue?

Why was he not playing by the rules?

Nine Infants, who had nine faces, obviously would not give up because of one sentence from Liu Mang.

Pretending to be regretful, he let out a long sigh, his voice full of pity. "Alas, what a shame. Fellow Daoist Nu Wa really has terrible judgment."

As Nine Infants spoke, he glanced up at Liu Mang, his eyes full of contempt, as though he were looking at a pile of shit. "Not just anyone is qualified to become an adopted son."

Upon hearing Nine Infants's words, the other Demon Gods' eyes lit up as well.

Gui Che, who likewise had nine heads, was the first to speak. "Demon God Nine Infants speaks reasonably. Otherwise, if certain shameless people slipped into our Demon Race, would that not tarnish the Demon Race's reputation?"

Shang Yang paused while playing with the Green Jade Hairpin, nodding as he said, "That is only proper. If Fellow Daoist Nu Wa wishes to take an adopted son, I believe His Majesty's ten Princes would be the best candidates!"

As someone who had always cared deeply for the Demon Race, he naturally understood the impact Nu Wa attaining the Dao would have on the Demon Race. He hoped even more that the Demon Race could remain closely united.

If Nu Wa acknowledged Di Jun's son as her adopted son, naturally no one would continue to think of dividing the Demon Race.

The more Shang Yang considered it, the more he felt it was a perfect solution for everyone. His gaze at Fu Xi was filled with anticipation.

"I ask Fellow Daoist Fu Xi to speak with Fellow Daoist Nu Wa about this!"

"I think Fellow Daoist Nu Wa should settle this matter before considering attaining the Dao, lest our Demon Race"

The Demon Gods began discussing it one after another. Not one of their words mentioned Liu Mang, yet every word was about Liu Mang.

They were clearly cursing a bald donkey while pointing at a monk.

Liu Mang nearly laughed from anger. I don't go looking for trouble, and they actually think I'm easy to bully? How can I tolerate this!

"Hahaha! Do you even hear the crap you're saying? An old granny crawling into bed—you really made me laugh!"

Di Jiang's eyes lit up when he saw Liu Mang speak, and he assumed the posture of a humble student.

"Here it comes! Here it comes! He's opening his mouth! This is the move!"

"I can't see how he struck, only that he stood beneath the sunlight, standing on the moral high ground!"

Liu Mang pointed at Nine Infants and asked, "You said my mother has poor judgment? Then do you also think she took the wrong path to attaining the Dao?"

"What the hell are you? Do you have any right to discuss a Saint? Hanging a gourd in your house and you really think you're some lord?"

After speaking, Liu Mang did not even spare Nine Infants another glance. He turned to Gui Che instead. "So you mean that my mother, a Saint about to attain the Dao, needs to discuss taking an adopted son with you? She needs your approval?"

"I..."

"What do you mean, 'I'? You farting out of your belly button? How the hell are you making noise, huh?"

Without waiting for Gui Che to answer, Liu Mang turned to the last person who had spoken, Ying Zhao. "As for you, you so obviously don't want my mother to attain the Dao. Do you think my mother cannot attain the Dao, or have you already prepared to pull some trick when she does?"

With several enormous accusations dropped upon them, Nine Infants and Gui Che were rendered speechless.

Fu Xi immediately unfurled the Bagua Diagram, staring at Ying Zhao with vigilance. "Ying Zhao, you had better explain yourself clearly. Otherwise, do not blame me for disregarding our kinship and spilling both your blood right here."

Faced with Fu Xi's questioning, Ying Zhao nearly cried. He had only just arrived and had only said one sentence. What preparations could he possibly have made?

Yet Fu Xi's attitude made it obvious that he did not believe him!

"I'm sorry, I was wrong! I fully support Fellow Daoist Nu Wa taking Liu Mang as her adopted son. This is my congratulatory gift."

After speaking, in order to show his sincerity, Ying Zhao respectfully offered Fu Xi a piece of Spiritual Material he had treasured for a thousand years.

Only after checking it for a long while and finding no issue did Fu Xi slowly put away the Bagua Diagram. Yet he still watched Ying Zhao with a wary expression, as though ready to attack at any moment.

Ying Zhao was so aggrieved that he nearly cried. Raising his hand, he gave himself a hard slap that swelled his face, all while muttering, "It's all because of this rotten mouth of yours. Why did you have to respond to Nine Infants?"

The others swept by Liu Mang's gaze also hurriedly took out all kinds of Spiritual Treasures, Spiritual Plants, and Spiritual Fruits, afraid that if Liu Mang was dissatisfied, even more vicious words would come out of his mouth.

Watching the treasures pile up in front of Liu Mang, Di Jiang's face was full of shock. "Terrifying indeed! I've learned it! I've learned it!"

"Big Brother, what are you muttering about?" Hou Tu, standing beside Di Jiang, asked curiously.

"Little sister, I think we absolutely must maintain a good relationship with Liu Mang!" Di Jiang said solemnly as he looked at Hou Tu. "Otherwise, the treasures our clansmen worked so hard to gather may not even be enough for him to plunder in one go!"

Hou Tu thought about Di Jiang's words, then thought about Liu Mang's performance. Her face was likewise filled with lingering fear as she repeatedly nodded at Di Jiang.

No one among the Demon Race dared bring up Nu Wa taking an adopted son again. Instead, they lined up one by one to give Liu Mang gifts. Even Di Jun and Tai Yi were no exception.

Soon, it was the last person's turn: Demon God Fei Lian. Fei Lian approached Liu Mang with a hesitant, awkward gait.

"I... I don't have any Spiritual Treasures!" Fei Lian said cautiously.

"Spiritual Materials are fine too! I'm not picky~" Liu Mang said with a smile.

"I don't have those either!"

"Spiritual Plants are fine too~" After Liu Mang spoke, Fei Lian shook his head.

"Spiritual Fruits?" Fei Lian still shook his head.

"Then what do you have? Don't tell me you have a heart that loves me?"

"Huh? Is that okay?"

"Okay my ass! If you don't have anything, go borrow some!"

"Can I borrow from you? You seem to have plenty!"