Traffic Laws

[Unfortunately, your emperor only teased Ah Yin, the Snow Empress, and the Ice Empress. He had no intention of opening the floodgates.]

[The three women were unhappy, but getting to see you rise to the occasion had already felt pretty good.]

[In the thirtieth year of the Simulation, you discovered that your daily expenses had begun to outstrip your income. Ah Yin and the others handled nearly all the money you earned, so it took you several days to realize they had spent it all on tonics. They simply craved your body too much. Ah Yin especially—after experiencing it twice, she could not get enough of you. The Snow Empress and the Ice Empress had tried eating cucumbers and the like to cool themselves down, but it had done little good.]

[In the thirty-first year of the Simulation, you were fed Spring Autumn Sausage version 3.06. Unfortunately, no matter how Ah Yin, the Ice Empress, and the Snow Empress teased, tempted, or seduced you, you remained unmoved. Not the slightest reaction.]

[You saw the ravenous looks in their eyes and felt that if you let things continue, they would spiral out of control.]

[You packed your bags and fled overnight, heading to the Forest of Life to find Su Yiner. You hoped your daughter still remembered her old man and would shelter you for a while.]

[You flew east on the Flying Sword you had bought not long ago. Along the way, you ran into Ning Rongrong, who had already ascended. You did not stop to greet her. You poured on the speed and fled.]

[Ning Rongrong was puzzled. Then she stared blankly as Ah Yin, the Snow Empress, and the Ice Empress chased after you on flying brooms held together with mortise-and-tenon joints.]

["Damn it! I took out a loan for a hundred thousand God Two Coin to buy this Flying Sword! How the hell is it slower than flying on my own? I'm so sick of the Divine Realm's ridiculous rules." You were speechless. If free flight in the Divine Realm had not required a free-flight license available only to Second-Level Gods and above, you would never have spent a hundred thousand on a Flying Sword. Gods below that rank, along with ordinary residents, had to rely on Flying Sword or flying-broom licenses.]

[You wanted to secretly give the Flying Sword a little boost, but you were afraid some busybody would notice. If you were caught, you would face ten days in jail, have your sword impounded, and lose your flying-sword license.]

[You looked back at Ah Yin, the Ice Empress, and the Snow Empress as they closed in, then ahead at the entrance to the Forest of Life. You pushed the Flying Sword to its top speed, pulled out the hundred thousand God Two Coin you had scraped together by selling off your belongings, and handed them to the staff as fast as you could. With a long-term sightseeing ticket in hand, you entered the Forest of Life.]

[With no money, Ah Yin, the Ice Empress, and the Snow Empress could only stand at the ticket booth and watch you disappear in frustration.]

["Damn you, Su Ming! We only want a bite of your chicken wrap! Did you really have to run?" The Ice Empress felt terribly wronged. She had only tasted that chicken wrap once, but she could not stop thinking about it.]

["Su Ming, if you leave, you'd better not come back!" the Snow Empress shouted in fury.]

[Ah Yin pulled out a free-entry green card the Life God King had given her, waved it at the entrance, and pointed to the Ice Empress and the Snow Empress. "The three of us are together."]

[Ah Yin was Su Yiner's birth mother. Since the Life God King had taken her child to raise herself, she naturally had to offer Ah Yin something in return. The green card let her move freely through the Forest of Life with up to five companions, without flight restrictions or other obstacles.]

[After verifying the card, the staff member stepped aside. "Honored guests, please come in."]

[You had barely gotten away when you saw this from atop your Flying Sword. Your eyes nearly popped out. "Holy crap! This is rigged! How come my wife gets a green card and I don't? Life God King, you can't play favorites like this!"]

[You breathed a sigh of relief when you saw the three women were still chasing you on their flying brooms, then tensed again. There was good news and bad news. The good news was that they could not catch your Flying Sword using Soul Power flight, so they had to keep using their brooms. The bad news was that they had gotten inside.]

[The four of you staged a high-speed chase above the Forest of Life. You drifted around bend after bend with expert skill, but Ah Yin and the others stayed on your tail. You could not shake them.]

[At the Life God King's residence, you shot into the sky and dropped straight down in front of her as she told Su Yiner a story. Your landing was far from graceful: your upper body plunged into the ground, leaving only your legs flailing in the air.]

[The Life God King sat on a swing with little Su Yiner in her arms. She looked at you in confusion, showing no anger or displeasure.]

[After struggling a few times, you pulled yourself out of the ground, hurried over to Su Yiner, and took her into your arms.]

["My dear daughter, hurry and save your old man. Your mother and your two godmothers are about to tear me apart." You complained about Ah Yin and the others while appealing to Su Yiner's love for her father.]

["Old man, I'd love to help you, but when disaster strikes, everyone looks out for themselves. I don't want Mom to hit me, so you'll just have to work a little harder. Try to make me a few older brothers and sisters soon." Su Yiner said the words you least wanted to hear in the purest, most innocent voice.]

[Heartbroken, you pointed at the Life God King and demanded, "Life God King, you may be a God King, but look what you've taught my child! Her mouth is full of filthy talk. Is this how a God King raises a child?"]

[Your accusation left the Life God King flustered. "I'm sorry. I truly didn't realize little Yiner would pick up bad habits. I didn't mean for this to happen. This is my first time raising a child, too."]

[You seized the opening. "Since you recognize your mistake, I can't just stand by as her father. From now on, let me stay here and teach my daughter."]

[You spoke with such conviction that the Life God King fell for it. She was just about to agree when Ah Yin, the Ice Empress, and the Snow Empress dropped from the sky. Their landing, however, was even more spectacular than yours had been.]

[Ah Yin landed on your neck, the Snow Empress landed on Ah Yin's, and the Ice Empress landed on the Snow Empress's. Su Yiner looked up at the human tower, her little mouth hanging wide open.]

[You wanted to run, but there was nowhere to go. Cornered and out of options, you could only drop to your knees and beg for mercy.]

["Please let me go! My dear wives, I'm begging you. I honestly can't feel a thing! If you have to, go hire some male escorts! Just leave me alone, all right?" Once the three women climbed off you and the Life God King took Su Yiner back into her arms, you knelt and pleaded.]

[Unfortunately, your resistance looked like nothing more than a waste of effort to them.]