Gaming Chair "Cruel Torture"

As the great powers of the Primordial Era stared dumbfounded at the "shocking renovation" inside the Purple Heaven Palace, questioning the very nature of their existence, a lazy, yawning voice echoed from the back of the grand hall.

"Ahhh--Who is it, knocking so early... Oh, quite a few people have arrived?"

Accompanied by the sound of footsteps, Xiao Kuang, rubbing his sleepy eyes, emerged from the back hall. He was wearing a crooked set of pajamas conjured from Chaos Qi (styled like an old man's undershirt and shorts), and shuffling in flip-flops.

His appearance and attire, in this "solemn and majestic" (not really) Purple Heaven Palace, nearly blinded all the great powers present!

However, before they could recover from this new wave of visual shock, a few people in the crowd instantly recognized his face!

"It's you?!!!" The Three Pure Ones exclaimed almost simultaneously, their eyes wide open! Primordial Lord of Heaven trembled with rage, pointing a finger at Xiao Kuang: "Villain! Treasure-stealing villain! How dare you be here?!"

Almost at the same time, Gong Gong from the Ancestral Witch group (though he had resumed human form, his face was still a bit charred) also jumped up fiercely, his bell-like eyes filled with a mixture of shock and anger: "It's that damned lightning-struck bastard?! What are you doing here?!"

Enemies meeting, hatred intensifies!

New and old grudges surged to the surface. Primordial Lord of Heaven and Gong Gong, almost instinctively, were about to unleash their Spiritual Treasures/reveal their true forms to blast this shameless fellow into oblivion! It didn't matter if this was the Purple Heaven Palace or not!

But their movements were fast, and the Heavenly Dao (forced to work) reacted even faster!

[Heavenly Dao: Detected strong hostility and aggressive intent towards the acting agent... Triggering automatic defense mechanism... Invoking... Purple Firmament Divine Thunder (minimum power taunt version)...]

Boom! Boom!

Two slender but extremely fast and precise purple lightning snakes, as if they had eyes, appeared out of thin air and unceremoniously struck the foreheads of Primordial Lord of Heaven and Gong Gong, who had just made a move!

"Ugh!" "Aow!"

Two short screams.

The jade crown on Primordial Lord of Heaven's head was knocked askew, his hair disheveled, his handsome face instantly blackened, a wisp of smoke rising from his mouth. His body stiffened, frozen in the posture of unleashing his Jade Ruyi, unable to move.

Gong Gong had it worse. The Water Origin Power he had just condensed scattered instantly, turning him into an "outer burnt, inner tender" state again. His hair stood on end, and he remained in a lunging stance with a clenched fist, his body twitching, his eyeballs rolling.

Laozi and Tongtian among the Three Pure Ones, as well as Di Jun, Tai Yi, Nuwa, and all the other great powers nearby, all gasped, forcefully suppressing the exclamations and any hostile thoughts that were about to escape their lips!

Purple Heaven Divine Thunder! It was Purple Heaven Divine Thunder again! In this Purple Heaven Palace, one could actually summon the Heavenly Dao's divine thunder to strike people at will?! And it struck Primordial Lord of Heaven, one of the Three Pure Ones, and Gong Gong, the Ancestral Witch!

This guy wearing shorts, a tank top, and flip-flops, with sleepy eyes... could he really be... the Dao Ancestor?!

At this moment, no one doubted his identity anymore. There was only endless shock, absurdity, and deep apprehension! The style and methods of this Dao Ancestor were too damn bizarre!

Xiao Kuang was also startled by the sudden lightning strike. He patted his chest, then looked at the miserable states of his two old acquaintances, especially Primordial Lord of Heaven, who looked like he wanted to get angry but dared not, trembling all over. Xiao Kuang almost burst out laughing.

He suppressed his laughter, coughed twice, and waved his hand: "Cough, cough, silence, silence! No shouting or fighting in the Purple Heaven Palace! Considering it's your first offense, this is a small punishment. Don't let it happen again!"

His gaze swept over the silent crowd below. He saw the six conspicuous ergonomic gaming chairs and remembered that these seemed to be "VIP seats." So, he casually asked, "Oh right, these six chairs in the front, who wants to sit?"

Swish!

As soon as he finished speaking, all the great powers, whether it was the Three Pure Ones (except for the stunned Primordial Lord of Heaven), Di Jun and Tai Yi, Kunpeng, Zhen Yuanzi, Hong Yun... almost uniformly and with perfect tacit understanding, took a large step backward!

It was as if those six chairs were not opportunities but some terrifying torture devices!

What a joke! Didn't they see the first one who dared to cause trouble get struck by lightning? These chairs looked extremely strange. Who knew if sitting on them would violate some heavenly rule? This Dao Ancestor didn't play by the rules at all; it was better to play it safe!

