What's the Point of Fighting for a Cushion? The Real Boss Brings Their Own Sofa!

Inside the Purple Cloud Palace, there exists another universe.

Though it appears to be only a thousand zhang in circumference, it actually contains an infinite void. Chaos Airflow cascades down from the void like a waterfall reaching the heavens. Every inch of space is filled with the Great Dao's pressure, so immense it would suffocate a Grand Luo Golden Immortal.

Above the main hall, a simple, ancient platform floats in mid-air. This is where the Dao Ancestor lectures.

Below the platform, only six cushions, shrouded in purple mist, are arranged.

These are the sacred seats that all beings in the Great Desolation dream of, and the direct ticket to immortality.

At this moment, the most intense and brutal "musical chairs" game in the entire Great Desolation is unfolding here.

The Three Pure Ones, being the Pangu Orthodox Lineage and protected by the Xuanhuang Pagoda, secured the first three seats with little suspense.

Laozi's mind wandered in the void, oblivious to everything around him.

Primordial Heavenly Lord sat upright, his face a mask of entitlement.

Though Sovereign of Heaven was seated, his hand remained on his sword hilt, eyes scanning his surroundings warily.

With her elder brother Fuxi enduring several divine attacks to cover her, Nuwa, dripping with sweat, managed to snatch the fourth seat. She was now panting heavily, her chest heaving.

As for the fifth...

Hongyun, that good-natured soul, somehow stumbled into luck. Relying on his reckless, foolish persistence, he actually plopped himself down. He was now grinning foolishly, completely unaware he had just sat on a powder keg.

Only one seat remained.

An extremely chilling black wind swept past, skimming the ground.

Despite his severe injuries, Kunpeng displayed astonishing speed in this moment of life-or-death. His withered hands, like eagle's talons, had already touched the edge of the cushion.

It seemed he was about to secure it.

Just then, Taiyuan, along with Jieyin and Zhunti, ambled into the middle of the hall.

Seeing the sixth and only remaining seat, Jieyin's already pained face contorted into a shriveled orange peel. A primal instinct to "cry poverty" from the depths of his soul began to awaken.

Zhunti, the third brother, reacted even faster.

His eyes darted, his long-brewed emotions instantly in place. His eyes reddened, his voice beginning to tremble with sobs.

His lips parted, and the classic line that had shocked countless Aeons in the Great Desolation, "Elder Brother, our West is truly suffering," was about to escape.

He would also accompany it with a world-shattering kneel, crashing into the nearby pillar.

With this display of tears and commotion, Hongyun would surely give up his seat, and Kunpeng would be forced out.

This was destiny, and the signature move of the Two Sages of the West – the Art of Shamelessness.

Just as Zhunti's knees were about to bend and the sob was about to escape his throat...

"Hold it back!"

A cold, slightly disdainful voice exploded directly in their minds.

Taiyuan, quick as lightning, grabbed Zhunti by the back of his collar and lifted him like a chick. He also didn't forget to cast a warning glance at Jieyin, his second brother, who was ready to join in the act.

"E-Elder Brother?"

Zhunti was stunned, forcing himself to swallow his tears, nearly choking himself. His face turned beet red.

"Are those cushions even meant for people?"

Taiyuan transmitted his voice, his tone full of disdain. "They're as hard as rocks, and sitting on one is like signing a contract to sell yourself. You'll be doing unpaid labor for Hongjun for ten thousand Aeons with no benefits."

"What are our identities?"

"The only three scholars in the West! Even if we're 'poor' now, we must have integrity! We won't sit on these hard stools, filled with schemes and the stench of copper!"

"Not only will we not sit, but we'll stay far away to avoid catching any bad luck."

Jieyin and Zhunti didn't quite understand what "benefits" or "unpaid labor" meant, but their Elder Brother's words about "schemes" had certainly intimidated them.

After all, along their journey, their Elder Brother's unfathomable depth had already won them over.

"Then... where do we sit?" Jieyin, the second brother, looked around blankly. Apart from the six cushions, the hall was empty, not even a brick in sight.

They couldn't possibly stand to listen to the lecture, could they? That would be too undignified.

Taiyuan smiled mysteriously, not answering. Instead, he led the two of them past the crowded area, all the way to the very back of the hall.

This was a dead corner, and the place everyone disliked the most, because it was farthest from the Dao Ancestor, making it difficult to hear clearly.

But precisely because of this, it was extremely spacious and undisturbed.

"This is it."

Taiyuan nodded in satisfaction, then waved his sleeve.

Swish--

Treasured light overflowed, and auspicious energy streamed forth.

The previously dim corner was instantly illuminated.

Three ostentatiously designed lounge chairs, entirely crafted from Chaos Primordial Stone and inlaid with countless tiny star gems, descended from nowhere.

[Chaos Spirit Jade Carefree Chair]

The chairs not only looked incredibly luxurious but also exuded a Great Dao rhythm that made anyone who saw them want to lie down and never get up.

That wasn't all.

Taiyuan, as if performing magic, produced an Innate Wutong Wood Tea Table and placed it between the three chairs.

Following that, the exquisite Enlightenment Tea set was laid out piece by piece.

