Lu Xunji gave Xie Ji a look of exasperation and reached out to pinch his cheeks. "Idiot."
"Ow, ow, ow..." Xie Ji let out a string of miserable cries, tears springing to his eyes as though it really hurt.
Lu Xunji quickly let go, rubbing the cheek he had pinched red as he withdrew his hand. "Did it really hurt that much?"
"Then let me pinch you so you can see for yourself." Xie Ji ground his teeth.
Lu Xunji obligingly bent down and brought his beautiful face right in front of Xie Ji. "Go on, then."
Xie Ji: "..."
I've seen people picking up rubbish and picking up money, but this is my first time seeing someone asking for a beating.
"What's wrong with you?" Xie Ji poked Lu Xunji's face. "Move away."
Lu Xunji straightened up. "Acting spoiled again."
Xie Ji rolled his eyes, not planning to spend any more time with this inexplicable man. Neither of his two successive probes had elicited anything from Lu Xunji that suggested he remembered the dream.
He probably wouldn't remember what had happened in the dream. After all, forgetting a dream completely upon waking was hardly unusual.
Xie Ji felt inexplicably stifled, as though someone had taken liberties with him only to develop amnesia the next day, leaving him alone, unable to either dwell on it or let it go.
He stood at the entrance and shook his head, trying to shake every sensation from that dream out of his mind.
Before long, a staff member came to tell him that someone was looking for him outside.
Xie Ji went out to look. Sure enough, it was the man in the blue headscarf from yesterday.
Blue Headscarf was leading three cows, his expression very dark.
To get these three cows from the production team, he had paid five thousand yuan apiece!
Although spending that money had hurt a little, Xie Ji's question yesterday-"Is your child really your child?"-had weighed on his heart like a heavy stone, leaving him unable to breathe.
He and his wife had been married for three years and had always had a very good relationship. After their child was born, the financial pressure on the family had increased, leaving him less time to spend with his wife, and they often argued. He spent most of his time going from one production crew to another, hoping to secure a good future for his newborn child.
Xie Ji stood smiling at the entrance. Blue Headscarf handed him the ropes leading the cows. "What exactly did you mean by what you said yesterday? Did my wife cheat on me?"
Xie Ji gathered up the ropes and leisurely led the cows into the cowshed.
Blue Headscarf quickly grew anxious. "Didn't you say the Cow God only tells one fortune a day? It hasn't told me who that adulterer is today, so why have you shut it in the shed? You..."
"Don't worry. I already asked the Cow God for you on the way over." Xie Ji spoke with complete composure. "Your wife hasn't cheated."
Blue Headscarf froze. "Then what exactly did you mean by what you said yesterday?"
Xie Ji waved a hand. "Nothing. I was just asking."
"Just... asking?" Blue Headscarf's eyes widened. "So my child is my child!? There was no cheating and no lover?!"
Xie Ji spread his hands. "That's right."
Blue Headscarf swayed on the spot, seemingly unable to stay on his feet.
He was rather confused at that moment, unsure whether to feel relieved that his entire night of worry had been unnecessary or furious that this pretty young boy had actually played him for a fool!
He soon came to his senses and snapped, "You dared to mess with me?"
"I didn't." Xie Ji remained perfectly composed. "I only suggested you ask. I never said your child wasn't your child."
"That cow can't really talk either?"
"Thank you, Brother Blue, for generously opening your wallet and giving us the cows. A cow is a cow. How could it talk? My friend, animals aren't allowed to become spirits after the founding of the nation." Xie Ji looked at the camera and said gently, "Folks, we should embrace science and reject feudal superstition."
"That's bullshit! I clearly heard it with my own ears yesterday!!" Blue Headscarf charged forward, wanting to grab Xie Ji and take him back to the cowshed to check, but Xie Ji smoothly stepped back twice, leaving him grabbing at empty air.
"My friend, you must have misheard because you suspected your wife of cheating." After saying this, Xie Ji addressed the camera again. "Folks, don't follow his example. You need to trust your partner one hundred percent, or you'll fall into a bad person's trap just like this gentleman."
As he spoke, he stepped forward and patted Blue Headscarf on the shoulder. "I only wanted to let you experience how treacherous society can be. Just consider that fifteen thousand your tuition fee. I'll forgive you for being so naive this time, but don't do it again. After all, there aren't many people as nice as me left in this world."
Blue Headscarf: "..."
They clenched.
His fists clenched.
Lu Xunji was still building a wall in the courtyard when he suddenly heard a furious roar.
"You damned swindler! Get over here! I promise I won't beat you to death!"
Then came Xie Ji's voice. "Good benefactor, calm down! We're all from the same village. Don't be so hotheaded!"
Blue Headscarf chased after Xie Ji, who was running like the wind. "Who the fuck is from the same village as you?! Stop right there!!!"
As he ran, Xie Ji shouted, "You and me, heart to heart, living in the same global village!"
"Fuck off! Stop right there and give me my money back!!"
"Why should I?! I worked hard to scam you out of it! I put in the labor too!"
"You! You're infuriating! I'm going to beat you to death today!!"
"Director! Director, someone's committing murder! Are you going to do anything?! A murder on this show wouldn't do you any good either, would it?!"
The director's voice came through his earpiece. "The production team does not control NPCs' personal emotions or rage meters. Contestants are advised to look out for themselves."
With noodle-like streams of tears running down his face, Xie Ji sprinted through the wind, Blue Headscarf close on his heels.
Lu Xunji: "..."
What kind of upright, fully automatic troublemaking machine is this?
"No. No more running. I can't run anymore." Xie Ji stopped, panting, and held out a hand as he looked at Blue Headscarf, saying solemnly, "Stop chasing me. I'll fight back. I really will fight back!"
Seeing Xie Ji's delicate appearance, Blue Headscarf gave a vicious snort and walked over to grab his collar.
Lu Xunji's expression darkened, and he strode over. He had barely sounded the first syllable of "Let him go" when he saw Xie Ji pull a long black whip out of his pocket!
Blue Headscarf froze too.
"?"
Why was this guy carrying such a long whip around?!
But when he took a closer look, it wasn't a whip at all. It was clearly a pitch-black snake!
Judging by the shape of its head, it was venomous too.
Blue Headscarf jumped in fright, but Xie Ji didn't release the snake to bite him. Instead, he held it by the head... and lashed him three times with it.
Lu Xunji: "..."
Blue Headscarf: "!!!"
The director and the livestream audience: "???"
Little Black: "Bro! Bro, I can bite him! I really can bite him!! QAQ!"