No Joke, My Underwear Really Ripped

At the bar, Hughes stood firm, refusing to yield to the bad old man's oppressive might even in the face of death. The two argued back and forth for quite a while.

"That's your medical bill, not mine. You have to pay for treatment. It's only natural!"

"Huh? I couldn't scrape together that much money even if I sold the guild."

"Bastard, how could Fairy Tail not be worth 20 million J?! No, wait, the guild is our home. How could you even think of that?!" Furious, Makarov enlarged his fist and brought it down on Hughes's head.

"I haven't even asked you for the money to rebuild the guild, and you had a hand in destroying it."

Hughes, who had activated Tekkai to take the blow, said it was weaker than a mosquito biting his scalp. He patted his tanned chest, then turned his empty pockets out for Makarov to see.

"Look at me. Do I look like someone who can pay it back? My underwear is stuck in my crack, and I still can't bear to replace it!

"Is it because I won't replace it? Because I love it so deeply?

"No, it's because I'm broke!"

Perfectly self-assured, Hughes loosened his waistband and looked ready to pull his pants down and show him. Alarmed, Makarov hurriedly jumped down from the bar and tied his waistband back up for him.

"Don't take them off, don't take them off! Fine, I'll cover the bill for now. You can pay me back little by little! No interest. I won't charge you interest."

Makarov had been startled by Hughes's move. He really was someone with something wrong in his head, ready to strip whenever he felt like it. Even Makarov could barely keep up with his train of thought.

Behind them, Natsu and the others, who had been messing around moments earlier, suddenly called a truce and turned to look. "Huh? Master, why are you putting your hands on Hughes's lower belly?"

"Oh, I'm going to show the master my underwear..." Hughes answered, turning his head as he struggled to pry Makarov's hands off his waistband.

He had always answered whenever anyone asked him something like that.

"Eww~ Master!!"

"Makarov, I, Macao, never dreamed you were that kind of man."

"Pah! I'm going to tell Laxus right now!"

Makarov: ...I'm tired. Let it all be destroyed!

Makarov's hands trembled as he let go of Hughes's waistband. He stood rooted to the spot, looking utterly dejected, like a helpless old man who had suffered a terrible blow and couldn't accept reality.

Knowing the big mouths in this guild, Makarov knew it would take only a few days for several versions of the story to spread all over Magnolia.

His reputation for the rest of his life was ruined.

He had let Porly... No, no, he and Porlyusica weren't involved like that. He had let Laxus down.

Mira, standing beside Makarov, was deeply disappointed. She had overestimated him. He couldn't even handle a little matter like this.

Shaking her head, she pulled Hughes's medical bill from Makarov's hand and stuffed it into Hughes's.

Hughes's eyes widened. "Hey, Mira, I was this close to getting out of paying!"

"Hughes, we should pay what we owe!" With that, Mira opened the small package in her hands, revealing twenty vials neatly arranged inside.

"You don't want to pass out every time you overuse your flames, do you?"

"From now on, drink this before you use your flame ability, and you won't have an attack."

Hughes was actually quite afraid of his illness. He examined the medicine for a good while, then let out a long sigh. "It's good stuff, but this is 20 million J we're talking about! Paying off that much debt won't be easy!"

At Cang City Psychiatric Hospital, where he had been, quite a few patients had gone mad and been sent there because they couldn't handle debts like mortgages and car loans.

Mira's eyes lit up slightly. It's good that it won't be easy! She secretly shot the stunned Makarov a look and spoke softly. "It's all right. I can help you pay it back. Once you turn thirteen, you can take on job requests at the guild.

"I checked. Even the lowest D-Class requests pay 30,000 J. If we pay it back together, we can clear it very quickly."

"Yes, yes, Mira's right. With your strength, Hughes, you can easily complete those A-Class requests. You should know that completing a single A-Class job pays at least several hundred thousand J.

"If you pass the exam and become an S-Class Mage in the guild, you'd only need to complete a few S-Class requests to pay off the 20 million J!"

After catching Mira's look, Makarov coughed a few times and spoke only of the results, not the process. With his hands behind his back, he waved them at Mira. He had done his best.

If the jobs on the request sheets were that easy, what would they need mages for? Wouldn't it save employers time and effort to just find some people at random?

Their little exchange hadn't escaped Hughes's notice. He eyed them suspiciously, then reached out and took the small package from Mira. It was better to keep the medicine on him.

"You two aren't setting a trap for me, are you?"

"I am one of the Ten Wizard Saints. Do you take me for that kind of man?" Makarov said firmly.

I'd sooner believe Qin Shi Huang than you two! Hughes thought scornfully. He tossed the bill into the small package containing the medicine and held his now-free hand out to Makarov.

"What?" Makarov asked, puzzled.

Hughes kept his hand out, utterly unabashed. "Lend me some money!"

Makarov instantly flew into a rage. "I'm already covering your medical bill, and now you want to borrow money from me?"

"I pulled a little too hard just now, and my underwear ripped. I don't have money to buy a new pair!" To make sure Makarov believed him, Hughes made as if to show him again.

Now rather jumpy at the word "underwear," Makarov slapped his forehead hard with his right hand, feeling helpless. With his left, he handed Hughes a 100,000 J bill.

"It's a gift. You don't have to pay it back. Don't ever use such an embarrassing trick again. I can't afford to lose face like that."

Hughes didn't stand on ceremony at all. He took the bill and stuffed it straight into his pocket.

As long as a trick worked, who cared whether it was embarrassing? Even if he lost face, the whole guild would lose face with him. Otherwise, why had he put the guild mark in the most conspicuous spot?

Mira watched thoughtfully, then copied him and held out her hand.

"Master, could you lend me some money too?"

Makarov: ...Are all kids like this these days?

Mira pointed out the window. It was already dark. "We still haven't found a place to stay, and we don't have enough money. We'll pay you back soon!"

Makarov felt guilty. He had actually lumped Mira in with Hughes just now.

"Mira, you don't need to look for a place outside. The guild has dorms. Lisanna and Elfman have been staying there while you've been away these past few days.

"As long as you join the guild, it will take care of you for free until you turn thirteen. Food and lodging are both free.

"Although you're already thirteen, I can still make an exception and let you stay for free until you learn how to do jobs."

Mira didn't answer. She simply pointed at Hughes. She didn't think Makarov would feel comfortable letting him stay in the guild dorms too.

Hughes, standing nearby, was scratching his butt. When he saw the two of them frowning at him, he thought his scratching was bothering them, so he moved back a few steps before continuing.

His underwear really had snapped just now, and it was rather uncomfortable caught in his crotch.

Mira's small gesture made the wrinkles on Makarov's forehead pile up. He had nearly forgotten that Hughes was ill.

The boy really couldn't stay in the guild dorms. It was too dangerous.

"Mira, are you going to live with Hughes?"

"The four of us will live together." Mira thought it over for a good while. She still had to bring Lisanna and Elfman along; she wouldn't feel at ease leaving them alone in the guild dorms.

"Wait, I want to live alone." Someone's remark was completely outside Makarov's consideration.

Makarov owned quite a few houses in Magnolia, and he went through all his properties in his head.

"I have a house in the suburbs. Never mind, I'll take you there myself. Given Hughes's condition, that's the only place you can stay!"