Ch. 21I Usually Don't Laugh, Unless I Can't Help It

After the Hogwarts feast, William watched the Weasley twins’ stolen homework answers spark a chaotic fight that sent Oliver Wood’s smelly signed shoe ricocheting through the Great Hall. The shoe drenched Snape in milk, and McGonagall ended the incident with a 30-point Gryffindor penalty while Dumbledore and the professors tried not to laugh.

  • William reflected on teaching Hogwarts students catchy songs after everyone sang the school song to different tunes.
  • Percy Weasley confronted George and Fred Weasley after discovering they had copied and sold his summer homework answers without paying him.
  • George batted Oliver Wood’s shoe across the Great Hall, prompting Wood to realize it was his signed flying shoe and demand its return.
  • Snape diverted the shoe toward Professor Tywin, who dodged it; Hagrid’s umbrella then bounced it back toward the High Table.
  • The shoe splashed milk over Snape, and Professor McGonagall deducted 30 points from Gryffindor for the Weasleys’ and Percy’s fooling around.
  • Dumbledore made excuses about the incident, while McGonagall struggled to suppress her laughter as Snape glared at them.

Ch. 22The Eagle-shaped Bronze Knocker

William and the other Ravenclaw first-years reached their common room, where the Eagle-shaped Bronze Knocker tested them with a string of riddles. After Robert welcomed them and showed them to their dormitory, William fell asleep and dreamed the knocker swallowed him.

  • Professor Flitwick sent the Ravenclaws away from the trouble to prevent a fight between the houses.
  • Robert explained how the Eagle-shaped Bronze Knocker guarded the common room, and Cho answered its first riddle with “Air.”
  • Robert repeatedly shut the door and asked more riddles, while William supplied answers until the first-years had spent half an hour outside.
  • Robert welcomed the students to the Ravenclaw Common Room and described the house’s values, emblem, and colors.
  • The prefects led the first-years to their dormitory, where Bobocha had established dominance over the other pets.
  • William fell asleep beside Bobocha after looking out at the Black Lake and Forbidden Forest, and dreamed that a monstrous knocker swallowed him.

Ch. 23The Cat Trap

William got lost on his way to breakfast at Hogwarts, where Mrs. Norris unexpectedly led him to the dining hall. There, Cedric asked about Cho, and William teased him about his interest in her.

  • William struggled to find the dining hall among Hogwarts's shifting staircases and corridors.
  • Bobocha spotted Mrs. Norris, and the two cats stared each other down before Mrs. Norris walked away.
  • William followed Mrs. Norris through out-of-the-way corridors and reached the dining hall safely.
  • William offered Mrs. Norris dried fish, but she ignored him and left after glancing at Bobocha.
  • Cedric joined William at the Ravenclaw table and asked why Cho was not with him.
  • Cedric explained that students often sought partners from other Houses, and William wondered if Cedric's questions about Cho revealed his own interest.

Ch. 24Snape Takes You to Hear Ghost Stories

William received Cedric’s Hogwarts map and proposed creating a magical map that could track changing routes and show the quickest paths. In Potions, Snape punished William for his late classmates’ arrival before delivering an ominous introduction to the subject.

  • Cedric gave William his handwritten Hogwarts map and joked that Bobocha might be Mrs. Norris’s lost kitten.
  • William proposed a magical map that tracked shifting routes and found the shortest path, and Cedric agreed to help recruit George and Fred.
  • Cedric left to speak with the twins while William and Cho headed to class, and Bobocha fled from a floating Persian cat specimen outside the Potions classroom.
  • Snape berated the late Ravenclaw students and took a point from Ravenclaw, blaming William for not guiding them.
  • Snape introduced potion-making as a subtle science and exact art, prompting William to imagine him hosting ghost stories on the radio.

Ch. 25An Accident in Potions Class

Snape challenged William in Potions class, then made him brew a Cure for Boils Potion alone. The lesson ended in chaos when Marietta's mistake ruined Cho's cauldron and left Snape scalded and covered in boils.

  • Snape quizzed William, awarded Ravenclaw one point, then deducted two points for failing to address him as Professor.
  • Snape explained his preferred brewing methods and ordered the students to make a Cure for Boils Potion in pairs, while making William work alone.
  • William brewed his potion correctly, but Marietta accidentally poked Snape with her wand while working near Cho.
  • Marietta's mistake caused Cho's cauldron to spill acidic potion, and Snape fell face-first into William's still-hot potion.
  • Snape ended up soaked, scalded, and covered in boils.

