Crazy, Crazy, Crazy! The Fake Young Master Bullies All the Wealthy Families with Absurdity

[Both virgins, 1v1, an utterly absurd fake young master bottom vs. a seemingly aloof but truly scheming top who's one trigger away from a psychotic break]

Xie Ji wakes up to find himself the cannon-fodder fake young master in a novel about an irresistible heartthrob.

To make him a foil for the universally adored real young master, his parents pack him off to a farming reality show.

The real young master is aloof and beautiful, but he's destined to become a plaything in the hands of the other young masters.

Xie Ji's mission is to grind affection points with this aloof beauty and protect him from those scumbags.

Xie Ji: "..."

Tears soak my pork trotter rice. I'm a beast of burden, so I'll work till I drop.

And so, to complete his mission, Xie Ji begins bullying every wealthy young master without discrimination.

When a young master reaches for food, I spin the lazy Susan. When a young master opens the door, I hop into the car.

When a young master sings karaoke, I skip his song. When a young master drinks water, I slam on the brakes.

Xie Ji confidently plants his hands on his hips. But before he can even feel proud of himself, the young masters start throwing punches at the dinner table over who gets to put food on his plate.

Xie Ji: "Huh? ...This isn't right, guys."

Not only does he fail his mission and max out all the young masters' affection meters, but the aloof beauty turns the tables and shuts him away in a little villa.

The real young master: "Come here. Kiss me."

Xie Ji: "...?"

Bro, what's with this overwhelming 'I'm your master' energy?

Xie Ji is stunned. I treat you like a brother, and you treat me like a dog?

Unyielding and proud, Xie Ji declares, "I refuse!"

So the real young master lowers his noble head. "Do you want to control me? I'll be your dog. Sweetheart, give me a kiss."

Xie Ji: "?"

The real young master leans down. "Mwah."

Xie Ji: "!!! Mwah, my ass!"

Seriously, eight hundred kisses a day? Bro, have you got magnets installed in your lips?