Time Never Stays, the Seasons Flow By

On the minor matter of transmigration.

How did his transmigrator predecessors get through their dreary early childhoods?

Based on his own experience, Lu Ye solemnly declared:

One star! Two thumbs and two big toes down!

By now, Lu Ye had been in the world of the Pirate King for over three years, yet as a Celestial Dragon, he somehow couldn't find any time to oppress the locals. It was outrageous!

Granted, his equipment was still rather immature, but surely it wouldn't be too much to snatch a few little girls to raise as his future wives?

The mere fact that he couldn't stray too far from his food had kept Lu Ye firmly confined to his blond Pops' new palace for three whole years!

In those three years, Lu Ye hadn't even set foot outside the Donquixote Family's residential compound.

Garling had once invited his blond Pops to move into Pangaea Castle, but Lu Ye had tugged on his blond Pops' beard and refused again and again. When you had a villa in the country, who the hell would envy a big apartment in the city?

Because of his history of demolishing a home on a massive scale, Lu Ye had also gained the title of "Mad King" among the Celestial Dragons. The other Celestial Dragons all avoided Homing's family, terrified that innocent bystanders would suffer when Lu Ye had another episode. Several nearby castles had been vacated.

Over those three years, aside from his blond Pops, Lady Daisy, and the two little blonds, Doffy and Rosy, the people Lu Ye saw most were Sullivan and the Hoffman Squad.

When Garling heard that Lu Ye had returned to normal, he sent his most capable agents to Lu Ye's side.

Aside from the Hoffman Squad, the other CP Agents were also willing to get close to Lu Ye, dropping by now and then to earn his favor.

No merit surpassed saving one's sovereign. No crime surpassed rebellion.

The "Mad King" Longinus, with his boundless potential, was a collective first-class merit for all CP Agents.

At Lu Ye's first birthday banquet, Sullivan was honorably promoted to his personal butler.

When Sullivan heard the news, his once-innocent smile suddenly became terribly forced, and he nearly burst into tears.

Lu Ye pursed his lips, thinking he probably wasn't the reason.

Sullivan had always been strongly opposed to working with the leopard-headed, round-eyed Hoffman. It was understandable: every time Hoffman looked at him, it was as though he were looking at a chicken waiting to be slaughtered.

No joke!

Sullivan was certain that Hoffman was waiting for an order to kill him, whereupon that killer would thrust a Shigan through his throat without a moment's hesitation!

After his promotion, Sullivan also received three subordinates, likewise a gift from the Hero King Garling.

The three men wore black suits and sunglasses, and were burly and muscular, with resolute, valiant faces. They called themselves chefs and greeted Sullivan in unison as their boss.

This time, Sullivan really did cry.

The three brothers carried broadswords on their backs, each a full two meters long and gleaming with a chilling light. One swing could chop seven or eight heads to pieces. What kind of chef needed a knife that big?!

Later, Sullivan heard some gossip: the three weren't just swordsmen, but swordmasters capable of cutting iron.

Sullivan immediately broke down sobbing. "I really just want to be a little butler!"

Since the major home-demolition incident, his blond Pops had given up on his dream of returning to an ordinary life and devoted himself wholeheartedly to his family.

As an aside, reading to a certain little bastard took up the vast majority of his time, so much so that his uncle's four-child policy still hadn't been put into effect, and the dark circles under his eyes grew heavier.

Lu Ye wasn't deliberately making him suffer. His blond Pops himself was determined to be a good father, so he maintained his old routine, insisting on reading mob novels to his unfilial son every night for his early education.

Lu Ye had simply... uh, not stopped him.

You couldn't blame Lu Ye for being heartless. Life was just so fucking boring!

From eating once every fifteen minutes at first to once every half hour now, his meals came as thick and fast as late-autumn rain.

Shameless as it was to say, Lu Ye had actually come to find eating painful. It felt like clocking in at a sweatshop.

The problem was, Lu Ye had never fucking had a job!

On countless quiet nights, Homing's stories had been the only thing keeping him going.

After turning one, Lu Ye left all kinds of animal milk behind and switched to a diet consisting mainly of meat, supplemented with various sugary, high-calorie desserts.

Bobo the Sea King, an outstanding employee of the Holy Land for three hundred years, had slimmed down around the cheeks after feeding Lu Ye for a year. The plump, black-and-white spotted manatee had been reduced to a scrawny spotted dog that looked as though it hadn't eaten in three months, and tearfully demanded to terminate her milk-supply agreement with the Holy Land.

When Hoffman personally went over and told Bobo that Lu Ye had been weaned, the mountain-sized manatee was so moved that she beat her chest and stamped her feet, weeping bitterly.

As for the other animals on the ranch, they all breathed a long sigh.

Well, as mentioned earlier, after Lu Ye was weaned, his diet consisted mainly of meat, and his appetite was enormous.

In less than a year, more than half the ranch had been emptied. A shout would produce an echo.