Ch. 26Dumbledore Acting Awfully Gay

William treated Snape and Marietta after a Potions Class accident, then discussed his Hogwarts map with Dumbledore. Dumbledore warned him to keep dangerous secrets hidden and suggested he send Snape a get-well card too.

  • William cooled his finished Cure for Boils potion and used it to heal Snape and Marietta after Marietta’s cauldron accident.
  • Bell Lyme poured the rest of William’s potion over Snape and Marietta, clearing their boils, and Snape took them to Madam Pomfrey.
  • William told the students to stop brewing potions while Snape and Marietta were examined in the Hospital Wing.
  • Dumbledore arrived, awarded Ravenclaw House fifty points for William’s actions, and walked with William after Snape was treated.
  • William told Dumbledore about his plan to make a map of Hogwarts, and Dumbledore cautioned him against revealing secret passages and mentioned a castle floor plan in the library.
  • Dumbledore told William to send Snape a get-well card, leaving William to wonder whether Dumbledore was acting awfully gay.

Ch. 27The Marauder's Map

After Professor Snape’s classroom accident, William became a Hogwarts sensation and joined George and Fred to discuss making a map. The twins showed him an enchanted parchment they had taken from Filch, but Professor McGonagall caught them and assigned the twins another punishment.

  • Rumors spread that William had caused Snape to explode, and George and Fred celebrated him at the Gryffindor table.
  • William asked George and Fred for help making a map, and they revealed an old parchment they had taken from Filch’s confiscated-items drawer.
  • The twins explained that the parchment was a map of Hogwarts and that they were still learning how to use it.
  • Professor McGonagall caught the three of them with the parchment, praised William for helping Snape, and warned them against pranks.
  • Professor McGonagall ordered George and Fred to polish the trophy-room silver by hand with Filch that night.

Ch. 28Professor Tywin

William attended a drowsy History of Magic lesson with Professor Binns before Professor Tywin introduced practical Defence Against the Dark Arts and discussed vampires. The class left with Tywin praising William and awarding Ravenclaw five points, while Slytherin students remained hostile toward William.

  • Professor Binns droned about Emeric the Evil and Uric the Oddball as students, including Cho, struggled to stay awake.
  • Bobocha startled Cho awake by knocking away her textbook, causing her face to crash toward the desk and frighten a rabbit.
  • Slytherin students tried to annoy William during Professor Tywin's first Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson by making noise.
  • Professor Tywin explained that his lessons would focus on practical experience and praised William for his Ravenclaw qualities, provoking hostile stares from Slytherin.
  • Cho named vampires as a threat, and Professor Tywin warned students against falling in love with one before promising Miss Crouch he would teach her how to deal with them in third year.
  • Professor Tywin awarded Ravenclaw five points.

Ch. 29Grindylow

Professor Tywin took his students to a practical Defence Against Dark Magic lesson, demonstrated a spell on Peeves, and introduced them to a Grindylow. The lesson began with William identifying the creature and earning five points for Ravenclaw.

  • Professor Tywin led the class out of the classroom and warned Peeves to get rid of balloons filled with Dungbomb slop.
  • Professor Tywin cast Ah~ Porcupine, bursting the balloons and sending their contents onto Peeves, then cleaned up with Whirlwind Sweep.
  • Professor Tywin brought the class to a training room containing a Grindylow caught in the Black Lake and explained that the lake held many magical creatures.
  • Judy Crouch protested that dangerous creatures lived near the school and threatened to write to her uncle.
  • William described the Grindylow’s appearance and long fingers, and Professor Tywin awarded five points to Ravenclaw.

Ch. 30The Magical Extraction Charm

Professor Tywin taught the class to use the Extraction Charm on Grindylows, but Judy accidentally removed the bones from his right leg. A Grindylow then attacked, Marietta’s magical outburst shattered the expanded tank, and six creatures chased the students into a panicked rush for the door.

  • Professor Tywin explained the Extraction Charm and opened the tank for Judy Crouch to try it on a Grindylow.
  • Judy cast the charm and removed one of the Grindylow’s claws, and Arthur and the other students took turns casting it.
  • Judy accidentally hit Professor Tywin with the charm, extracting the bones from his right leg and knocking him to the floor.
  • A Grindylow lunged at Cho and Marietta, and Marietta’s magical outburst shattered the tank.
  • Six Grindylows emerged from the tank as the students fled, trampling Professor Tywin on the way out.

Ch. 31William's Magical Talent

William took charge when Grindylows trapped the Ravenclaw students, revealing powerful magical talent and helping the class regain control. After the students dealt with the remaining creatures, he spoke with Professor Tywin, who praised him and hinted at gifted former classmates, one dead and another in Azkaban.