Xiao Kuang looked at the empty six seats and the crowd that had collectively retreated. His mouth twitched: "...Is it that serious?"

[Heavenly Dao:...Hint...The front seats contain opportunities...Important targets need to be guided to sit...(Voice weak)]

The Heavenly Dao had to remind this scoundrel who had forgotten the script.

Xiao Kuang then remembered that there was something like that. He scratched his head and started calling out names: "You, you, you, and you two, yes, you three brothers (referring to the Three Pure Ones), and you (referring to Nuwa), and those two guys with bitter expressions over there (referring to Jieyin and Zhunti), come here, sit here!"

The named Three Pure Ones (Laozi and Tongtian helped up the charred Primordial Lord of Heaven), Nuwa, Jieyin, and Zhunti, their expressions instantly became incredibly complicated.

Sit? Or not sit?

Looking at Xiao Kuang's "If you don't sit, I'll strike you" (kind and) benevolent (evil) gaze, and with the still smoking Primordial Lord of Heaven and Gong Gong beside them as a warning...

The five people (Jieyin and Zhunti counted as two) exchanged glances, seeing unparalleled frustration and helplessness in each other's eyes.

Finally, led by Laozi of the Three Pure Ones, the five people (plus the half-paralyzed Primordial Lord of Heaven) walked extremely slowly, as if heading to their deaths, towards the six gaming chairs.

The moment they hesitantly sat down with a sense of tragic heroism—

"Buzz..." The gaming chair's sensors detected their weight and automatically activated! The lumbar support lifted! The headrest rose! The armrests adjusted! There was even a slight vibration massage function!

"Uh!" "Ah!" "What is this?!" "My back!" "Hiss... it's a bit comfortable?"

Five exclamations and groans of varying degrees sounded simultaneously!

When had the Three Pure Ones ever experienced such "technology and fierce craftsmanship"? They only felt that the things beneath them were incredibly strange, automatically conforming to their body curves. An indescribable tingling sensation spread from their waists, almost causing their Dao hearts to falter! Primordial Lord of Heaven, on top of the numbness from the electric shock, felt the superimposed massage, which was so intensely pleasurable that he rolled his eyes.

Empress Nuwa exclaimed, startled by the sudden vibration, her pretty face flushing slightly. She felt that this chair... was rather disrespectful! Jieyin and Zhunti felt their bottoms vibrating and bouncing, almost thinking it was another form of punishment. They were so scared they almost jumped up, but after realizing it seemed harmless, they reluctantly settled down with bitter faces.

The six future destined Saints, in these bizarre ergonomic chairs, experienced unprecedented "torture devices," letting out unholy cries and groans, making the scene quite awkward.

Those below watched with goosebumps, even more grateful that they hadn't sat in those "torture chairs."

Xiao Kuang looked at their expressions and pouted, "Country bumpkins, never seen high-end stuff before, have you?" He snapped his fingers and shouted towards the back hall, "Hey, you! Dragon Girl, Phoenix Girl, Kirin Girl, come out and work! Serve tea to our fellow Daoists!"

Immediately, a group of girls from the Dragon, Phoenix, and Kirin races, with peerless beauty but wearing unified conjured outfits (similar to modern maid outfits but more ethereal), came out timidly. They carried teacups made of Chaos Spirit Jade (filled with Chaos Tea Leaves) and began distributing "tea" to the great powers below.

Those great powers looked at these noble ladies of the Three Innate Races, who should have been proud, now acting as tea servers. They all kept their eyes focused, not daring to breathe loudly, their hands trembling slightly as they accepted the teacups.

This Purple霄 Palace, from the inside out, from top to bottom, exuded an air of strangeness!

[Heavenly Dao:...(((;￢＿￢)))...] [Detected extremely unprofessional preaching atmosphere... Acting agent's behavior seriously deviates from preset... ] [Core request:...Stop playing...Start preaching quickly...Wasting time is wasting life (Primordial version)...]

The Heavenly Dao's will, laced with an almost broken weariness, urged Xiao Kuang once more.

Only then did Xiao Kuang reluctantly walk to the frontmost luxurious massage reclining chair, plop down onto it, and the chair emitted a comfortable hum, automatically adjusting to the optimal lounging angle.

He picked up the microphone beside him, blew into it (producing a harsh static), and looked at the group of Primordial Era great powers below, who were either sitting up straight or slumped in their gaming chairs with numb expressions. He lazily opened his mouth:

"Alright, alright, is everyone here? You there, close the door. This session of our 'Primordial Dao Seminar' will now officially begin!"

"Our first lecture today will mainly discuss... uh... On the Importance of Sustainable Slacking for the Spiritual Civilization Construction of the Primordial Era..."