Bobo lived there alone, and at night she often heard ghostly cries-baa, moo, woof, meow...

It was especially unnerving for a cow.

Hoffman, Flora, and Evan: Cipher Pol's strongest agents in recent years, the Hero King Garling's personal guards, a deluxe team of champions.

After being assigned to Lu Ye, the work they did most was taking a warship to the Calm Belt to hunt Sea Kings.

Only in the world of the Pirate King could you spit into the Calm Belt and catch a fish. What's more, they came in all kinds of bizarre shapes and were ferocious beyond measure. Without the skill of a swordmaster who could cut iron, even scraping off their scales was hard work.

Lu Ye marveled at this. No wonder the pirate world doesn't leave anglers empty-handed. The Calm Belt is the paradise every fishing enthusiast dreams of.

Jinbao had disappeared for a year and a half after Lu Ye's home-demolition incident.

That day, Lu Ye had been eating hot pot with Hoffman when he suddenly saw that damn rat sneak in, grinning foolishly at him without a care in the world. Lu Ye nearly shoved him into the pot!

Jinbao clung to Lu Ye's leg and tearfully poured out his grievances from the past year.

Only then did Lu Ye learn that, to save him, Jinbao had intervened with the natives, risking the exposure of the Underworld's existence. He had seriously crossed a red line governing commissioners' conduct, and had spent a year and a half writing self-criticism reports after returning.

Lu Ye scratched his cheek awkwardly, then put on a stern face and said righteously, "Damn rat! Although this was mostly my fault, don't you bear even the tiniest bit of responsibility?"

Huh, why did that sound so familiar?

Jinbao rubbed the new writing callus on the pad of his paw and thought aggrievedly, My biggest mistake was falling for your nonsense. Your willpower is worth jack shit.

Bored out of his mind, Lu Ye remembered that he was still owed the prize draws for his one-month and first-birthday celebrations, and discussed making them up with Jinbao.

Jinbao jolted and waved his paws, refusing repeatedly.

Lu Ye thumped his chest and promised that if the effect was negative, he absolutely wouldn't eat it.

Jinbao didn't believe a word of it. You said the same damn thing last time...

After a long stretch of persistent coaxing, Lu Ye finally managed to talk the damn rat into taking out the prize-draw box.

He drew the trait [Torrent]: water-attribute skills doubled while in a combat state.

Lu Ye decided to test it and had Jinbao attack him to put him into a combat state.

Good grief! Standing at the head of the bed, Lu Ye could pee into the golden toilet across the room. His little bird was like a high-pressure water gun.

This trait was... fucking useless!

The only situation Lu Ye could imagine using it in was on a future blind date:

A huge dining table over ten meters long, with candles burning in the middle and 999 roses arranged on a silver platter.

The girl asked him what his strengths were.

Lu Ye set down his dinner knife and said casually, "I can stand at the head of my bed and pee into the toilet in the bathroom."

Just as the girl's face showed a mixture of embarrassment, indignation, contempt, and disgust in a single instant...

Lu Ye, the walking turnoff, gave her a devilish smile. "My bedroom is two hundred square meters..."

I'm not showing off my wealth. I just want you to know how powerful I am!

Presumably, the girl's face would immediately flush with maidenly embarrassment. "Oh, stop it! When can I see what you can do, handsome...?"

Lu Ye calmly took out a metal case, set it on the table, and slid it across to the girl. Lowering his voice, he said mysteriously:

"Tonight, but I want you to wear this. To be honest, I like Japanese stuff, that Eastern style!"

The girl's pretty face flushed like a soft, ripe peach, and she squirmed coyly in her seat. "Honestly! You filthy men always want to try something different. What's in there? A kimono, right?"

She cracked the case open and peeked inside shyly. In an instant, her blushing face turned ashen.

A kimono, my ass!

Inside was a complete Japanese colonel's uniform!

Lu Ye flexed his fingers, his gaze seductive. "This way... I can reliably enter a combat state."

Jinbao shook Lu Ye hard, stopping him from fantasizing any further. "Are you insane?! No matter how you look at it, that conversation is way too weird!"

"Is it?"

Lu Ye looked up at the sky and countered in a thoughtful tone:

"I think she'd say:

"Pah! Your fetish is as disgusting as a maggot.

"Other than you, I've only met one dumbass who wanted me to play Fahai while he played Xu Xian.

"That's right, your fetishes belong in the same toilet. His is the shit!

"Pay your own bill. I never want to see you again!"

After hearing that, Jinbao covered his face in anguish. He felt as though his brain had been dirtied and wanted to take it out and wash it.

With one first-birthday draw still left, Lu Ye waved his hand sheepishly and said he'd save it for now and draw again when his luck improved, so he wouldn't end up with more trash that was either useless or forced him into confinement.

That wait lasted another two years.

How did that saying go? Time never stays, and the seasons flow by.

Lu Ye just wanted to throw back his head and shout, "Then give me a damn chance to move too!"