  • Bradley and Marcus discovered the classroom door was locked while Marietta remained trapped near the Grindylows.
  • William stopped Cho from rushing forward and killed a Grindylow with Hasek, shocking the Ravenclaw students with his power.
  • William used Ah~ Puncture to turn the tank shards into spikes, then organized the students into pairs to fight the remaining Grindylows.
  • Cho checked on the terrified Marietta before joining the students dealing with the creatures.
  • William returned Professor Tywin's wand and helped him up as Tywin praised William's talent and mentioned former Gryffindor classmates, one dead and another in Azkaban.

Ch. 32Snape's Love Letter (Merry Christmas, First Update)

William became notorious after Professors Snape and Tywin were hospitalized, while a love note exposed Tywin and Snape’s bitter history. The chapter ended with Flitwick keeping students from using wands in Charms and Ravenclaw leading the House competition by a wide margin.

  • Madam Pomfrey treated Tywin and Snape in the hospital wing and scolded them for letting students practice dangerous magic.
  • Tywin summoned a rose bouquet from the rubbish, read its love note to Snape, and provoked a confrontation by accusing Snape of betraying James and causing the Dark Lord’s death.
  • Madam Pomfrey stopped Tywin and Snape from fighting and sent William out of the hospital wing.
  • Hogwarts students spread the nickname “professor killer” for William, while Ravenclaw students celebrated his classroom performance.
  • Flitwick made students practice wand movements with sticks instead of wands, and awarded William a point before telling him to stop.
  • William’s recent accidents earned Ravenclaw 120 points, leaving the House far ahead in the standings.

Ch. 33Bobocha on the Attack

William attended Transfiguration with Cho and Bobocha, confident that Professor McGonagall would avoid the classroom accidents that had happened earlier. He realized McGonagall was the tabby cat on the teacher’s desk just as Bobocha approached her and offered his dried fish.

  • William reflected on his slow progress in Transfiguration compared with Cedric’s talent and success.
  • William and Cho entered the classroom, where Gryffindor students kept their distance from William and wondered why Professor McGonagall had not arrived.
  • Bobocha sensed an unusual scent and spotted a tabby cat crouching on the teacher’s desk.
  • William recognized the tabby as McGonagall after Bobocha leapt across the classroom toward her with his dried fish.
  • Bobocha offered the fish to McGonagall, then lay down and invited her to lick his fur.

Ch. 34Eloise in Flames

Professor McGonagall taught the first-years the theory of Transfiguration, then had them practice turning matches into needles. William succeeded ahead of schedule, but McLaggen accidentally set Eloise Midgen's hair on fire, leaving the class in chaos.

  • Professor McGonagall revealed herself from her cat form and demonstrated Transfiguration on Bobocha.
  • Professor McGonagall lectured on Transfiguration theory before assigning the students to turn matches into needles.
  • William transformed his match into a rough iron needle, earning a point for Ravenclaw.
  • McLaggen's match caught fire after he accidentally released gas, and he flung it into Eloise Midgen's hair.
  • Eloise Midgen's greasy hair caught fire, turning her into an oversized match.

Ch. 35Snape, the Cross-Dressing King

William discussed his Transfiguration progress and the history between Snape and Professor Tywin with Professor McGonagall. Meanwhile, rumors about Snape spread across Hogwarts, and the Weasley brothers’ prank turned him into the school’s cross-dressing king.

  • McLaggen accidentally burned Eloise’s hair, and Professor McGonagall deducted five points from Gryffindor before sending Eloise to the Hospital Wing.
  • Professor McGonagall praised William’s diligence, learned that Cedric had helped him over the summer, and told him James Potter had been a talented Transfiguration student.
  • William asked whether Snape and Professor Tywin had been in conflict, but Professor McGonagall told him to focus on his studies.
  • Snape left the Hospital Wing and began deducting points while trying to find who had spread rumors that someone had confessed their love to him.
  • The Weasley brothers’ love letter and Lee Jordan’s Lolita dress fueled rumors that Snape was a cross-dressing king.

Ch. 36Fluffy the Three-Headed Dog

William, Cedric, and Cho visited Hagrid and met Fluffy, his three-headed dog, whom Hagrid had kept secret from Professor Dumbledore. The visit ended with Cedric warning that the Ministry would kill Fluffy if it discovered Hagrid was keeping him illegally, leaving Hagrid alarmed.