Boiling spirit spring water was poured into the pot, and a few leaves shimmering with the light of laws unfurled in the water.

Instantly, a tea aroma, richer and more profound than the one from the earlier picnic, swept through the entire great hall of the Purple Cloud Palace.

The scent even surpassed the Dao rhythm emanating from the purple cushions.

"Come, second brother, third brother, sit."

Taiyuan was the first to recline on the central Leisure Chair.

He instantly sank into the soft backrest. The Chaotic Spirit Jade automatically conformed to the curve of his back, releasing warm energy. Taiyuan couldn't help but let out a soft hum of comfort.

He casually crossed his legs, picked up a cup of tea, and gently blew away the steam.

"This... this..."

Jieyin and Zhunti's eyes widened.

They looked at the six dry grass mats crammed together in front of them, which offered no comfort whatsoever, and then at the luxurious reclining chairs before them, which promised imperial comfort.

Even a fool knew which to choose!

Without a word, the two of them lay down on the chairs, one on each side.

"Oh~ Comfortable~" Zhunti exclaimed, his voice almost a moan. He went completely limp. "Elder Brother was right. Whoever wants to sit on those broken cushions can have them. This is much more comfortable!"

This scene.

Dealt a massive psychological blow to the powerful beings in front who were still arguing fiercely over the cushions.

Especially the Three Pure Ones, who had just settled down.

They had initially felt quite pleased with themselves for securing the prime spots.

But at that moment, they looked back.

They saw the trio from the West lounging comfortably on the shimmering reclining chairs, sipping Enlightenment Tea. And the chairs seemed to rock automatically?

No matter how they looked at it, they, sitting on the ground, seemed like refugees who couldn't afford tickets and were forced to squat in the aisles.

While the three behind them were clearly first-class VIPs.

The cushions beneath their butts suddenly felt prickly and irritating.

Primordial Heavenly Lord, in particular, who prided himself on appearances, turned green at the sight of Taiyuan's setup compared to their own "communal sleeping arrangements."

His mentality had shattered.

Just then.

"Dong--"

A bell chime that struck the soul rang out.

The void above the high platform distorted slightly, and an elder in a gray Daoist robe, with an ancient face that showed no emotional fluctuation, slowly appeared.

Dao Ancestor Hongjun had finally arrived.

The phantom image of the Jade Plate of Creation swirled around him. As his eyes opened and closed, it was as if universes were being born and destroyed. The supreme Saintly aura emanating from him compelled everyone below, except for the three of Taiyuan, to want to prostrate themselves in worship.

Hongjun had intended to follow the predetermined script.

He would first survey the chaotic scramble for Saintly positions below, lament the suffering of all beings, and then logically confer the Saintly titles, perhaps offering some compensation to the two weeping individuals from the West.

The script was perfect.

However.

As his gaze swept across the hall and finally settled on a corner at the very back of the great hall.

Hongjun's poker face, which had remained unchanged for ten thousand years since his enlightenment, as if nothing could faze him even if the heavens collapsed, twitched violently.

Even his state of mind, which was in unison with the Heavenly Dao, developed a slight crack.

In that corner.

Three figures were lounging in chairs in an extremely ungraceful posture known as the "Ge You slump" (a relaxed, slouched pose). They held teacups and were eagerly watching him. Their gazes were not those of reverence for a Saint, but rather like those watching actors on a stage.

Especially Taiyuan in the middle. When Hongjun looked over, he actually smiled and raised his teacup in a toast.

As if to say: "You do your thing, don't mind us. We're just here for the show."

This was supposed to be a sermon at the Purple Cloud Palace!

Not a tea party!

The entire atmosphere had gone completely off the rails!

The tragic drama that should have unfolded – Hongyun giving up his seat, Kunpeng being expelled, Jieyin and Zhunti crying pitifully – was completely ruined by the intrusion of these three.

Even if Zhunti wanted to cry now, he couldn't muster the emotion while lying on that soft chair!

Hongjun took a deep breath, forcibly suppressing the impulse to throw these three out of the Purple Cloud Palace.

Forget it.

Heaven's will had changed, but this Dao still had to be taught.

It was just that this opening speech felt a bit awkward to say no matter how he phrased it.

Meanwhile.

In Taiyuan's mind, the long-awaited voice finally rang out.

[Ding! Detected that the host has completely destroyed the tragic atmosphere of the "Purple Cloud Palace seat-snatching" historical scene.]
[Successfully transformed the "tragic drama" into a "divine tycoon vacation drama" and caused the Dao Ancestor Hongjun's mindset to fluctuate.]
[Congratulations to the host for completing the major plot node mission!]
[Super reward issued: Chaos Green Lotus Seed x1.]

A seed, emitting a faint green light and entwined with thirty-six Great Dao restrictions on its surface, quietly appeared in Taiyuan's System space.

The extremely dense life aura made one's soul feel like it was about to sublimate, even with just a glance.

It's done!

Taiyuan was ecstatic. The Enlightenment Tea in his hand instantly lost its appeal.

With this, he would have enough even if he dug up and re-forged all the broken spiritual veins in the West in the future.

This trip to the Purple Cloud Palace was absolutely worth it!