  • William, Cedric, and Cho visited Hagrid’s hut, where William fed Fang snacks brought for Bobocha.
  • Hagrid showed them Fluffy, whose three heads he called Damao, Ermao, and Sanmao, and fed him dried fish.
  • Fluffy rushed at Fang for milk, but Fang fled, and Hagrid sang Fluffy to sleep.
  • Cedric asked whether Hagrid had told Professor Dumbledore about Fluffy, and Hagrid admitted he had not.
  • Cedric warned Hagrid that keeping Fluffy was illegal and that the Ministry would kill him if he was discovered, leaving Hagrid pale with fear.

Ch. 37The Ministry of Magic Attack

William and his friends questioned Hagrid about the conflict between Snape and Professor Tywin, but Hagrid would only say that Dumbledore trusted Snape. A newspaper report about the Ministry of Magic break-in left Hagrid fearing that Fluffy had been illegally smuggled from the department.

  • William asked Hagrid whether Snape and Professor Tywin had a grudge, and Hagrid said Tywin had been an unremarkable Ravenclaw.
  • Hagrid recalled the feud between James Potter and Snape, blamed Sirius Black for betraying James, and refused to explain what Snape had done.
  • Hagrid changed the subject to Gryffindor Quidditch tryouts, and Cedric argued that Hufflepuff had the stronger team.
  • William found a newspaper clipping reporting an unresolved break-in at the Ministry of Magic's Department for the Regulation of Fantastic Beasts.
  • Hagrid connected the August 1 break-in to the Greek who sold him Fluffy and worried that the dog had been illegally smuggled from the department.

Ch. 38Quidditch Training Ground Brawl

William, Cedric, and Cho reached the Gryffindor Quidditch tryouts and found a brawl after Cormac McLaggen crashed into Angelina Johnson and injured George Weasley. When McLaggen then knocked Charlie Weasley unconscious, William used a spell to send the Quaffle into McLaggen, and the crowd dragged him away.

  • Cedric told William that he had never heard of the Ministry seizing a three-headed dog or being attacked, leaving William to wonder what the Ministry was hiding.
  • William, Cedric, and Cho arrived at the Quidditch training ground and found Angelina unconscious, George bleeding, and Fred being restrained from attacking McLaggen.
  • A Gryffindor student explained that McLaggen had lost control of a broom and crashed into Angelina during the celebrations, striking George with the broom handle.
  • Charlie ordered McLaggen to leave the tryouts, but McLaggen blamed Charlie and threatened to complain to his uncle.
  • After Eloise tripped McLaggen, he picked up a bat and struck the Quaffle, which hit Charlie and knocked him unconscious.
  • William cast Waddiwasi to send the Quaffle into McLaggen, who crashed into a goalpost as the crowd rushed to help the injured.

Ch. 39Anne and Dumbledore

William received a letter and photographs from Anne, who had been writing to Professor Dumbledore every day. He revealed that Dumbledore had enchanted Drogon's ring to carry letters, and Drogon flew off to deliver Anne's next letter to him.

  • Cedric nervously prepared for Hufflepuff Quidditch tryouts while the others reassured him after Charlie Weasley fractured his skull in practice.
  • Drogon and Milia arrived with a letter from Anne, and Milia tricked Cho and the others into giving her snacks.
  • William shared Anne's photographs with his friends, who teased him about his sister and joked about introducing her to George.
  • William explained that Professor Dumbledore had enchanted Drogon's ring to conceal and protect letters.
  • William said Anne called Dumbledore 'Dear Grandpa Albus' and revealed that Drogon was carrying another letter to him.

Ch. 40A Politician's Tactics

William and the others read a Daily Prophet report linking Lucius Malfoy's wand to the attack on the Ministry of Magic. William concluded that Minister Fudge was using Malfoy as a scapegoat to distract the public from the Ministry's failure to find the real attacker.

  • William opened the special edition of the Daily Prophet and showed everyone a report claiming Lucius Malfoy's wand had been found at the Ministry attack scene.
  • Cho questioned whether Malfoy could have staged the attack, while George condemned the Malfoys and Cedric noted that Malfoy had been fighting in Diagon Alley.
  • Fred and George explained that Mad-Eye Moody had caught Malfoy selling a cursed necklace at Borgin and Burkes on the night of the attack.
  • Cho pointed out that Malfoy's outing seemed to rule him out as the attacker, and William explained that the Ministry was presenting him as a scapegoat.
  • William reasoned that Fudge had used the Daily Prophet's coverage of the Weasley-Malfoy feud to divert attention from the attack and judged the Minister a shrewd politician.
Show
Page 2 of 57
Page 2 of 57